Kansas City Here I Come

Last week I had a 30- hour layover in Kansas City. Our trip first started with us flying from Atlanta to Los Angeles. Then after a sit we flew from Los Angeles to Kansas City. Our flight landed in Kansas at midnight. We only had a smattering of passengers going with us to Kansas City. I’ll admit. It was delightful! Everyone had optimal elbow room. I remember years ago we used to have flights from Dallas to Kansas City. These flights were always full. One day a Skytress I was flying with wondered out loud why so many people traveled from Dallas to Kansas City. Without missing a beat a first-class passenger said, “For the cheap women and good barbecue”. It’s still one of my favorite responses to a question. The upbeat song lyric, “I’m going to Kansas City. Kansas City here I come”, takes on a whole new connotation after hearing this response.

One of my favorite Skytress stories to tell, also, happened on our way to Kansas City. It actually happened on our final approach. Our Skytress In-Charge started to make her final approach PA. I was handing the gentleman in 3C his coat when I heard over the PA, “We are making our final approach into Kansas Sh*ty”. I giggled as I looked at the gentleman and asked him, “Did she just say what I think she said?” He said, “Yes”. Followed by, “Some days it really is!” His response tickled me. I cannot even tell you the number of times I jokingly say I am going to “Kansas Sh*ty”. I say it so often I fear I will actually say it over the PA just like my Skytress In-Charge did. However, I know if I do say it, I will immediately follow it up with, “Sorry folks. However, the gentleman in 3C told me years ago…Some days it really is!”

This trip our layover hotel was located in the Downtown District. It’s a nice area. But, it isn’t Country Club Plaza. Ah, Country Club Plaza! I’ve loved Country Club Plaza since I was a student at the University of Kansas. However, when I went to the University of Kansas I was a poor college student. So mostly we drove to Country Club Plaza to see the Christmas lights. When I became a Skytress I had a salary. So I went shopping at Country Club Plaza. After all, shopping is one of the most coveted Skytress pastimes. Amazingly, I actually spent most of my Skytress money up the hill from Country Club Plaza. Yessiree. If it weren’t for a fellow Skytress on one of my trips, I would never have known there was a hidden gem up the hill from Country Club Plaza. Thankfully, this Skytress had an obsession with Trapp Candles. I clearly remember we were in the crew van on our way to the hotel when the Skytress asked us if we saw the sign on the building that said “Trapp and Company”. Of course, the three of us were too busy talking to have noticed any signs. Yessiree. Talking is another favorite pastime of Skytresses. The Skytress educated us on Trapp Candles the rest of the way to the hotel. We were intrigued. So intrigued, that we all agreed to walk up to the hill with her before we headed to Country Club Plaza to shop.

Now there have been numerous times in my Skytress career when I have won the shopping lottery. This day was definitely one of them. This shop was a Skytress paradise. It was a florist shop. It was a gift shop. It was a wine shop. It was a candle shop. It was a design center. All under one roof. It was Skytress Heaven. Every item sang to my Skytress heart. Best of all, the owner insisted we taste a plethora of gourmet items he sold in his shop. I kid you not. We spent an hour and a half in Trapp and Company. I left with bags filled with food items, gifts and of course, Trapp Candles. I had never heard of Trapp Candles before this day. But, by golly, by the time I left the shop I was a Trapp Candle convert. All of bought so many things at Trapp and Company we had to stop at the hotel and drop our things off before we finally headed to Country Club Plaza. Where, of course, we continued to spend more of our Skytress money.

Holy Smokes….I need to clean my Trapp Candle

Sadly, there is a lack of Skytress paradise shops around our layover hotel in the Downtown District. But, fear not. There is an upscale market a few blocks from the hotel. So, this layover I headed down to Consentino’s Market where I proceeded to spend my Skytress money on a healthy salad. What!? No barbecue!? Everyone knows Kansas Sh*ty is known for their cheap women and good barbecue!!! I know. A healthy salad sounds pretty boring for a 30-hour Kansas Sh*ty layover. And it is. But, if you heard my motivational pep talk I gave myself just to get dressed and walk outside into the bitter cold you would have been impressed. Heck, I was extremely impressed! So, I headed out into the bitter cold to get the best darn healthy salad I could find.

My game plan was to walk quickly to Consentino’s Market and walk back even quicker to the hotel. I’ll admit. I couldn’t walk fast enough to the market. The wind whipped around the buildings so badly I questioned my sanity for ever leaving the hotel…..for a salad. Yes. My salad paled in comparison to the tantalizing items for sale in the prepared food section. But, I was sticking to my healthy food plan. I did circle the dessert area several times as I clung to my salad box. When I finally checked out the sales clerk entertained me with an impromptu comedy routine. It was so bad it was actually funny. I’m sure I’ll see him some day on Netflix when he has his own comedy special. I’ll know it’s him if he does food market jokes. Well, well. A salad and a comedy show. Could I have ask for anything more on a layover? Yes. Yes, I could have.

