Alleluia! Our Atlanta base has a new layover. We are now flying directly from Atlanta to Santa Barbara, California. It’s very rare to get a new layover out of Atlanta. So, when one pops up in the bid package, everyone bids it. We all take our chances the new layover is going to be good. If it’s bad, we won’t bid it again. Astonishingly, there is a very small window to find these things out. You may remember it took me a long time to get a Burlington, Vermont layover. Foolishly, I hesitated bidding the layover when it first appeared in our bid packet. Of course, word quickly spread how nice the Burlington layover was. And before I knew it, the senior Skytresses and Skyters were gobbling those layovers up like they were Biscoff cookies. Egads! Fortunately, I had a feeling Santa Barbara was going to be a spectacular layover. Even more fortunate for me, most of the Skytresses and Skyters my seniority or above are mostly flying International trips these days. Less competition from them meant I held the Santa Barbara layover without having to sell my soul. Not surprisingly, Skytresses and Skyters are always curious what there is to do on a new layover. Many specifically asked me what I did on my Santa Barbara layover. Without hesitation, I enthusiastically told them my crew and I looked for Rob Lowe.

I did not intend to look for Rob Lowe on my Santa Barbara layover. Of course, I did my due diligence and looked up things to do in Santa Barbara before I left for my trip. Not once did I read, “look for Rob Lowe”. I even consulted our crew layover Facebook page for layover suggestions. No one, including Skyter Craig, who set up the Facebook page, mentioned to look for Rob Lowe. Believe me, Skyter Craig usually has the scoop on these things, too. Fortunately for me, I was flying with Skytresss Sandee who simply adores Rob Lowe. She was the one that said we were going to look for Rob Lowe on our layover. Shockingly, Skytress Kendra and I didn’t think this was an odd thing to do on our layover. No siree. We wholeheartedly supported this layover plan. Heck. We even met in the lobby early in the morning to go find Rob Lowe.

I should explain that we didn’t look for Rob Lowe in Santa Barbara. Heck no. We took a five minute Uber ride to Montecito to find him. Skytress Sandee, of course, knew Rob Lowe lives in Montecito. Oprah, Katy Perry, Orlando Blum, Gweneth Paltrow, Adam Levine, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle also live in Montecito. But, we weren’t looking for them. Okay. I’ll admit. I did have one eye constantly looking for Prince Harry. After all, it’s Prince Harry! But, on this layover our main layover objective was to find Rob Lowe. Skytress Sandee talked to our Uber driver about Rob Lowe. She even told him we were going to eat at Jeannine’s in Montecito because she knew Rob Lowe frequently eats there. We discovered our Uber driver was from Montecito. He nonchalantly told Sandee he knew Rob and his wife Sherryl. Say, what!?!?! Good thing I had my seatbelt on or else I surely would have fallen out of the car with this juicy information. I was still reeling from this information when our Uber driver pointed out his wife walking their dog on a side street in Montecito. I’ll admit. I truly expected him to point out Rob Lowe walking down the street, too. Sadly, he didn’t. But, that was perfectly fine. Moments later we arrived at Jeannine’s. We were quite confident we would find Rob Lowe inside eating.

Skytress Sandee may have been looking for Rob Lowe in Jeannine’s. But, the three of us were also looking forward to a scrumptious brunch. If I can base how good a meal is going to be strictly based on the restaurant’s appearance…. and truth be told, I do….well, I knew immediately we were going to have a delicious meal in Jeannine’s. The outside of the restaurant was absolutely adorable. The inside of the restaurant was equally adorable. The three of us ordered our meal and sat down at a table. From my seat I was looking directly at a Montecito police officer enjoying his meal. I tried not to blatantly stare at him. But, it was hard not to. He was dressed immaculately. Montecito has money and high standards. Even the police officer looked like he oozed money. He sure oozed police professionalism. I was fascinated with all the local patrons that came in and out of the restaurant. Of course, I tried not to blatantly stare at them, too. Instead, I “casually observed” them as I ate my Santa Barbara omelette and drank my chai tea latte like a local Montecitan. Thanks to Skytress Sandee, my morning couldn’t have started off better. Realistically, I wasn’t sure if we would ever find Rob Lowe. However, I was absolutely sure I wanted to live in Montecito just so Jeannine’s could be my favorite place to hangout.

Skytress Sandee, Skytress Kendra and I left Jeannine’s and walked around Montecito. We walked into several high end shops. Of course, on the outside they looked like normal boutiques. Once inside we quickly discovered they weren’t. Most items didn’t have price tags. I found this refreshing. Why ruin my shopping experience by showing me I couldn’t afford an item? Yessiree. I say,… “Let a gal dream!” Some shops obviously wanted the shopping experience to be filled with laughter. They blatantly attached price tags to their items. Oh my! I’m still chuckling over the exuberant prices. Remarkably, not all the shops in Montecito were outrageous. They were as normal as Rob Lowe. Ah, yes. Rob Lowe. Sadly, we didn’t find Rob Lowe in any of the shops. However, I did find some clay flower pots in a very cute shop that I couldn’t live without. So, I bought them.

Skytress Sandee’s friends recommended that we get a drink at The Honor Bar. The Honor Bar, like so many restaurants in Montecito, have outdoor seating. There were several tables on the patio near a fireplace that looked inviting. But, it was the chairs perfectly lined up on the sidewalk that captivated my attention. It’s a mandatory people watching setup. I mean if Rob Lowe were to walk by it wouldn’t be star stalking at all. No siree. It would simply be the case of one choosing to sip their drink outside. If pedestrian Rob Lowe happened to walk by, well that would just be serendipity…not star stalking. Since it was still a bit nippy outside we chose to sit inside. Skytress Sandee asked our server if she ever sees Rob Lowe. Shocker alert….Of course, she does! She then told us about the other celebrities that call Montecito home. Without skipping a beat, she said they all are extremely nice and down to earth. Her comment didn’t really surprise us. No siree. One of the first things we discovered on our layover was how overtly nice everyone is in Santa Barbara and Montecito.

Our next Uber driver gave us a mini tour of Montecito and Santa Barbara. She was a wealth of information. Skytress Sandee asked her if she knew Rob Lowe. You guessed it….she did. She worked with Rob Lowe on his tv show, 9-1-1 Lone Star. She knew where Rob Lowe lived, too. We told her she better not tell us or show us. That information would be very dangerous in our hands.

We returned to our layover hotel to drop off my purchases and to regroup before we went on our next adventure. Our Uber driver who worked with Rob Lowe had driven us by Stearns Wharf and State Street on our mini tour. We knew we wanted to go back to both places and enjoy the beautiful day. We enjoyed a glass of wine at Conway Family Wines. We sat outside on the deck and talked as we admired the ocean and mountains surrounding Santa Barbara. It was easy to forget we were on an actual layover. I’ll admit. I half expected to find Rob Lowe surfing in the ocean below us. As I sat there I thought of Ron. Several Charter boats cruised by while the three of us were talking. Ron had a dream to become a charter boat Captain. In my mind I could picture him out on the water. On his off time I could picture him surfing. Ron loved to surf. I smiled when I thought of Ron surfing with Rob Lowe. I know. It sounds far fetched. But, if you knew Ron, you knew it was a good probability that it would happen.

Skytress Kendra, Skytress Sandee and I left Conway Family Wines to head to State Street. Several of the Uber drivers mentioned there was good shopping on State Street. And we know….shopping and Skytresses go hand in hand. Before we left Stearns Wharf we stopped in a gift shop so I could look for a Santa Barbara Christmas ornament. Unfortunately, they didn’t have a Rob Lowe Christmas ornament. I know. They completely missed the mark on this one. Instead, I bought a surfing Santa standing in front of a woody wagon. You know how I love a woody wagon! Santa was just a bonus.

Disappointedly, we didn’t find any worthwhile shopping within walking distance to the wharf on State Street. Skytress Sandee even tried to find a winery her friends had recommended. We didn’t find it, either. But, we did find the Melville Winery Tasting Lounge. Skytress Kendra ordered the estate tasting flight. The three of us were thoroughly entertained as the gentleman server explained each wine selection. He used humor to emphasize each distinct attribute of the wines. I don’t know if our server was a certified sommelier. However, he certifiably knew how to sell the Melville wines.

We asked the two servers in Melville’s for their recommendations on where to eat close by for dinner. They both had different opinions on the best place to eat. Ultimately we decided we would eat closer to our hotel at The Reunion Kitchen. Unfortunately, it wasn’t open. Undeterred, we crossed the street to eat at our hotel’s restaurant. We were able to sit outside and admire the beach and ocean. We didn’t find Rob Lowe at the hotel restaurant. However, we did find the wine we were looking for on State Street. Our hotel served it. They also served some of the best focaccia bread I have ever eaten in my life.