Time to salad shop
Hold on to your salad…there’s three more sides to the dessert section

I’m not going to lie. If we were still laying over at Country Club Plaza I would have been outside in the bitter cold happily shopping all day at all the Skytress paradise shops. Heck. Nothing warms a Skytress’ heart like power shopping. Yessiree. Other people can have the cheap women and good barbecue while in Kansas Sh*ty. For me, it’s all about Country Club Plaza. My apologies to Consentino’s Market. You are a lovely market. However, you are just one market. Country Club Plaza has fifteen blocks of shops and restaurants. Plus, there is Trapp and Company up the hill. I’m sure they miss me as much as I miss them. Yessiree. I pray we eventually go back to this area of the city. When we do, you can bet I’ll wholeheartedly bid these trips. All the while, I’ll be singing….”I’m going to Kansas City. Kansas City here I come.”

The Power Of The Heavenly Pennies

Happy New Year my sweet friends. I am finishing up my first trip of 2022. Actually, I’m currently on the airplane in LaGuardia deadheading back to Atlanta. However, I should be working a flight from Indianapolis to Atlanta instead. What happened you ask? Well, the Rerouted Skytress….got rerouted. (Insert drum rimshot here. Badum-Ching). Don’t feel too bad for me, though. I am sitting in a first class seat as I type away on my iPad. Even better, I don’t have anyone in the seat next to me. Still, I would have preferred to have flown my trip as it was planned. I would have landed back home in St. Louis at 2pm. Now I will land in St. Louis at 1940….that would be 7:40 pm for those of you that don’t adhere to military time. I’m actually shocked it took this long into my trip to get rerouted. The winter weather and the Omicron Covid variant have wreaked havoc on our airline crew staffing. I’m anticipating the rest of my trips this month will include a reroute or two or five. Yes, I’ll be airborne. I’m just not sure what city I’ll be heading to. If you are lucky, I may just be heading to your city.

I see you New York…from my first-class seat

Speaking of…or rather, writing of luck. I was extremely lucky when I flew to Atlanta to start my trip. For those of you that follow me on Facebook and Instagram, you already know about Ron sending me pennies from Heaven. Let me explain for those of you that don’t follow me on social media. I had been on vacation for almost a month. I’ll admit. I still wasn’t quite ready to go back flying. As I stood in the bitter cold waiting for the employee shuttle to come, I talked to Ron in Heaven. This wasn’t unusual. I talk to Ron and my Dad in Heaven all the time. I jokingly told Ron a penny from Heaven would make going back to work more palatable. As the employee shuttle approached, I told both Ron and my Dad to have a heavenly day in Heaven. This always makes me smile when I tell them this. I passed the USO Military lounge on my way to my gate. I said a a prayer of thanks for the soldier’s like I normally do. Then I turned the corner to head towards the Known Crew Member security line. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I spied a shiny penny on the floor as I was making the turn. Two passengers saw me pick up my penny from Heaven and they smiled. I put my penny from Heaven in my left coat pocket. It happily joined the penny that was already in my left coat pocket. This penny is a penny from my Dad in Heaven. It’s been in the finger of my winter glove for years now. The day I found the penny I placed it inside my left coat pocket. The penny slid into the finger of my glove when I placed it inside my pocket. I haven’t taken the penny out of the glove since that day. I like to put my hand in my pocket and feel the penny nestled inside the finger of the glove. There is no doubt about it. It brings me great comfort when I touch the penny. I fiddled with both pennies in my pocket as I walked up to the TSA agent. The combined power of the two pennies was evident. I made it through the KCM security line without becoming “ the selectee”. You see. The TSA agent’s computer randomly picks the selectee. Sadly, the selectee has to go back and go through the regular passenger security line. Not being the selectee is huge in our world of aviation. Of course, I thanked both Ron and my Dad for their powerful pennies after I safely passed through KCM and headed to my gate.

You can’t see my Dad’s penny from Heaven in my glove….you have to feel it

Later in the day I was walking through the concourse with my fellow Skytress. I was happily thinking about Ron’s penny from Heaven as I rubbed it in my pocket. I joked to Ron that it would be amazing to get another penny from him. After all, three pennies in my pocket would be perfect. I kid you not. I walked five feet down the concourse and low and behold there was another penny on the floor. I picked it up and told my fellow Skytress that this was the second penny I found that day. She commented that someone was busy sending me pennies from Heaven. Yes indeed. Ron was obviously having fun showering me with pennies from Heaven on my first trip of 2022. Lucky me!