We didn’t accomplish our objective of finding Rob Lowe on this layover. But, don’t feel too bad for us. Skytress Sandee, Skytress Kendra and I had an excellent day exploring Santa Barbara and Montecito. We all wholeheartedly agreed that Santa Barbara is a gem of a layover. I’ll admit. I had grandiose plans the following week when I had another Santa Barbara layover. Sadly, I didn’t find Rob Lowe on this layover either. Actually, I never left my hotel room. That wasn’t my grandiose plan. No siree. Unfortunately, I could tell my back was on the verge of going out. I knew bed rest was going to be my best medicine. I know. Just call me Dr. Skytress. I did open my curtains so I could see the ocean outside my window. All day long I watched a plethora of boats pass bye. Believe me. That truly was the best medicine for my Skytress back and Skytress soul. Happily, I have another Santa Barbara layover in October. I vow not to stay in my hotel room on this trip. No siree. I vow to head to Montecito to my new hangout, Jeannine’s. I vow to go back to Emily Joubert’s where I got my clay flower pots and buy something else I can’t live without. More importantly, I vow to find Rob Lowe! Of course, I’ll keep an eye out for Prince Harry, too. I’m sure if I find one, I’ll find the other. Like I said, everyone seems to know Rob Lowe. I’m sure Prince Harry is no exception.

My Skytress friend, Nicole, and I were walking up the street in Santa Fe. A homeless man was walking behind us yelling, “You’re all fakes!” Nicole and I continued walking up the street trying to ignore the gentleman. Still, he kept yelling out to everyone on the street. A kind woman who was standing in a shop doorway called out to us, “Ladies come inside”. Nicole and I stepped inside the shop. The gentleman continued up the street shouting, “You’re all fakes”. I turned to the woman, I smiled, and said, “Some days I think I am a fake”. We all laughed. The three of us stood in the shop for a few more moments. Nicole and I thanked the woman again for looking out for us. Then we left the shop and crossed the street to continue our shopping. I thought about the gentleman when we got back to our hotel in Albuquerque. The truth be told, the gentleman was correct. Nicole and I had been faking it all the way to Santa Fe.

Santa Fe is an hour drive from our Albuquerque layover. I’ve wanted to travel to Santa Fe ever since my Skytress friend, Meagan, took a day trip there on one of her long Albuquerque layovers. I’ll admit. I’ve been looking for a long commutable Albuquerque layover for months. I was excited when got my bid results and saw I would have a long Albuquerque layover at the end of August. I was even more excited when my Skytress friend, Nicole, swapped on my trip. Skytress Nicole is one of my favorite people. I’ll forever be grateful for her friendship and support after Ron died. She was a blessing I never knew I needed. But, God sure did. Skytress Nicole was going to be our Skytress In-Charge for our trip. Nicole hadn’t flown in-charge for 20 years. I knew she was extremely nervous about this fact. I tried to calm Nicole’s fears by telling her I would assist her with the “Skytress In-Charge” position. The passengers would never know Nicole hadn’t flown this position in ages. Yessiree. We would fake that part. I’m proud to report Nicole was so good at faking it, even I forgot she didn’t fly as the Skytress In-Charge on a regular basis. Now that’s the ultimate faker for you! Heck. Nicole was such an incredible Skytress In-Charge…. our crew will never forget there is an “e” at the end of the word turquoise. Unfortunately, I can’t divulge this story due to aviation security protocols. However, if you are a Skytress, Skyter or Pilot….I suspect you are giggling right now.

I can divulge to everyone Nicole and I created a new crew position on our trip. Yessiree. We created the “Lead Aircraft Lighting Engineer”. We officially created this position for Skyter James. Skyter James was, without a doubt, the best Lead Aircraft Lightning Engineer we could have asked for. Yessiree. He didn’t fake this position. Each leg Skyter James would get the Boeing 737-900 aircraft lights to work on the touch screen panel when we couldn’t. I’ll admit. Towards the end of the trip Nicole and I didn’t even try working the aircraft lights. Heck. We knew James had everything under control. This made him an absolute hero in our books! I’ll admit. I did feel a wee bit guilty I got to work with Skyter James more than Skytress Nicole did on our trip. I know for a fact James and I were having loads more fun in the back of the airplane than Nicole was having up front. Each leg of our trip Skytress Nicole had to deal with a problem passenger. I repeat. Every stinking leg! Egads! Unfortunately for Nicole, these passengers simply refused to fake being nice or normal.

Unfortunately for Nicole and me, Skyter James met up with his Aunt and Uncle on our Albuquerque layover. We would have loved spending the day in Santa Fe with him. Heck. James could have been our “Lead Backseat Engineer”. I’m sure Skyter James would have easily figured out how to lower the backseat solar shades on the car I rented. I unknowingly hit a button to make them go up. For the life of me, I never could figure out what button I hit. Embarrassingly, we had drawn solar shades the entire trip back to Albuquerque. Egads! The car I rented was from Turo. Now I’ve rented many cars in my Skytress career. However, I had never rented a car from Turo before. The big advantage of renting from Turo is the fact many hosts will bring the car to your location. Our hotel in Albuquerque didn’t have a designated hotel shuttle to the airport and car rental agencies. Thus, having a rental car brought directly to us was truly convenient. I’ll admit. I definitely felt out of my comfort zone booking through Turo. The process was completely different than renting from other car rental agencies. Of course, I faked it to Nicole that I had everything under control. Dealing with an individual person and knowing you would be driving their car was a wee bit stressful for me. However, I loved being able to choose the exact car I wanted to drive. For months now, I have been thinking about trading in my Suburban. One of the cars I am considering buying is the Genesis GV80. So of course, that is what I rented. My Turo car host, Sarah couldn’t have been more gracious. She texted me recommendations of where to park in Santa Fe. She even gave us restaurant recommendations. Both proved to be invaluable. If she could have given me the heads up about the solar shade button, that would have been perfect. I’ll admit. I may have been the designated driver for our road trip to Santa Fe. But, Skytress Nicole was definitely my designated driving instructor. Sadly, my Suburban doesn’t have the advanced technology features of the Genesis SUV. Good golly. I didn’t even fake how overwhelmed I was with the SUV’s technology. Fortunately, Nicole drives a BMW with many of the Genesis features. Heck. If it wasn’t for Nicole, I’m sure I’d still be at our layover hotel sitting in the car trying to start it.

Nicole and I talked nonstop on the hour drive to Santa Fe. When we arrived in Santa Fe we quickly discovered parking is a major issue. Fortunately for us, our Turo host suggested we park the car in the La Fonda Hotel parking garage. So we did just that. Astonishingly, we didn’t have any plans when we walked outside the parking garage. I know. Who comes to Santa Fe for the day without a plan? Well, Skytress Nicole and I did. Heck. Who needs a set agenda? Sure. We had a very basic idea of what we wanted to do. The rest of the day we just faked it like we had a well- thought out plan.

I knew I wanted to visit the two famous churches in Santa Fe. The Cathedral Basilica of St. Francis of Assisi and the Loretto Chapel. We visited the Cathedral Basilica first. The gentleman at the information desk gave us a quick history lesson on the Basilica. On the gentleman’s suggestion, Nicole and I walked to the small adobe chapel located on the side of the church. The adobe chapel is an original part of the church from 1714. Although it was small in size, it was simply beautiful. In fact, the small altar and artifacts housed in the adobe chapel made it feel extremely special. I felt very peaceful standing in the chapel. Nicole and I lit candles. I lit a candle for my Dad and Ron. I suspected Nicole lit a candle for her Dad. Neither one of us mentioned who we lit our candles for. But, God knew. My heart swelled when I saw Pope John Paul II’s Zucchetto on display. I immediately thought of my Dad. My Dad, sister Patti, and brother Brian were blessed to see Pope John Paul II when he came to St. Louis on his papal visit in 1999. My Dad was a very proud Catholic and cherished his faith. These days I cherish the fact my Dad not only got to see the Pope, but, saw a future Saint.

After feeding our souls at the Cathedral Basilica, Skytress Nicole and I headed to The Shed to feed our hungry bellies. The Shed came highly recommended by several people. Skytress Nicole and I ate in the adobe hacienda part of the restaurant. This part of the property dates back to 1692. Admittedly, I knew before I saw the menu that I was going to have chicken enchiladas. Ron loved making enchiladas. Dios Mi’o! Ron made excellent enchiladas. Try as I might, I can never make my chicken enchiladas taste as delicious as his. So every opportunity I get to have enchiladas, I do. Nicole and I both ordered the chicken enchiladas with the Christmas sauce. Santa Fe is known for it’s Christmas sauce. Christmas sauce is red and green enchilada sauce on your food. Boy, oh boy! The Christmas sauce made me as happy as a child on Christmas morning.

I was just as happy when Nicole and I visited the Loretto Chapel. The chapel is known for its miraculous staircase. Amazingly, Nicole and I experienced a little miracle of our own as soon as we sat down in the chapel. The audio tape explaining the miracle of the staircase and the history of the chapel started from the beginning as soon as we sat in the pew. I sat and marveled at the exquisite architecture of the chapel as we listened to the audio coming from the speakers. I smiled listening to the story of how the nuns prayed to St. Joseph…the patron saint of carpenters….for a carpenter to come build a staircase for them to access the choir loft. Other carpenters told the nuns it was simply impossible to build a staircase in the church due to the space constraints. Undeterred, the nuns prayed. God listened. The nuns’ prayers were answered. A carpenter did come. He requested he be able to work alone in the church. The nuns granted his simple request. The carpenter miraculously built the staircase without using nails or glue. He built it out of wood completely unknown in the area. When he finished constructing the staircase, he disappeared before the nuns could pay him or discover his name. But, God knew. Isn’t that a glorious story? Nicole and I walked over to admire the miraculous staircase. Then we strolled into the gift shop. I had unyielding faith I would find the perfect Christmas ornament to take home. And I did! Nicole got a Christmas ornament, too. There is no faking it…I’m always happy when my quirky Christmas ornament collecting rubs off on my friends.