The next day my crew and I had a three hour sit in Detroit. We decided we would go to the crew lounge for a wee bit. Heck, we had to walk by the lounge anyway. It couldn’t have been more convenient for us. Shockingly, I found another penny after we exited the crew elevator. The lone penny was sitting on the ground next to a deserted cart in the hallway. Wow! I texted my friend Kristin later in the day about my three pennies. We marveled at the coincidence of me finding them. We agreed the pennies definitely came from Heaven. I couldn’t tell you the last time I used change. Heck, I rarely see anyone use change these days. Sure, these pennies could have fallen out of someone’s pocket. However, I am convinced that they didn’t. No siree bob. These lucky pennies definitely came from Heaven. Better yet. From the moment I found them, the pennies worked their powerful magic. Case in point. No one on my crew had to get off the trip because of the omicron variant. Egads. Believe me. The stories are rampant of crew members having to get off their trips and quarantine in hotels. Shall we talk about reroutes? Let’s. It seems if you wear a crew uniform you’re going to be rerouted. For two days those lucky pennies from Heaven worked their incredible non-reroute magic.

I thought the luck of my pennies was waining on day two of my trip. I was in my hotel room in Tampa checking in for my flight home to St. Louis. I had just looked at my seat assignment for my flight. It was a window seat. My favorite. Then my phone rang. I didn’t want to answer it. No siree bob. I knew we were being rerouted. My airline doesn’t call in the evening just to wish me a good night’s sleep. I listened to the message. The computer voice said we would be flying to Atlanta an hour later than scheduled. It didn’t say anything more after that. Not one word. Usually the computer states the flight times and destinations for the rest of the trip. The recording always ends by telling us to check our full rotation on-line. I heard none of this. Apparently the computer didn’t want to give me the ugly details that we would be flying to LaGuardia and deadheading back to Atlanta. But, I saw it when I got on-line. Yessiree. Even though the computer didn’t remind me to check my rotation on-line, I did it anyway. I did find some solace in the fact that the passenger loads were light flying into and out of New York. Ahhh. My heavenly pennies still had luck inside them.

Light load flying to LaGuardia enabled me to see this beautiful view outside. Thank you lucky pennies from Heaven

This morning at pickup I learned that two of my fellow Skytresses had been rerouted one more time. They were going to fly to Detroit after we arrived in LaGuardia. Then they were going to deadhead to Atlanta. I thanked my lucky pennies I wasn’t going to Detroit, too.

There was a direct flight from LaGuardia to St. Louis that would have gotten me home hours early than 1940…uh, 7:40 pm for your civilians. There was also a direct flight from LaGuardia to Houston for my fellow Skytress that wasn’t rerouted to Detroit with the other two Skytresses. Sadly, neither one of us could deviate from our deadhead. Crew scheduling wasn’t authorizing it because we are so short on Skytresses and Skyters. I briefly thought about deviating without permission from crew scheduling. I was pretty confident I wasn’t going to be rerouted again. But, I am not only a rules follower,….I’m a scaredy-cat. Well, at least when my job could be on the line, that is. So here I sit on my deadhead flight back to Atlanta.

I had originally planned to start taking Christmas down when I got home this afternoon. However, I knew I needed to work on this blog post, too. I hadn’t even typed one word until a few minutes ago. Egads. I’ve usually written most of my blog before now. So, I guess my lucky pennies are still working their magic. I have enjoyed my peace and quiet writing while on my deadhead flight. Heck. I even have time to fit in a well-deserved nap. Yessiree. All naps are well-deserved. I do have to hang out a few hours in the crew lounge before I head up for my flight home to St. Louis. I’ll eat the last of my fruit and veggies while I wait. I’ll catch up on my YouTube watching, too. You know I have a few new sites I’m addicted to. On the plus side, I don’t have to make dinner tonight. And my family gets one more day to enjoy the Christmas decorations.

When I get home I will place Ron’s pennies from Heaven in my penny jar. I’ll keep my Dad’s penny in my glove in my coat. After all, it’s found a comfy home sweet home there in the finger of my glove. More importantly, it’s found a home sweet home in my heart knowing it’s a Heavenly penny from my Dad. Next Tuesday I will ask Ron for more pennies from Heaven. I anticipate the next few weeks being hard on us flight crews. Pennies from Heaven will be greatly appreciated. I won’t worry if I don’t receive any though. I always tell people that Ron works in reroute Heaven. He has been diligently working in the reroute Heaven department since my first trip back flying without him. My Skytress friend Kristin can attest to this. She and I couldn’t believe our heavenly fortune on this reroute. Only an angel familiar with aviation could have pulled off this miraculous reroute. Yessiree. Ron is a dedicated angel. He has gotten this Rerouted Skytress some pretty sweet reroutes. I know he will continue to take special care of his favorite Rerouted Skytress. Oh, yes. I can bet my Heavenly pennies on this!