Nicole and I walked round Santa Fe after we left the Loretto Chapel. I even bought another Santa Fe Christmas ornament. I know. This doesn’t shock anyone. You might be shocked to know I left my cell phone in the ladies rest room, though. Not as shocked as I was. Egads! I wish I was faking this story. But, I’m not. I left my cell phone in the ladies restroom at the La Fonda Hotel as we were getting ready to head back to Albuquerque. Thankfully it was still there when we ran back to the ladies room. I was still saying prayers of thanks when we arrived back in Albuquerque. I was grateful I had my cell phone and more importantly the Genesis was still in one piece. To celebrate, Nicole and I went to eat pizza. Okay. I faked that part. We went to eat because we were hungry. Of course, we tried to fake ourselves into believing we didn’t have to get up early the next morning to go to work. But, we couldn’t. However in my head, instead of calling it going to work, I called it taking the long way home.

The crew was genuinely excited to see each other in the morning. The crew van chatter consisted of everyone telling what they did on our Albuquerque layover. We were still upbeat when we got on the aircraft. Unfortunately I can’t fake it and say the rest of the day was uneventful. Heck. I already told you about the passengers that refused to fake they were normal and nice. Regrettably, we had a situation on our flight back to Atlanta from Austin that also wasn’t normal or nice. Gee wiz. If Nicole was slightly contemplating flying in-charge again, this situation quelled that. Yessiree. In the rush to close the aircraft door on time, the gate agents in Austin accidentally mistagged several passenger bags. Egads! Skyter James diligently handled one of our passenger’s mistagged bag issues. He along with Skytress Nicole were able to get the gentleman’s bag reunited with him when we got to Atlanta. We aren’t sure what happened to the other passenger bags that were mistagged. I’m fairly certain one day I will be flying a trip when a passenger tells me about the time they checked their bag in Austin and it didn’t show up at baggage claim. Do I fake I have no idea what they are talking about? Decisions….decisions.

There are many times I don’t have any idea how I’m going to make it through a particular situation. I like to say I’ll “ fake it until I make it”. So, again, the gentleman walking up the street in Santa Fe was correct. I am a fake. Faking you know what you are doing isn’t always the worst thing. Heck. I had absolutely no idea if I made the right decision renting a car through Turo. Or even if going to Santa Fe would be worth it. Fortunately, faking our way to Santa Fe turned out to be a blast. I would do it again in a heartbeat. Flying with Skytress Nicole and Skyter James on this trip was blast, too. They are the real deal when it comes to outstanding Skytresses and Skyters. More importantly, they are the real deal when it comes to being genuine caring, compassionate people that love to have a great time. Yessiree. Some things you can’t fake in life. If I ever visit Santa Fe again, I’ll be sure to tell the gentleman walking up the street this very thing.

I am writing this blog post sitting in the middle seat on the Airbus 321. My crew and I are deadheading back to Atlanta from Salt Lake City. Last night we deadheaded to Salt Lake City and had a short layover. It isn’t common to deadhead in to a city and then deadhead back out. But, this week has been any thing but common at my airline. We have been the unfortunate victims of CrowdStrike’s cyber glitch. Now, I have seen and been part of numerous non-routine days at my airline. But, this glitch has been the glitchiest glitch of them all.

When I got home in the wee hours on July 19th, I had no idea I had avoided a major computer meltdown. My sister had made a comment on my Instagram post that I was lucky I had arrived home at 2:30 am. I quickly did a Google search and discovered that many airlines had been the victims of the CrowdStrike computer outage. My airline posted that they were taking a pause to reset our Microsoft system. Flights were delayed in the process. Unfortunately, this disruption in flights quickly snowballed. Our computer system, especially the system that keeps track of crews and their rotations, had to be manually restarted. Our crew system has many complicated layers to it. Each layer had to be manually reset. This caused a major bugaboo for everyone. Scheduling had to figure out where crews were and how to get them to the next destination. We have over 4000 daily flights. Our crew scheduling is a mighty department. But, with this number of flights and crew to track manually, things got back to normal at a snail’s pace.

Our airline immediately put out the call for crews to pick up trips. They were offering incentive pay to sweeten the pot. However, due to the disruption in crew tracking, Skytresses and Skyters had to have a day off following any trips they picked up. Scheduling knew the likelihood of getting crews back on time to fly their regular rotations was very slim. Thus, trips remained in the system that needed to be covered.

Another harsh reality was that crews were timing out on their duty limitations. Crew accommodations was trying to get hotels for the crews that needed them. Crew tracking was trying to find available Skytresses, Skyters and pilots to replace these crew members who were now illegal to fly. All this was happening while our IT personnel was feverishly trying manually to reboot our 37,000 computer systems. Since our airline had to pause its flights, Skytresses, Skyters and pilots that commute to their bases weren’t able to make it to base to report for their trips on time. Our airline continued to send out SOS calls for employees to pick up trips out of any base they could. They also doubled the incentive pay to entice even more people to pick up trips.

I started tracking the flights between St. Louis and Atlanta. Most of my flights were either canceled or delayed at least four hours. If I lived in Atlanta I might have picked up a trip to help the operation. However, lack of flights and lack of faith kept me at home. Yessiree. I had previously experienced a computer meltdown several years prior. It’s now a great Skytress war story that has left me with ACS-PTSD… Airline Computer System -Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. At the time it was chaos at its best. Fortunately, I had a great crew. We laughed through it all. It also helped that one of my Skytresses had been a former gate agent. She was able to help our agents check-in passenger through the computer system. Our agents had to resort back to our old computer system to get flights boarded. Fortunately, Skytress Jamie was familiar with this older computer system. Skytress Jamie even helped get our crew checked-in for our deadhead flight to Raleigh Durham. We were supposed to fly to Raleigh Durham and work a flight back the next morning. Instead, we deadheaded back out of Raleigh the next morning back to Atlanta. Sounds familiar, eh? That time…Deadhead to Raleigh to deadhead out of Raleigh. This time…Deadhead to Salt Lake City to deadhead out of Salt Lake City. That particular trip we eventually worked a flight to Washington D.C.’s Dulles airport. We then went to the airport hotel. Our schedules were updated every few minutes. It actually became humorous how quickly we were rerouted and then rerouted again minutes later. Ron wasn’t flying when the computers went down. However, I know he had ACS-PTSD just from me constantly updating him on our whereabouts and what was happening at the airports. Ron was on standby during this computer glitch. Not on standby to fly. No siree. He was on standby to rescue me from the airport if need be. Fortunately, it only took our airline a day and a half to recover from this computer glitch. Sadly, the same couldn’t be said about the CrowdStrike glitch.

The effects of the CrowdStrike glitch were being felt well into the weekend. Our airline granted positive space seats for Skytresses, Skyters and pilots to fly to base and then eventually fly home. Our airline needed crews to get to base to cover trips. They needed crews to be able to get home and get legal rest. I immediately booked my positive space seat for work. I had to fly on Tuesday. I knew I would need a backup flight to make sure I made it to Atlanta on time to fly my trip. I was grateful I had my positive space flight, too. My earlier flight to Atlanta was delayed due to pilot rest requirements. Thankfully, my positive space flight was on time. This was positively wonderful for me…. and my airline since I made it to work on time.

I wasn’t sure what I was going to encounter when I got to the crew lounge. When I walked out of the elevator I saw a crew lounge filled with Skytresses and Skyters. I had never seen the likes of this before. Bodies were everywhere. Apparently I missed the brunt of the displaced crews. Another Skytress told me the day before there were so many Skytresses and Skyters in the crew lounge most people had to either sit on the floor or stand because all the seats were occupied. When I sat down at the computer I heard story after story from crews that were either rerouted or were delayed. I could tell after 5 days things were still a mess. I saw my trip was showing on time. Foolishly, I thought maybe I would go unscathed with reroutes. After all, it was a simple trip. Heck. We had a complete crew, airplane, and passengers. Well, at least for a short time. Our original pilots got rerouted minutes before I left the crew lounge. Then our airplane was sent somewhere else.

Our deadhead to Salt Lake City was actually a scheduled deadhead. We were to lay over in Salt Lake City and then fly to Burbank the next morning. Our flight to Salt Lake City was delayed due to storms in Atlanta. Unfortunately, we had a short layover in Salt Lake City. Somewhere on our way to Salt Lake City we received a new reroute. We were no longer going to Burbank. The flight would have to be delayed too long for us to get our minimum crew rest. Thus, we were rescheduled to deadhead back to Atlanta and pick up our rotation there. We weren’t the only crews deadheading into and out of Salt Lake City. We had close to 30 Skytresses, Skyters and pilots deadheading on each flight. The computer glitch was working in my favor. I spent 2 days sitting on an airplane writing my blog posts and watching YouTube videos. I was perfectly content.

The second day of our trip I could definitely tell our airline had a better control on things. Flights were leaving on time and crews were flying their scheduled rotations. Alleluia! Things were getting back to normal. More importantly, it looked like I would arrive back to St. Louis on time at the end of my three-day trip. And we all know,…that truly is the most important part of any flight rotation. Well, at least in my Skytress mind it is.

The government has stated they are looking into our recovery process from the CrowdStrike computer debacle. I know our airline is, too. Our airline relies on CrowdStrike and Microsoft more than any other airline. Our airline wants CrowdStrike to compensate us for lost revenue. The computer glitch affected more than 1.3 million of our airline customers. CrowdStrike is blaming our airline for the slow recovery. They claim our airline refused help from them. We have learned CrowdStrike’s help was just a reference to a public website where instructions were posted on how to manually reboot each computer. Egads! I know our airline will definitely learn from what went right to what went wrong in our recovery process. Five days to recover from a computer glitch is unfathomable. Sadly, I feel this may not be the last time we experience a computer meltdown. Between hackers and computer updates that come with unforeseen glitches, we are extremely susceptible as an airline industry. I’m positive my ACS-PTSD from computer glitches will see more ACS-PTSD before my flying days are over. Hopefully, the odds will be in my favor though. I don’t know how many more computer meltdowns my aging Skytress heart can take.

On July 16th I hopped in my car at 440am to head to the St. Louis airport. It was thundering as I got in my car. Egads. This was not a good sign. I immediately wondered if I would…or could… beat the rain to the airport. I turned on the car radio to give me some inspirational beat the rain to the airport music. In retrospect, I should have been singing, “Rain, rain, go away. Come back another day”. Sadly, I didn’t beat the rain. Instead, I stepped out of my car as a torrential downpour fell from the sky. The kind employee shuttle driver waited for me to make the mad dash from my car to his shuttle. I was in the rain less than a minute. But when I walked into the airport restroom after I got off the employee shuttle, I looked like I had taken a shower in my uniform. This definitely wasn’t how I wanted to start my first day back flying after being off four months. Unfortunately, rain would be my nemesis for the next three days.

My three-day trip looked harmless on paper. Yessiree. I told myself it would be the perfect trip to ease myself back into flying. After a Fort Myers turn we would fly to Daytona Beach for a nice layover. Our flight back to Atlanta was scheduled for 3pm the next day. My crew and I had the same excellent plan for our Daytona layover. We all planned to sleep in! Mother Nature had other plans. Eh! Doesn’t she always have other plans? Our first flight to Fort Myers was delayed because of rain. Thank you Mother Nature. Despite this, my crew and I had ambitious plans to turn the flight around as quickly as possible when we got to Fort Myers. Not surprisingly, the agents in Fort Myers were even more ambitious. They had been dealing with flight delays all day because of the weather. Or should I say, because of Mother Nature?

Mother Nature threw us a nasty curve ball on our takeoff from Fort Myers. I was sitting on the front jumpseat with my Skytress In-Charge. We were enthusiastically solving the world’s problems. I mean, we were enthusiastically doing our mental review for takeoff as required by our airline. Wink. Wink. We were on a rapid rollout when the pilots quickly brought the aircraft to a stop. I immediately knew we aborted our takeoff due to wind sheer. Although, it rarely happens, one never forgets that feeling. My very junior Skytress In-Charge had never had an aborted takeoff due to wind sheer. She wasn’t sure what had happened. I explained about the wind sheer. I explained the brakes get so hot from aborting a takeoff that we most likely would need to wait for the brakes to cool off before we could take off again for Atlanta. I should have followed this explanation with a round of, “Rain, rain, go away. Come back another day”. Yessiree. We couldn’t go back to the gate because Mother Nature whipped up some horrendous lightning to go along with the heavy rain. The ramp closed for the safety of the ramp agents. Of course, we eventually went back to the gate when the lightening cleared. Not because the brakes needing more time to cool down. No siree. We had passengers that wanted to get off the airplane. They were going to miss their connections in Atlanta. These passengers decided they would rather sleep in their own beds than sleep in a hotel bed in Atlanta. Unfortunately for us, scheduling rerouted us to sleep in a bed in Atlanta instead of bed in Daytona Beach. Scheduling deemed we wouldn’t make it back to Atlanta in time to fly to Daytona. Scheduling also decided the next day we would get up early and go to Washington D.C. and back before we resumed our original rotation. I swear Mother Nature and Crew Scheduling were in cahoots with each other. So, after 22 hours of sporting bad rain weather hair, I finally put my head down on my hotel pillow in Atlanta for my minimum crew rest.

I felt I dealt admirably with our short domicile layover. Heck. We were still going to Jackson Hole. A short Jackson Hole layover beats a no Jackson Hole layover any day. As soon as the gate agent in Jackson Hole opened the aircraft door, my soul was resuscitated by the cool gentle breeze and the glorious view of the Grand Tetons. I’m not sure who got the approval to put the Jackson Hole airport smack dab in the middle of the Grand Teton National Park. But, kudos to them. Unfortunately, they did fail miserably for not getting a special dispensation for lavatory trucks to be able to dump the lavs while on national park land. Talk about a stinky situation in the morning. Oh, well. I’ll take stinky lavatories in exchange for the Grand Teton mountain views any day of the week.

Instead of gawking at the Grand Tetons on the way back to the airport the next morning, I should have been saying, “Rain, rain. Go away. Come back another day”. Yessiree. The combination of go home day and rain is never a winning combination. Of course, we made it back to Atlanta from Jackson Hole without any issues. Of course, we had a long sit in Atlanta without any issues. Of course, when it was time to go to Milwaukee on our last turn….we had issues. Rain issues. Our plane to Milwaukee was delayed coming in from Chicago because of weather. This delay proved to be perfect timing for the thunderstorms to build up around the Atlanta airport. Obviously, Mother Nature didn’t want the rain to come back another day. No siree. She insisted it come immediately after we boarded the airplane for Milwaukee and pushed back from the gate. She also insured our APU…the auxiliary power unit….that cools the aircraft… was not functioning properly. Darn you Mother Nature!

I should have sang, “Rain. Rain. Go away.Come back another day” all the way to Milwaukee. Only I was too busy checking and rechecking my last commuter flight home. I swear I could hear Mother Nature laughing at her handy work while I feverishly refreshed the flight app. Eventually, I came to the realization that after a short layover in Jackson Hole, where I only got two hours of sleep, I would have to spend the night in the lounge and catch the first flight home in the morning. In my state of dejection, I somehow remembered my Skytress trump card. Yessiree. The Rerouted Skytress trump card I needed to beat Mother Nature at her own game. I had a kind conversation with God. I told him I readily accepted the fact I was going to have to stay in the crew lounge. But, I would also greatly appreciate it if he would delay my flight home to St. Louis. You bet I asked my angels in Reroute Heaven to work their magic to delay my flight home, too. You know the saying, “ask and you shall receive?” Well, it doesn’t always work when it comes to winning the Power Ball lottery. But, it sure works enough times for me when it comes to delaying my flight home. This night was no exception. Yes. I did have to power walk to my gate. But, I made it to the gate in time for the boarding process.

I’d like to say that was my happy ending to my first trip back after four months off. But, a wee bit of drama ensued before we took off for St. louis. We had an aborted takeoff. Yes. I know I said it rarely happens. But, I haven’t written a flying blog post in a while. So apparently God wanted to make sure I had ample material. Our aircraft was on our takeoff rollout when, as the Captain said, “We had a runway conflict with another aircraft and had to abort our takeoff”. Simply put, another aircraft crossed our runway when they shouldn’t have. Fortunately, we weren’t at maximum speed. Fortunately, our brakes didn’t need extra time to cool off. After a short delay I was heading home to St. Louis. I was up 24 hours when I eventually got home. I considered myself very lucky. If I hadn’t made my flight home I would have been caught up in the CrowdStrike computer glitch that paralyzed our airline. That glitch happened on Friday. Our airline was still reeling from the effects on Tuesday when I went back to work. Forget, “Rain. Rain. Go away”. My rally cry for that trip should have been, “Come back another day”. Egads!

Ronald, many days have passed since you were called home to Heaven. But, for me, it still feels like yesterday.

“Never Not Remember You” by Cooper Alan

I know you’re up in Heaven, but damn it hurts like hell

‘Cause I’d just be pretendin’ if I said anything else

And I know God don’t make mistakes, but this sure feels like one

That won’t change the facts, that won’t bring you back

So I’ll cry ‘cause it’s over and smile because we had ya

Packed a whole lot of livin’ even though it ended all too soon

And in time, I’ll start healin’, but even when I get that feelin’

No matter where I go or what I do, I’ll never not remember you

Thank God for all the memories and pictures on my phone

They don’t fill the empty, but I feel less alone

And I know you’re with the angels, right where you belong

‘Cause you were one to us, you left a legacy of love

So I’ll cry ‘cause it’s over and smile because we had ya

Packed a whole lot of livin’ even though it ended all too soon

And in time, I’ll start healin’, but even when I get that feelin’

No matter where I go or what I do, I’ll never not remember you

You lightin’ up a whole room like that

You made us think, made us feel, made us all laugh

You always givin’ that shirt off your back

I miss you bad, I miss you bad

So I’ll cry ‘cause it’s over, smile because we had ya

Packed a whole lot of livin’ even though it ended all too soon

And in time, I’ll start healin’, but even when I get that feelin’

No matter where I go or what I do, I’ll never not remember you

Oh, I promise you, I’ll never not remember you

I wrote this blog post several weeks ago when I went to get an oil change for my Suburban. If I have to say so myself,…and I most definitely will,…it was a very witty blog post. Yessiree. It should have come with a warning for those reading it while sitting on the aisle seat on the airplane. They had better make sure their seatbelt was securely fastened. If not, they could possibly roll down the aisle from uncontrollable laughter. My original plan was to finish writing my blog on Saturday and post it the Tuesday after Memorial Day. Considering I haven’t posted a blog in quite some time, I was very happy with my plan. Now I’m sure we’ve all heard the Yiddish proverb, “Man plans and God laughs”. Well, if God was sitting on the aisle seat on the airplane, he was most definitely wearing his seatbelt. God knew my blog post plan. Thus, he put on his seatbelt so he wouldn’t roll down the aisle from uncontrollable laughter.