My three heavenly pennies from Ron….this week

That’s A Wrap

Whew! I have no idea where 2021 went. But, the last three months flew by faster than a Skytress running through the airport trying to catch her flight home. This time last year most people were relieved to see 2020 end and 2021 begin. Ironically, most people are now ready to wrap up 2021. For many, it was pretty much a replay of 2020. Minus the toilet paper hoarding. I don’t know if you all were like me this year. Half the time I couldn’t remember if we were in 2020, 2021 or 2022. I blame the Olympics on some of this confusion. After all, the 2020 Olympics were in 2021. I blame my aging mind on the other part of the confusion. I can best describe 2021 as a quirky year. It was a year we were all trying to get back to a normal life. Yes. Some things went back to normal. Yessiree. I took toilet paper for granted once again. I’ll admit. It’s a small victory for normalcy. A victory nonetheless. Ah, there’s that sunny Skytress optimism! Yes, 2021 may have been a slightly better version of 2020. However, my hopes for 2022 are sky high. I’d venture to say at least 37,000 feet high. Heck. You don’t have to be in aviation to know that’s pretty high hopes. Maybe I shouldn’t say, “hopes”. It’s more of a relentless positive feeling God has placed in my Skytress heart. I know there may be a few unavoidable reroutes in 2022. Heck. I wouldn’t be The Rerouted Skytress without them. Still, I have a very glorious feeling about 2022. Yessiree, bob. I can’t wait for 2022 to take flight. Lucky for me, it’s merely days away. What an uplifting thought!

As my family can attest, I have spent most of the last quarter of 2021 on vacation. Fortunately, for them I did fly a few trips here and there. Thus, I haven’t been completely off the airline radar as it pertains to airline announcements. I actually have uplifting news to report about our airline. I know I told you all that our airline was planning to hire 3000 new Skytresses and Skyters. Well, I’m ecstatic to report we are going to hire 4500 new Skytresse and Skyters. It may just be a coincidence that our company decided to hire more Skytresses and Skyters after I went out on all my vacation. But, I don’t see it this way at all. No siree bob. It’s simple Skytress math. One Reroutes Skyress goes on vacation. (That would be me). My airline then decides to hire 1500 more Skytresses and Skyters. Clearly, I do the work of 1500 people! Skytress math is undeniable.

To be honest, it wasn’t all work and no play when I did fly my few trips at the end of 2021. After all, I am a Skytress! We live for our layovers. Fortunately, the reroute gods were very kind to me the last few weeks of 2021. They didn’t reek havoc on my layover plans. Crazy. I know. I was able to see my lovely friend Kristin on my Minneapolis layover in November. You may remember Kristin and I went through Skytress training together. Then we spent the best part of her Skytress career flying together in Cincinnati. At least I hope it was the best part of her flying career! Before I left for my December vacation I was able to visit with my best friend Tara and her mother, Mary. Yes. THE Mary who got me into this Skytress gig 32 years ago. We had a delightful lunch in Annapolis on my long Baltimore layover. It was a treat for my heart and soul to be able to see them. I can feel it in my bones that 2022 is going to be filled with more visits with friends that I haven’t seen since pre-Covid days. I promise to post pictures. First, though, I have to replace my phone with it’s broken camera. Unfortunately, my phone went airborne a few times in 2021 and landed like a Boeing 737 touching down in Key West. For those of you who have never flown into Key West, my phone landed abruptly and shockingly hard on the ground. For those of you that have landed in Key West,…you’re welcome for this unexpected chuckle.

Here’s something else I hope will make you smile. I’m wrapping up 2021 a little lighter than I started it. Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia! Yessiree. I started an eating regimen in November that seems to be working for me. Amazingly, I can also have treats if I factor them into my eating plan. I’m not going to lie. I did factored them into my Christmas eating plan. I’ll admit. I ate more treats than I initially factored in my Christmas eating plan. I tell you, Skytress math can be very complicated at times. Ultimately, it all added up to a very merry Christmas for me. That was until I stepped back on the scale and got a slight reality check. Fortunately, it wasn’t a bad reality check. Oh well. Such is life at Christmas. I’m happy to report today the scale started going back in the right direction. I’m hopeful I will continue to lose more weight in 2022. I’d like not to have to lie on my driver’s license the next time I go to renew it.

I’m sure many of you are not aware that the rodeo season and the coverage on the Cowboy Channel wrapped up a few weeks ago. Yes. Sadly it did. Well, sadly for me, I should say. Thank goodness I still have the Hallmark Channel to watch. Heck. Not only do I have the Hallmark Channel, I’ve been wrapping up 2021 by expanding my viewing choices. Say what!? I know. Skytresses can be so adventurous. Skytresses also love to share, too. So let me share. I’ve been watching Garden Answer, Wyse Guide, and the Impatient Gardener on Instagram and YouTube. They collectively have renewed my creative passions on multiple levels. Truth be told, the Wyse Guide is responsible for some of my Christmas eating plan going awry. His peanut butter balls and chocolate waffle cookies are dangerously addictive. I don’t want to brag. But, thanks to my new YouTube and Instagram friends, I already have items bought and ideas ready for decorating for Christmas 2022. Heck. I don’t think Santa’s elves have thought this far ahead. Fortunately, I know Santa’s elves read my blog. I’m positive they will check out these Instagram sites and YouTube channels and will be inspired just like me. I’m positive they will be huge fans of the peanut butter balls and chocolate waffle cookies, too.