It should be noted I did have a gut feeling earlier in the month that God had a plan that would trump any of my plans. This feeling immediately came over me when I left my foot doctor’s appointment. My foot doctor informed me I wouldn’t be able to go back flying for several more weeks. Unfortunately, the swelling in my foot needed to decrease more before I could return to my Skytress life. I’ll admit. It didn’t bother me one scintilla that I couldn’t go back flying. I actually joked with my doctor about her extending my medical leave. I told her I was getting a taste of retirement life from being off for so long….and I rather liked it. Heck. Every day has been like a Saturday since I had my foot surgery. I’ve rarely thought about flying since my last trip on March 8th. Incredibly, I completely forgot about my 34th Skytress anniversary. I even forgot about “The Rerouted Skytress” blog’s fourth anniversary. Not surprisingly, I haven’t miss commuting, weather delays, reroutes or the crew lounge. Still, when I walked out of the doctor’s office excited my pre-retirement days would continue, I absolutely knew God was delaying my return to work for another reason. Every day I wondered when God would reveal his plan. Well, God decided to divulge his plan the Saturday I planned to finish writing my blog post. Unfortunately that night, my mom fell in the bathroom and broke her femur. Holy moly! That was a heck of a plan. Don’t you agree? So, instead of working on my blog, I was welcoming the paramedics from Station #3 into our house. A short time later the paramedics whisked my 84 -year old mom off to the emergency room. My sister, Patti, followed them to the hospital. I stayed home with my brother Brian. After all, I was a semi- retiree. Plus, I loathe emergency rooms. Loathe is actually an understatement. Thankfully for all of us, my sister isn’t retired and doesn’t abhor emergency rooms like I do. I’ll admit. She was definitely stinky from camping earlier in the day. But, that was a minor inconvenience for everyone. Well, except for me. I couldn’t smell my sister when she was at the hospital and I was at home. I wholeheartedly approved this part of God’s plan.

My mom was transferred to another hospital in the middle of the night. She needed to have a trauma orthopedist operate on her leg. Unfortunately, the hospital closest to our house didn’t have a trauma orthopedist on staff. I’ll admit. I never heard of a trauma orthopedist before that night. My reaction to hearing “trauma orthopedist” was comparable to hearing “Skytress” or “Skyter” for the first time. I was intrigued beyond words. I pictured a trauma orthopedist having extra special powers like Skytresses and Skyters do. Skytresses and Skyters can make a seven course meal from leftovers on the aircraft. Then serve it to a full airplane on a 30-minute flight….and still have the galleys sparkling clean before the seatbelt sign comes on for the initial descent. Trauma orthopedists? Well, they just have specialized surgical skills. They can’t speed up or slow down time like Skytresses and Skyters can. Time apparently stands still for trauma orthopedists. Especially on a holiday weekend. Unfortunately, my mom had to wait a day to have surgery. Her surgery took place on Memorial Day. Fortunately, the upswing to having surgery on Memorial Day is the surgical waiting room is completely empty. It was this semi-retired Skytress’ delight….no people sitting in rows of seats staring at me! Interestingly, in contrast to emergency rooms, I’m perfectly okay sitting in a surgical waiting room. Go figure. Thankfully, my mom’s surgery was successful. However, Dr. Trump….I kid you not about his name…. informed us she wouldn’t be able to put weight on her leg for six weeks. In essence, my mom’s leg was getting a taste of retirement, too. Two days later my mom had to have a blood transfusion. Then the day my mom was supposed to be released to a rehab facility she tested positive for Covid. Egads. This was the first time my mom has ever had Covid. We quickly discovered the original rehab facility my mom was scheduled to go to couldn’t take my mom because she had Covid. Ah, yes. “Man plans and God laughs”. I told myself and everyone else that God apparently had a better plan for my mom. And he did. The new rehab facility is closer to our home. The staff couldn’t be more wonderful. My mom even has a spacious private room. Since I’m sort of retired, I go visit her every day. Plus, I’m one of my Mom’s favorite daughters. Which works out well, since she is my favorite Mom.

Who knew my taste of retirement would include so much time navigating around a plethora of medical situations? Not me. But, then again, my taste of retirement started with my own medical procedure. So I guess the medical mayhem actually started with me. Egads! Sadly, my taste of retirement will be coming to an end in a few weeks. My medical leave ends July 10th. I’ll admit. I’m trying to use every ounce of my special Skytress power to slow down time. Heck. I’ve barely had time to enjoy the retirement perk of sleeping in. I haven’t dawdled or tinkered like a true retiree. Sure, I whittled away two days on my iPad looking for the perfect planter for my flowers. But, mostly I’ve whittled away time driving to and from hospitals and rehab facilities. Where’s the retirement fun in that? I did get to piddle in the kitchen making cookies for the paramedics at Station #3. Not surprisingly, I’ve discovered I like piddling. Heck. I’m sure Station #3 likes my piddling pastime, too. I’ll admit. I would like more retirement days to hang out with my mom as she recovers from her broken femur. After all, I am one of her favorite daughters. Yessiree. I don’t show up stinky from camping and I make cookies! I know some of my of my Skytress and Skyter friends haven’t even had an appetizer taste-test of retirement. Their time clocks don’t include any components for piddling, dawdling, tinkering or whittling away time. Unlike them, come July 10th, I’m going to use my super Skytress powers to speed up time. For me, my taste of retirement has been delicious. I’d like another hearty serving, please. Heck. I’d like a full-blown smorgasbord of retirement. Here’s hoping I get the early-bird special. Here’s to also hoping God didn’t put on his seatbelt when he heard this plan.

I can’t believe it’s been a little over a month since I had my foot surgery. I’ll admit. I haven’t thought much about flying in all that time. I did think about flying a lot on April 8th, though. My airline had two solar eclipse flights that day. Good golly. I would have hopped on my one good foot for hours to work either one of those flights. Instead, I hobbled outside to the patio with my faithful dog Finley and looked towards the sun. Of course, I wore my solar eclipse glasses. Finley did not. She immediately closed her eyes and took a nap in the shady grass. I ordered my solar eclipse glasses weeks prior on Amazon. I’ll have you know, I ordered Moon Pies the same day. Don’t judge. I needed the Moon Pies for the solar eclipse snacks and for The Masters golf tournament dinner. Oh, how I love a theme! I’ll admit. I’ve had many theme days since my foot surgery. My poor family! What can I say? Since I can’t fly, I’ve had loads of time to ponder about theme days. Heck. Since my foot surgery, I’ve had loads of time to ponder about many things. Not surprisingly, most of my pondering has revolved around my foot. Sadly, I’ve had a lot of quality time to stare at it and think about it. Even more sad, I’ve actually taken the time to scribble down these thoughts. I affectionately refer to these mental notes as my….foot notes. Wink. Wink…..I know. I definitely need to get back flying. The sooner, the better…. for all of us!

My return date to go back flying is still….. up in the air. Come on. I had to write that! Plus, technically, it’s an airline term. Wink. Wink. My first foot note I jotted down was the miscalculation of my recovery time. Believe me….it was a drastic Skytress miscalculation. Silly me. I thought for sure I’d be back flying six weeks after my foot surgery. Heck. I even chuckled under my breath when our airline in-flight administrator suggested I could be off three to four months before I was cleared to fly. I have no doubt she had a hearty laugh with her co-workers when I confidently told her I’d be back flying in six weeks. Well, our in-flight administrator got the last laugh. It’s been five weeks since my surgery. Last Thursday my foot doctor said I could finally wear a regular shoe on my foot…..for one hour. She said I could slowly increase the time each day. Heck. I barely lasted the full hour on the first day. Still, I’ve been increasing my shoe wearing time by fifteen minutes every day. I’ve done my Skytress calculations, my sweet friends. Based on this rate I’ll never be able to run a full marathon in my lifetime. Thank goodness!

Another foot note states that I am eternally grateful I have a sister that is a physical therapist. Yessiree. She has been a godsend. In my opinion, her tips and tricks to help my recovery go more smoothly was worth all the tuition she had to pay for her degree. Sure, I had to sit through all her disgusting gross anatomy stories at dinner time. But, now I look at it as a small price I had to pay for having a private physical therapist in my time of need. I’ll admit. My sister’s job was made much easier considering we have every walking cane, crutch, ice machine, heating pad and grip-grabbing tool known to mankind in our basement. But, hey. I didn’t have to schlep down the stairs to get them. And for this fact alone, my sister gets the “best sister…who happens to be a physical therapist” award.

It should be noted I won’t be receiving the best patient award. No siree. When I got home from my surgery I failed to read the post surgery instructions in my outpatient folder. I finally read the paperwork a week later. That’s when the guilt and worry set in. Half the things I did, I shouldn’t have done after surgery. Conversely, there were other things I didn’t do that I should have done. Egads. I’ll admit. I prayed the entire car ride to my first doctor’s appointment after my surgery. I was convinced in one short week I had royally messed up my foot. Yessiree. My Irish-Catholic guilt meter was off the charts. You can’t imagine my relief when my doctor said she was extremely pleased with how my foot was healing. She then informed me I had the hardest foot bone she has ever operated on. My Irish- Catholic guilt morphed into Skytress pride. I enthusiastically accepted this accolade. Heck. My hard foot bone was years in the making!

My doctor gave me the go ahead to drive a couple weeks after my surgery. I immediately noted my hesitation when she said I could drive while wearing my foot boot. However, I did have to see my primary doctor two days later. My physical therapist- sister- chauffeur couldn’t drive me. So, I awkwardly climbed into my Suburban and told Jesus he better take the wheel…. and the foot pedal. Ironically, I was heading to my primary doctor to get my blood pressure checked. I quickly discovered pushing on the break pedal hurt my foot. Pressing too hard on the gas pedal hurt my foot, too. Thus, I decided my best bet was to coast when I could and drive the speed limit when I couldn’t. Interestingly, my blood pressure was perfect when I got to my doctor’s appointment. I was flummoxed. Could it be there is a direct correlation between exceeding the speed limit and having a higher blood pressure reading? Who really knows? I’m no Skytress scientist. But, you can bet when I go for my physical in July, I’ll be sure to ease on down the road.

My healing foot definitely knows that when it comes to easing on down the aisles in various stores, there is quite a discrepancy. In fact, I have foot noted there is a direct relationship between the economic savings in a store to their floor’s hardness. Yessiree. The floors at my local grocery store are premium quality. I swear I walk on gentle air as I walk the aisles to grab my premium priced groceries. My healing foot loves shopping at my local grocery store. Of course, I saved a wee bit more money the one time I went shopping at Target post surgery. However, the Target floors weren’t so kind on my booted foot. I affectionately called my shopping gait up and down the aisles as “the Target trudge”. I’ll admit. My heart loves shopping at Target. My healing foot doesn’t so much. Thus, I have yet to return to Target to go shopping. I was definitely cutting costs when I went shopping at Costco. And guess what? Costco was definitely cutting costs when they chose their flooring. Holy moly. When it comes to hard floors, Costco’s floors are the grand daddy of them all. Yes. My savings were considerable at Costco. But, so was my foot pain. If the truth be known, I bought less items at Costco just in case I needed to jump in the back of the buggy and have my sister push me around the building. Needless to say, I was definitely doing the walking boot-scootin’ boogie on my way to the car when I left Costco.

Finally, I’d like to note my pre-surgery foot plan of catching up on 34 years of very little Skytress sleep hasn’t come to fruition. Before surgery, I pictured myself and my bandaged foot tucked in my bed dreaming of my much anticipated summer flying adventures to Alaska. Post surgery, my reality was I was awkwardly trying to sleep on my back with my foot elevated on a stack of pillows. Heck. I didn’t even sleep under my covers. No siree. I tossed my duvet over me, plopped the ice machine pad over my bandaged foot and cranked the heating pad so it could soothe my aching back. You can only imagine my joy when I no longer had to elevate my foot, use the ice machine or heating pad. I once again had high hopes for some sweet Skytress slumber. But I had to hit the snooze button on this Skytress dream. Amazingly, my foot nerves decided to wake up. Again, I am no Skytress scientist. So this is my non-scientific term for what my foot nerves were doing. Sharp jolts of sporadic pain would traverses from my toes to my ankle. I’ll admit. I constantly marvel at how the body heals itself. But, egads. It got on my nerves that my foot nerves would wait until the middle of the night to wake up. I’d like to note, my pre- surgery recovery plan didn’t include me watching “Reba” reruns on the Hallmark Channel in the middle of the night. But, like my good neighbor… who I previously blogged about in my ideal neighborhood…Reba was there. Her show kept me entertained in the wee hours of the morning when I couldn’t sleep. A daily dose of Reba may not have been what my doctor ordered. But, it should be noted it was just what this patient needed.

I have high hopes I will be back flying in June. Hopefully, I’ll be flying to Alaska again this summer with my friends. I’d like to get some good flying in before I have surgery on my other foot. Say, what?! Oh yes. I guess that really is my last foot note to pass along to you my sweet friends. I have to have surgery on my left foot, too. Gee wiz. I think I’ll start making my Amazon list now. I feel some theme days coming up.

When I was a young Skytress I flew many trips with my Skytress friend, Kathryn. Skytress Kathryn was from Knoxville, Tennessee. I loved listening to Kathryn tell stories about growing up in Knoxville. I particularly loved when she talked about football Saturdays. Her family would take their boat to the University of Tennessee football games. They would tailgate on the Tennessee River with the other fans who took their boats to the game….and party from boat to boat until it was time to go to the game. I was fascinated. I went to the University of Kansas. We couldn’t take a boat to the football games. Heck. I even lived across the street from the Kansas football stadium. I don’t believe I ever saw anyone outside the stadium tailgating before the game. Then again, these were the very lean years for Kansas football. We only went to the games for something to do until basketball season started. “Wave the wheat” my Jayhawk friends! Well, I might not have taken a boat to Neyland Stadium in Tennessee a few weeks ago. But, I still manage to get inside. I’ll admit. I didn’t “wave the wheat” when I got inside the stadium. No siree. One doesn’t wave the wheat inside Neyland Stadium. Nope. One sings, “Good Old Rocky Top” with your Skytress crew. And you take pictures…. as proof you simply walked through an open construction doorway to get inside of the stadium to take them.

For years, when our airline crews had a layover in Knoxville we would walk to the hotel for our layover. The hotel was a couple hundred feet from the airport. It didn’t matter if we had a long or short Knoxville layover either. We would drag our bags down the sidewalk to the hotel. As far as I knew, the University of Tennessee was a million miles away….yet, still miraculously in Knoxville. So, when Skytress Cara texted me the morning of our 30- hour Knoxville layover, asking me if I would like to walk to the University, my response was, “Is it far? I hadn’t planned on walking a million miles on my layover. Skytress Cara texted me that it was less than a mile walk. I texted her back , “Meet you in the lobby in a few minutes.”

My original plan for my layover was to sleep in late then have a leisurely day walking around Knoxville. I planned to cap the day off by ordering dinner from Tupelo Honey. I’ll admit. I had been thinking about my layover plans for days. You may remember Ron passed away in Knoxville. It took me an abhorrent amount of time to be mentally ready to layover there again. Much to my amazement, when I finally mustered up the courage to layover in Knoxville, I had a perfectly lovely 30-hour layover. I’ll admit. I felt Ron’s love the entire time I was there. Yes indeed. I looked forward to spending this layover by myself enveloped again in Ron’s love. Curiously, I felt in my heart Ron was encouraging me to go hang out with my crew. I had a sneaky suspicion Ron knew I was going to have a splendid layover with them. I pictured Ron in Heaven smiling when the three of us exited the hotel. Skytress Cara, Skytress Molly and I were gobsmacked by the glorious weather. The weather was unlike the bitter cold weather the country had experienced from coast to coast a few days prior. Yessiree. It was warm and sunny…..and utterly refreshing. The slightly nippy temperatures Knoxville had experienced in the morning were long gone by the time we headed out on our adventure.

Skytress Cara was our designated tour guide for our adventure. She had visited the University of Tennessee during the peak of Covid. Skytress Cara and her family came to watch Texas A & M play the Volunteers. Skytress Cara lives in Austin. She and her family eat, drink and breathe everything Aggies. Having to social distance while at the football game didn’t deter them from coming to Tennessee to root on their Aggies. No siree. However, it had been a moment since Skytress Cara had been to the campus. Thus, it took her a moment to get her bearings straight. We knew we were headed in the right direction when we saw multiple campus parking lot signs. I’ll admit. We did let out a collective groan when we saw the steep hill we had to walk up to get to the main campus. But when we got to the top of the good old rocky top hill, we let out a collective gasp. It was heart stopping beautiful! Egads. I would have loved to have gone to school here. (Sorry my Kansas Jayhawk wheat waving friends). I always say Tennessee is one of the most beautiful states in America. The University of Tennessee was just another exclamation point to this statement.

Skytress Cara, Skytress Molly and I were by far the oldest people walking the campus. I’m certain most students believed we were three lost elderly ladies. And they wouldn’t have been too far off in their assumptions. Ahh, but, there are many advantages to being an older person on a young person’s campus. Yes indeed. We unabashedly used our mature age as an advantage a few minutes later. We decided to walk over to Neyland Stadium. There was a lot of construction work going on around the stadium. Luckily for us, the construction work that day was centered on the stadium’s exterior facing the Tennessee River. This bode well for us. Without hesitation we walked inside the stadium through an open construction gate on the main campus side of the stadium. Yessiree. We boldly walked in and looked around the stadium like we belonged there. No questions asked. I’m sure anyone that saw us thought we were just college administrators checking things out. However, our concocted back story was that we were with ESPN scouting a story on the Volunteer football team. Thankfully, we didn’t need a back story. Instead, we stood in the stadium singing, “Good Old Rocky Top” while we took pictures. When we left the stadium I told Skytress Cara and Skytress Molly about my neighbor who walked into the Super Bowl at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta when the Rams were playing. Yessiree. My neighbor saw several people easily walk through a stadium door after the game started. So, she and her cousin decided they would walk through the same door. No one stopped them. They blissfully walked around the stadium and cheered our St. Louis Rams on to victory. Even though there wasn’t an actual football game being played in Neyland Stadium when we walked in, we still felt as victorious. However, our victory was short lived. We eventually had to walk the gazillion steps back up to the main campus area from the Tennessee River side. However, before we did, I looked over at the Tennessee River and imagined all the boats tailgating before a UT football game. In my head it looked like an absolutely good old rocky top time.