I’m definitely enthusiastic about 2022. Yessiree. I am going to ring in the new year with passionate positivity. First, though, I am wrapping up 2021 this week and thanking it for all for all the gifts it has given me. I definitely learned a lot about myself in 2021. I learned to be more resilient and patient. I learned how to adapted and pivoted when it was necessary. Believe me. There were many times it was necessary. I learned to renew my spirit and forge ahead with life particularly when it wasn’t the easiest thing to do. I learned once again in 2021 that change can be inspirational and refreshing. I reminded myself many days throughout 2021 that I am in charge of my happy meter. So, I’ve upped my sunny Skytress optimism to sky high levels as I head into 2022. In the new year I’m making a conscious choice to actively see all the glorious things God has placed before me. My heart and soul are humming with anticipation of all the wonderment I will experience in 2022. I have a sneaky suspicion I will not only amaze myself in 2022, but, I will amaze everyone. Yessiree. This Rerouted Skytress is ready to soar in 2022. It’s going to be exhilarating. In the infamous words of my beloved Ronald, “Let’s have a great trip.” Okay. Let’s!!!!

Oh My Ornaments

If you have been reading my blog for awhile, you know I collect Christmas ornaments from cities I have traveled to. I do have some criteria that must be met in order for me to purchase an ornament. I must have had a wonderful time in the city. There, also, must be an ornament available for me to purchase when I am out an about in the city. I know this may sound crazy, but, ornaments aren’t always readily available at all times of the year. I have a list of cities I need to purchase ornaments from on return visits. The hunt for the ornaments creates added memories for me. When I hang my cherished ornaments on our Christmas tree and garland, the merriest memories come flooding back to me. In the spirit of Christmas, I’d like to share some of my special ornaments with you. You can imagine after 32 years of being a Skytress I have quite a few ornaments. Sadly, I can’t show you them all in this blog post. Instead, I will make it a Christmas tradition each year to share a few of my treasured ornaments with you. Merry Christmas.

Some days the tree lights are clear. Some days the tree lights are colored. I love Christmas tree technology.
I love to put some ornaments in the garland on the fireplace
I think of my Dad every time I place this ornament on my garland. I got this ornament when we flew to London for a few days.
This ornament came from Ireland when my Mom and I traveled there. It says Merry Christmas in Gaelic. I used to give my crews these bell ornaments and Shamrock bell ornaments from Ireland for Christmas gifts.
It’s a Paden pair. The horse ornament came from my trip to Louisville with Ron. The McGuire’s plaid stocking ornament came from Pensacola when Ron’s Dad, Papa Ed, came on our trip.
I’ve been blessed to have traveled to all 50 states. I place my ornament from Alaska up high on our tree. Not because Alaska is our most northern state. No. I place my ornament up high in our tree because my dog, Finley, loves this ornament as much as I do.
Hello my sweet friends. Welcome to Montana. My home state. My ornament isn’t from Butte. But, it still looks outside at the big sky.
Captain Pilot and I drove from Phoenix to Sedona before Christmas. I got this ornament of Kokopelli on our trip. We affectionately called him Cocoa Puffs because we couldn’t remember the name, Kokopelli.
I used to fly with a pilot in Cincinnati that flew hot air balloons in Albuquerque. He wore a hot air balloon tie tack on his uniform tie. So, of course, I had to buy a hot air balloon ornament when I went to Albuquerque.
This is my latest ornament I bought. I got it when my Skytress friend Darnell and I went to The Peabody Hotel in Memphis to watch the duck march. The ducks were priceless. The ornament was not. It’s one of the most expensive ornaments I’ve ever bought. I read the ducks live in a Royal Duck Palace on the hotel’s rooftop. The palace cost $200,000. It is made of marble and glass….has a duck spitting water fountain…and a replica of the Peabody Hotel where the ducks can nest in the grassy yard of the hotel. Now I understand why the ornament cost so much. Ho-Ho-Ho! This little duck ornament will nest in our tree all Christmas long. Merry Christmas, you lucky duck.