Since there was very little any middle-aged person could possibly do on campus, we decided we would head back to downtown Knoxville. Yessiree. The three of us wanted to shop and have a late lunch. After all….We are Skytresses! As you should all know by now….eating and shopping are two favorite pastimes for airline people. Thankfully, we were unanimous in our decision to go to Tupelo Honey to eat. My meal was so delicious I actually tried to replicate it when I got home. We happily shopped before and after lunch. After all….We are Skytresses! We quickly discovered every shop had one thing in common. Tennessee orange! Good Old Rocky Top!. The three of us had never seen so much orange clothing or accessories in our lives. The crazier the orange outfits and accessories were, the more we liked them. In my head, I imagined Ron chuckling in Heaven at all the orange. This thought made me chuckle, too. Good golly. Ron was right. I was having a splendid time hanging out with Skytress Cara and Skytress Molly.

I was happily exhausted when I returned to my hotel room. It was the perfect layover to have before I started my vacation. I even told this to Ron after I said my bedtime prayers. I could hear Ron in Heaven saying, “Yepper. It was a great day wasn’t it, “I”?”. The next morning when we drove to the airport I thought a lot about Ron. I thanked God for allowing me to feel Ron’s love everywhere I went on my layover. It truly was a Heavenly gift that I didn’t take for granted.

A short time later I was having more conversations with God and Ron. Egads. We had a dreaded maintenance issue. Of course, we were supposed to finish our trip at a decent time in Atlanta. All of us, except for our Skytress In-Charge, Jazmin, were trying to catch early flights home. Skytress Jazmin was working her first trip since finding out she was pregnant. She spent the entire layover trying to catch up on sleep. She was looking forward to getting home early to get more rest. The maintenance issue was putting us all in a pickle. We felt awful for our passengers trying to catch connecting flights in Atlanta. So, we were in the aisles answering their questions and looking up flight information for them as best we could. While we were busy helping our passengers, God gave Ron and my angels in Reroute Heaven the go ahead to work their reroute magic. Boy did they! A few minutes later my phone rang. It was our airline calling with a crew notification. Our Cleveland turn had been removed from our rotation. We would be released to go home when we landed in Atlanta. We all were ecstatic. Skytress Jazmin would be back home resting in no time. Skytress Cara, Skytress Molly and I would be able to catch even earlier flights home. I don’t know about the other ladies. But, all the way home I was singing, “Good Old Rocky Top”. I knew Ron and my angels in Reroute Heaven were singing along with me, too. Heck. I even pictured them enthusiastically “waving the wheat” at their Heavenly reroute magic. I know I was!

A few weeks ago I went to my annual FAA re-qualification training in Atlanta. I spent the morning conducting 15 emergency evacuations on our numerous aircraft. I followed this fun-filled stress session with a hands-on life-saving medical class. Then we practiced subduing and handcuffing unsavory passengers. I’ll admit. This was more fun than stressful. In the afternoon session we were evaluated on how we managed a series of events that randomly occur on the aircraft. To help make things more stressful…I mean more fun….we were randomly picked for each event…and we didn’t know our event until it magically happened. Yippee!?! My event was a decompression during flight. Yessiree. My crew and I were in the aircraft mock-up pretending to serve our passengers when the oxygen masks dropped from the passenger service units. Heck. I couldn’t grab that oxygen mask fast enough and strap myself in an empty passenger seat. My crew and I shouted our commands for the passengers to do the same. “Grab a mask! Sit down. Stay calm!” We responded amazingly after the decompression, too. Yessiree. It was an Oscar worthy performance. Better yet, we passed our emergency scenario on the first attempt. Guess after 34 years on the airplane and a zillion safety videos under my belt, I definitely have mastered “ place your oxygen mask on yourself first before helping others”. Unfortunately off the airplane, I’m more of a, “do as I say, not as I do” kind of gal. I’ll put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. Yep. I help put their oxygen masks on long before I ever think about putting my own oxygen mask on. I was gently reminded of this fact a few weeks ago. Unfortunately, I experienced a medical hiccup with my health. My doctor calmly explained what steps I needed to take to correct my health situation. Yes he was calm. I was not. Mentally I was shouting at myself. “Grab a mask”. So, I did just that. I donned my own oxygen mask. Funny, I have been breathing much better ever since.

My medical hiccup started with my much anticipated bunion surgery. This surgery has been years in the making folks. Yessiree. My beautiful young Skytress feet fell victim to the old Skytress shoe requirement of high heels being worn at all times while in uniform, except for when we were actively in flight. It didn’t matter that I changed into my onboard flats more times than Mr. Roger could ever imagine humanly possible. No siree. My beautiful Skytress feet were no match for my uncomfortable pointy-toed Skytress high heels. Talk about the agony of defeat. Or should I say the agony of de-feet. My now ugly, painful bunion feet are a podiatrist’s dream. Most Skytress’ and Skyter’s feet are. Bad bunion feet is the stinky secret of our profession. Well, unless of course you know a Skytress or Skyter. We are constantly complaining about our feet…..and forever talking about needing foot surgery. So, I finally decided it was time to stop talking and….uh…put my foot down…wink, wink…and schedule my bunion surgery. I’ll admit. My foot doctor was very curious as to which foot I would choose to operate on first. Luckily for me, both feet are prime bunion surgery candidates. I decided to put my best… or rather…worst foot forward for the first bunion surgery. And that would be my right foot for all you curious foot doctors and blog readers.

My foot doctor sent me home with a medical form for my primary physician to fill out. I adore my primary physician. I was feeling great when I got to my doctor’s office. So, when his nurse said my blood pressure was high I thought it was a faulty blood pressure machine. So, did the nurse. So, she switched to the manual blood pressure cuff. My blood pressure was still very high. When my doctor came in the room he was aware of my blood pressure reading. He told me to imagine I was on a beach somewhere and he would take it again. Apparently I imagined I was on a beach in the middle of a nasty hurricane. My blood pressure was still high. My doctor listened to my heart. He said my heart sounded good. This made me feel much better since my primary physician is also a cardiologist. However, this feeling was short lived. My doctor told me he was sorry, but, he couldn’t sign off on my foot surgery. Instead he was going to put me on blood pressure medication. The he said I would need to come back in two weeks to see him. Egads. I made my appointment for the day after my annual FAA training. I figured my blood pressure would be back to normal by then. I knew, without a doubt, my doctor would sign my bunion surgery paperwork at my next appointment. However, since I only had two weeks to get my blood pressure down, I decided it would be advantageous for me to keep breathing through my oxygen mask.

Incredibly, after my first dose of medication I could tell a difference. My chest didn’t feel as tight. I was startled by how accustomed I had become to the dull pressure on my chest. Although I knew the medicine was working, I vowed I was going to make positive changes to get my blood pressure down and get off the medication. I’ll admit. I loathe being on any medication. Especially, blood pressure medication. In essence, The Rerouted Skytress needed a lifestyle reroute. It’s obvious I have to get my weight in check. Sadly, I have regained all the weight I lost the year before. Dang stress eating. The worst part is… I knew I was stress eating every time I reached for the food. Egads! It’s obvious I have to get more sleep, too. I know I am easily losing two days of sleep a week because of my flying and commuting schedule. I’m also very aware I’m staying up much too late writing my blog. Good golly. I can’t help that my best writing happens in the wee hours of the night. I know my blog is going to take a major blow with my new lifestyle changes. But, a gal has to do what a gal has to do to get her blood pressure down. I’ve also decided Facebook is going to take a backseat for a while…like the third-row backseat. Yessiree. I can mindlessly whittle away precious time on this site. My radical lifestyle change is that I’m striving to turn off all my electronic devices before 10pm…..or at least eight hours before my pickup time if I am on a trip. So, goodbye late night YouTube and Netflix marathon watching. Whew wee! Good thing I have my oxygen mask on. These changes can take one’s breath away.

As you know, change doesn’t happen over night. When I went back to my primary physician after two weeks, my blood pressure was even higher. I’m positive the stress from my FAA re-qualification training was still swirling through my blood from the day before. Anyhow, my doctor tweaked my medication and told me to come back in two weeks. Yippee!?! The next day I was in the crew lounge. Myself and my commuter friends were all gathered in a circle chitchatting. I told them my bunion surgery was now on pause since my hypertension needed to be addressed first. Now, I’ve always said if you can take one thing to a deserted island, take a Skytress or Skyter. They have everything you would ever need to survive. When I told my Skytress and Skyter friends I had gone on blood pressure medication they started pulling things out of their flight bags. These items were things they take daily for good blood pressure maintenance. I was gobsmacked. Which I know I shouldn’t have been. Considering my deserted island comment. I knew from talking to my friends they put their oxygen masks on themselves first whether it’s on the airplane or just in life. My friends were a wealth of information….and inspiration. I took screenshots and wrote down notes. Then I went on Amazon and purchased a few things. When I got home from my trip I started taking super beets and pineapple sea moss. I’ll admit. They sound disgusting. But, they are actually quite pleasant tasting….just like my friends promised me they would be. I have no proof that they helped lower my blood pressure. Heck. It could have been the combination of these items along with my medication. Oh, and the fact I went on vacation. But, low and behold my blood pressure was lower when I went back to see my doctor. He actually told me I was a very interesting person. Of course, I am! But, he meant my heart consistently skips one beat after a few regular beats. My doctor showed me my EKG and explained everything to me. He was fascinated. I was fascinated, too. I told my doctor that sometimes at night when I am lying in bed, I feel like the cogs aren’t perfectly matching up on my heart machinery. Now, I know why. I’ll admit. My heart did skip a happy beat when my doctor finally signed my bunion surgery paperwork. I breathed a sigh of relief through my oxygen mask, too.

I’ll admit. Donning my own oxygen mask in my everyday life has taken some getting used to. After all, I’m used to multitasking,….while I’m multitasking. However, I’m forcing myself to slow down these days. Heck. I’ve even taken a few naps. I never made time for naps. My friend, Kristin, who I went through Skytress training with, told me she heard that each year of flying is like putting your body through childbirth. I had never heard this before. But, it definitely made me laugh. And laughter is great for lowering your blood pressure. This I do know! I also know my bunion surgery is now scheduled for March 13th. Yippee! I can’t wait. I especially can’t wait to see my doctor and anesthesiologist reactions when I arrive at the surgery center. Yessiree. I will already have donned my oxygen mask and will be breathing easy.

Sometimes work is…work. But, if we are lucky…sometimes work is a mini-vacation. Yessiree. Airline people are notorious for saying they are on a paid dream vacation when they fly a trip that has a long layover in a fun city. Fortunately for me, I had two paid dream vacations before my actual vacations. Even better, I got paid by my airline to go home to Montana. Yipeee for me! I’d have gone for free. But, please don’t tell this to anyone in the payroll department.

I specifically bid a long Kalispell layover before my November vacation. Our crews now layover in the charming town of Whitefish, Montana. I had a brief taste of Whitefish when my crew and I drove there on a previous Kalispell layover. Yessiree. We made a side trip to Whitefish so I could get my Christmas ornaments before we drove to Glacier National Park. I vowed then I would drive back to Whitefish on an another layover to explore the downtown area more thoroughly. I’ll admit. It was pure serendipity when I learned our layover hotel was now located in Whitefish. Heck. I didn’t have to rent a car. No siree. I could roll out of my hotel bed and be walking down Central Avenue in a matter of minutes. Barring a reroute, I knew nothing could spoil my plans for a spectacular paid dream vacation. Unfortunately, one Skytress on my crew did her due diligence to try to ruin my plans for a spectacular trip. I couldn’t tell if she was consciously or subconsciously doing it though. However, from our first interaction, I could tell she was not thrilled I didn’t drop my trip to her much junior Skytress friend. They wanted to spend the long layover watching football at a local bar with another Skytress on our crew. She smiled when she told me this. But, she said it with a snarky undertone to make it perfectly clear I had ruined her layover plan. She did consciously tell us how much she loathes domestic flying. Yessiree. Every time I was within earshot she voiced her displeasure with domestic trips. By my rough calculation on day one of our trip, this comment was stated one thousand, six hundred and forty-two times. Give or take a few times. For those of you who don’t fly for a living,….there is nothing worse than a Skytress or Skyter bashings domestic trips now that they are senior enough to fly international trips on a regular basis. On the upside, there is a very good chance we will never see these Skytresses and Skyters ever again on a domestic trip. Hooray for domestic us!

Luckily for me, I had flown with our Skytress In-Charge, Amanda, before. Better yet, Skytress Amanda had no intention of spending her day in Montana watching football in a bar. No siree. She was just as eager to explore Whitefish as I was. Boy, did we explore! We walked into every shop that was open on Central Avenue on a Sunday. One shop we returned to several times. Once for Skytress Amanda to try on some clothes she couldn’t stop thinking about. Once again later to find my wallet I had carelessly placed on a stack of sweaters. There were so many fun and interesting items in the various shops I found myself thoroughly overwhelmed. Which was a good thing. Being overwhelmed helped me from over spending. I’ll admit. I did have a game plan for buying early Christmas gifts on our layover. Sadly, I didn’t implement this plan too well. No siree. I ended up buying more things for me than the people on my Christmas list. Not surprisingly, several shops were completely out of my price range. These shops were definitely catering to the wealthier patrons. The prices of some of the items were so outlandishly high I got a bad case of sticker giggles. One boutique that was closed definitely catered to….well, not the likes of me. The clothing on the mannequins in the window was glam beyond glam. The clothing was more Rodeo Drive than rodeo Montana. The juxtaposition was not lost on Skytress Amanda and me. Yessiree. It completely intrigued us. I promised myself if I got another Kalispell layover in December, I would come back to this shop just to window gawk. Thankfully for me, I was able to fulfill this promise.

My crew on my December Kalispell trip couldn’t have been more wonderful. Everyone was beyond excited to go to Montana. Each one of us was completely aware we were on an airline paid dream vacation. So, we all acted accordingly and made some dreamy layover plans. Skytress Derby had rented a car to drive to Glacier. Our Skytress In-Charge, Brenda, and her friend went snowmobiling after they received the official word there was enough snow to do so. Skytress Rachel and I had plans to go shopping in Whitefish and enjoy the Christmas atmosphere. Lucky for us, Mother Nature provided the perfect amount of snow to add to the Christmas mood. Yessiree. I was giddy beyond words. Everything seemed so magical. Unlike my previous trip, ….I was no longer so overwhelmed by all the incredible items in the various shops that it completely stopped me from over spending. No siree. In fact, I had to continuously remind myself I had very little room in my suitcase to bring things home with me. Sad, I know! Believe me,…if I knew the whimsical Christmas reindeer wall sculpture I saw in the first shop would have fit in my suitcase,….I would have bought it in a heartbeat. Luckily, for me, this florist shop was closed on my last layover. Otherwise, I would have been sufficiently prepared to bring the reindeer home with me. Skytress Rachel and I also went into an amazing art gallery that was closed last time I was in Whitefish. I quickly fell in love with a colorful bear painting as soon as I opened the gallery door. I would have happily brought this painting home with me, too. Only it was too enormous to be properly displayed on any of the walls in my house. Plus, it was a little over $13,000. Besides that, it was perfect. We also walked by the clothing boutique that I vowed to return to on my last layover….you know… to window gawk. The outfits in the window had changed from my previous window gawking. However, each new outfit displayed in the window was still on the cutting edge of fashion. Skytress Rachel and I looked inside the door as we passed. We were stunned by what we saw. There was a red ball gown with a full skirt made out of huge red bows on a mannequin. I was completely gobsmacked. It was creatively amazing! Unbeknownst to us, the shop owner saw us looking inside. She came outside as we were walking away and invited us to come in to the shop to take pictures. Why I declined, I have no idea. I utterly regret this decision now. I researched the shop when I got back to my hotel room. The boutique has replaced the gift shop where I got my Christmas ornaments on my first Kalispell layover. The shop is now called, House of Skye. The owner, Skye Drynan, is from Whitefish. Her family owned the gift shop I bought my ornaments from. Ms. Drynan designs artistic clothing. Some of her celebrity clients are Gwen Steffani, Lady Gaga and Carrie Underwood. Say, what?!?!? I know! You can bet your sweet bippy next time I’m in Whitefish, House of Skye will be the first place I will visit. I vow to walk into the House of Skye and proudly tell Ms. Drynan to, “Show me what you’ve got”. I know I won’t be disappointed. Heck. I encourage you all to do the same.

Skytress Rachel and I eventually went to grab a burger and watch some of the Georgia-Alabama football game. We needed a moment to decompress from our fairy tale day. That’s when we started receiving texts and photos from the rest of our crew. Their photos were phenomenal. Everyone was having a blast in Montana. I couldn’t have been happier or more Montana proud. Yessiree. Everyone was having big adventures in Big Sky country. I couldn’t wait to hear everyone’s stories. I could tell from the photos and texts, they couldn’t wait to tell us all about their adventures, too.

Not surprisingly, on my November Kalispell layover, our international Skytress couldn’t wait for our trip to be over. She yearned to go back to her international flying. I’ll admit. After a lovely layover back home in Montana, I was counting the minutes for our trip to end, too. Yessiree. International Skytress had mentally worn me down. Fortunately, this was not the case on my December trip. No siree. From the moment we met in the lobby to head to the airport, everyone was happily reliving their Montana memories. Even our new pilot crew was excited to share what they did on their layover. The positive energy was palpable. I know I wasn’t the only one planning my next trip back to Montana. My crew had provided me with a new list of adventures to experience on my next layover. I’ll admit. I was sad our trip was coming to an end. I could tell my crew felt the same way I did. Our paid dream vacation trip exceeded all expectations. By my rough calculations we had each created one thousand, six hundred and forty-two personal Montana memories. Give or take a few memories. I’m certain we all would have flown the trip for free based on our exceptional layover experiences. But, please don’t tell anyone in the payroll department. Montana memories are priceless. But, if I ever want to purchase the $13,000 bear painting, I’ll need to get paid for my trip.