Taco Bell Fares

Some of the best memories I have of flying occurred during the holidays when I was a new Skytress. I know I told you all about flying with my dear friend, Jennie Lou, at Christmastime. Those memories, along with the memories of my first Christmas flying when my crew joined our friends and family on Christmas Eve, are priceless. I’m not going to lie though. Some of my most favorite holiday memories are the memories of flying when the airplanes were empty on Christmas Day. Okay. I lied. The airplanes weren’t completely empty. No siree bob. Usually on our flights we had airline employees and their families trying to get to their Christmas destinations. Occasionally, a crew member would have their family tagging along on our trip. Of course, everyone was in a festive mood. Heck. Most of the airplane seats were still empty. It was as if we were working a Christmas charter flight. A charter flight for friends and family. No employee or family member was left behind. Yessiree. The stress of flying on stand-by status was completely absent. I cherish these memories even more now that our airplanes are filled with holiday travelers. Ah, yes. The holiday traveler who travels on Christmas. Bah humbug to the airline executive who decided passengers flying on the holiday would be a marvelous thing. I’ll admit. It was a great financial decision for our airline. However, it wasn’t such a great decision for those of us actually working on the holiday. Yessiree. Bah humbug! I remember the year working on Christmas Day changed. Our airline decided they would discount the airfares on Christmas Day to entice people to fly. Boy, did they! People came out in droves. Our passengers couldn’t get enough of the holiday fares. Ho. Ho. Ho. Holiday fares. That’s not what we called them. No siree bob. We called them the Taco Bell fares. Now, everyone knows too much of Taco Bell isn’t always a good thing. Well, the same could be said for the Taco Bell airfares. The airline employees working on Christmas Day discovered this fact rather quickly. Yessiree. An excess of Taco Bell airfares on one day was definitely a hard thing to digest.

Taco Bell once had an ad campaign advertising a person could buy an inexpensive meal for the very low price of either 39 or 49 cents. If you were feeling famished you could splurge on the 59 cent meal. The Taco Bell commercials and print advertisements were everywhere. People who weren’t particularly a fan of Taco Bell, were definitely fans of the 39, 49 and 59 cent meals. In the past, our passenger weren’t particularly fans of our Christmas Day airfares. The fares were typically the same price as the airfares the days prior to and after the holiday. However, that all changed with the Taco Bell airline airfares. A few days prior to Christmas, our airline decided to offer the deeply discounted Christmas Day airfares. Just like Taco Bell, our airline offered several options for our passengers to choose from to satisfy their flying appetites. To say I was flabbergasted when I arrived at the airport that Christmas Day, would be an understatement. Ho. Ho. Ho-ly moly. I was in Santa Shock! The airport was as busy as the North Pole is just before Santa gets airborne. I was still in Santa Shock when my crew and I walked up to our gate. Our gate agent could see the disbelief on all our faces. Before anyone of us could say anything, he whispered to us, “Welcome to to Taco Bell. We can send you anywhere for 39, 49, or 59 dollars. Just pick a fare.” Well, it seemed everyone in the gatehouse had picked a Taco Bell Fare. Sadly my dear readers, Christmas Day flying hasn’t been the same ever since. Bah humbug!

If the Grinch and Ebenezer Scrooge had conspired together that Christmas, I wouldn’t have been surprised. Passengers were beyond Christmas crabby. Amazingly, each passenger figured they would be the only smart travelers taking advantage of the Taco Bell airfares. Ho. Ho. Ho. Just like us, they figured no one would be flying on Christmas Day. Scrooge and the Grinch would have been elated. The holiday spirit was gone. Yessiree. Our merry, festive Christmas Day passengers were replaced by irritated and agitated Christmas Day passengers. People who normally slept in on Christmas morning were now trying to sleep on a crowded airplane. People who normally spent Christmas morning opening up Christmas gifts were now schlepping their gifts across the country to open them up later that day. I saw more family squabbles that day than I had ever seen flying. Sadly, most people had forgotten it was the day our Savior, Jesus Christ, was born. Yessiree. They were more concerned about finding a place for their roller blade boxes than they were about it being Jesus’ birthday. Roller blade boxes!!! Bah humbug.

Ho. Ho. Ho-ly moly. That Christmas was the year everyone either gifted or received roller blades. The awkwardly, oversized roller blade boxes came down the aisle in waves. Tidal waves. Grandma may have gotten run over by a reindeer. But, that was nothing compared to being run over on multiple flights by irritated passengers carrying roller blade boxes. I make no bones about it. It stink, stank, stunk. My fellow Skytresses and I worked our Christmas magic trying to get all the boxes to fit in the overhead bins. Heck. Santa had barely returned to the North Pole. We weren’t going to be the first people on Santa’s naughty list for the coming year. Inevitably though, as soon as we secured everyone’s boxes in the overhead bins, a late arriving passenger would board the plane toting another roller blade box. The Taco Bell fare traveler could sense our disappointment at seeing yet another big box. Not wanting to get on our Skytress naughty list, they would sheepishly try to fit their box underneath their seat. I’ll admit. We Skytresses got a little Christmas merriment standing over them watching them struggle with their oversized box. If only we could have said, “We double-dog dare you to make it fit”, we could have made extra holiday pay that Christmas. Unlike the Grinch who’s heart grew three sizes on Christmas Day, our Skytress hearts were already ginormous. Thus, we would fling open overhead bins like we were flinging open window shutters on Christmas Eve. Just like Santa in “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas”, we spoke not a word, but went straight to our work. We would feverishly rearrange luggage in overhead bins. Ultimately we would give each other a nod. Then low and behold the roller blade box would rise into a secure spot like Santa rising up the chimney. I’ve always said Skytresses and Skyters have special powers. That Christmas our special power was getting every roller blade box stowed on the airplane. Hark, the herald angels sang, “Glory to the Skytresses on the Taco Bell airfare plane”.

The following year those of us working on Christmas were prepared for the onslaught of the Christmas Day travelers. Ho. Ho. Ho. Yessiree. We were now veterans of the Taco Bell airfares. Thankfully, many of our passengers were no longer Taco Bell airfare novices, either. They knew our planes would be full. They anticipated long wait lines at security and and the airport restaurants. Happily, there were fewer Scrooge and Grinch-like passengers. Truth be known, my Christmas Day Skytress attitude was much improved the following year, too. I didn’t have a severe case of Santa Shock. No siree bob. I took it all in stride. Even though we still had the Taco Bell fares, people seemed genuinely happy. Dare I say it. Their Christmas spirit was a gift to us all. The biggest gift, however, was the gift that was missing. Gratefully, the year of the roller blade gift was long behind us. There was Peace on Earth….and at 35,000 feet.

Happy Chicken Day

I’m sure you, my dear readers, will be happy to know I am back on vacation. Yessiree. I went on vacation the afternoon of November 8th. Even better for me, I won’t fly again until December. Now don’t you worry my lovely friends. There will be someone working your flights these nexts few weeks. Sadly for those of you who are flying, it just won’t be me. Thankfully we have brand spanking new Skytresses and Skyters out on the line now. They will be flying Thanksgiving like I did when I was a new Skytress. Incredibly, I can only remember flying two Thanksgivings in my 32 years of being a Skytress. It’s not because I only flew two Thanksgivings. No siree bob. I flew my fair share of Thanksgiving trips. Yet, somehow, I have completely blocked out those Thanksgivings. I call it Turkey Trauma…..aviation amnesia. Thankfully for you all, I vividly remember my first Thanksgiving flying. Yessiree. It scarred me for life. So, of course, I HAVE to share this story with you.

I wasn’t surprised when I got the call from crew scheduling that I had a trip on Thanksgiving. However, I was surprised when the scheduler told me I would be laying over in Puerto Rico. Actually, my heart sank. I was positive I would be laying over somewhere in the continental United States. I heard numerous stories from my fellow Skytresses and Skyters about flying on Thanksgiving. It seemed every hotel across the nation had an extra-special Thanksgiving dinner prepared just for the airline crews. Yessiree. I had visions of wearing a nice fall outfit to dinner. There would be beautiful fall colors on the trees outside of the hotel restaurant. I envisioned myself sipping hot apple cider and having a slice of pumpkin pie for dessert. No. I didn’t envision myself flying to Puerto Rico on Thanksgiving. Puerto Rico didn’t have fall foliage. No siree bob. They had hot sandy beaches filled with sunbathers. Heck, I wasn’t supposed to get cooked on Thanksgiving. The turkey was!

I remember anxiously walking into the briefing room. Several Skytresses were already quietly sitting at the briefing table. I quickly learned none of us had ever flown to Puerto Rico. Even worse, all of us had barely flown on the L-1011. The L-1011, or the Tri-Star, as we also referred to it, was the biggest airplane in our fleet. It was an intimidating aircraft for a new Skytress or Skyter to fly on. Although I had only been flying for five months, I was the most senior reserve Skytress sitting in the room. Then the two senior line holder Skytresses walked into the briefing room. They were language speakers. They had only been flying a few months longer than us. At the time our airline needed Spanish speakers. Thus, these Skytresses were never on reserve. Yep. They had the great fortune of being line holders the day they graduated from training. These Skytresses didn’t have to sit and wait for scheduling to call them for a trip. No siree bob. They knew what trips they would be flying all month. These ladies flew to Puerto Rico every trip. Now normally these Skytresses would have been the most junior Skytresses on the crew. However, the senior Skytresses did what senior Skytresses do. They chose not to fly on Thanksgiving. These Spanish speaking Skytresses didn’t miss them one bit. They relished being the Senior Mamas to us reserve Skytresses. It was quite obvious to the rest of us. To say the power went to their beautiful Skytress heads,…..would clearly be an understatement.

The senior Skytresses were well versed in talking down to us. In both English….and in Spanish. However, they weren’t completely awful. They knew it was a special holiday. They even brought a treat to make it more special. Yessiree. They excitedly informed us they had brought a big cookie to celebrate, “your chicken day”. Oh how they laughed when they said this. They laughed in English….and in Spanish. I looked at the reserve Skytresses on our crew. We all wanted to roll our eyes into the back of our heads. Only it was Thanksgiving. It would have been rude to do such a thing. I regret it terribly now.

The crew walked silently up to the aircraft. Well, except for the Senior Mama’s. They were giddy. Giddy with power. When we got on the aircraft we briefed with the pilots. The pilots informed us their families would be coming on the trip with us. The senior Skytresses were ecstatic. The more the merrier as far as they were concerned. The one Skytress happily opened her cookie box. A turkey was decorated on top of the chocolate chip cookie. She proudly told the pilots she brought a cookie to celebrate, “your chicken day”. The pilots looked at each other. Then they looked at us reserve Skytresses. I’ll admit. A few eyes did roll. When the senior Skytresses walked away the Captain asked, “They know it’s a turkey right? It’s Thanksgiving. Not Chicken Day.” None of us said anything. After all, it was Thanksgiving. We shouldn’t be rude. Okay. We did roll our eyes a wee bit more. I couldn’t help it. We all knew Puerto Rico is a territory of the United States. Those senior Skytresses knew the holiday was called Thanksgiving. Happy Chicken Day was getting on all of our nerves.

I walked around the L-1011 trying to look useful. Mostly, though, I was trying to figure out where everything was before the passengers boarded the airplane. The First Officer came up to me. He told me they were going to hold off boarding. There was a maintenance issue. He told me there was a good chance they would have to cancel the flight. Oh, how I prayed our flight would get cancelled. But as luck would have it, our extremely knowledgeable mechanics fixed the maintenance issue in record time. Before the Senior Mama’s could wish our mechanics a Happy Chicken Day, we were off to Puerto Rico.

On our drive to the hotel, the pilots asked the senior Skytresses if they knew of any restaurants that might be open on Thanksgiving. The pilots hoped everyone would join them and their families for Thanksgiving dinner. The senior Skytresses said they would ask the concierge when we arrived at the hotel. The concierge was standing by the check-in desk when we arrived. One of the Senior Skytresses informed the concierge the crew wanted to go to a really nice restaurant to celebrate our chicken day. The concierge gleefully suggested a restaurant that was open. We all decided on a time to meet in the lobby for dinner. I went up to my beautiful hotel room that overlooked the water. I remember thinking any other day this would be a fabulous layover. But, being in Puerto Rico on Thanksgiving with our snarky senior Skytresses was definitely a turkey of a trip for me.

We all met in the lobby at our designated time. We jumped into several cabs and rode to the restaurant. We reserve Skytresses huddled in one cab together. When we arrived at the restaurant we knew the concierge had diligently done his job. We were at a VERY nice restaurant. I looked at the prices on the menu when the waiter handed it to me. I was shocked. As in sticker-shock, shocked. The Thanksgiving dinner special was so expensive I actually thought in Spanish….”Dios Mios!”….my god. I looked at my fellow reserve Skytresses. They, too, were in sticker-shock, shock. There was no way I was going to pay that much for a turkey dinner. But, darn it. It was my birthday the next day. I was going to have something nice eat to make up for this lousy Thanksgiving. So, I ordered the chicken. Yessiree. Happy Chicken Day! My fellow reserve Skytresses ordered water and side salads. It was the cheapest thing on the menu. They told everyone else they weren’t hungry for anything more. I knew they were new Skytresses. They were poor. Poor and hungry. You see, they never got one bite of the cookie the senior Skytresses had brought for our chicken day. Nope. The two senior Skytresses ate the entire cookie by themselves.

I was relieved when we finally left the restaurant. Thanksgiving was almost over. The cab ride back to the hotel was something to behold. Our cab driver blared his music the entire way back to the hotel. He had all the windows rolled down because his cab didn’t have any air conditioning. Fortunately, we didn’t really notice this fact. Nope. The red ball fringe he had stapled inside the entire perimeter of cab roof distracted us. I prayed to God that he would grant me one birthday wish….. to make it back to the hotel. Thankfully, God heard my wish and granted it.

I rode up in the elevator with the First Officer and his family. His wife made a comment about it being her husband’s birthday the next day. I smiled. I told them my birthday was the next day, too. We all laughed at the birthday coincidence.

The next day I tried to keep my distance from the senior Skytresses. Wherever they were, I tried not to be. I was standing outside the galley lift doors laughing with my fellow reserve Skytresses when the two senior Skytresses turned the corner. We all went silent. The two senior Skytresses stared at me in disbelief. The senior of the senior Skytresses wanted to know why I didn’t tell them it was my birthday. I desperately wanted to tell them it was because they were so mean. Instead, I told them I didn’t want to make a big deal about it being my birthday. My two fellow reserve Skytresses were completely surprised it was my birthday. They were curious how the two Skytresses knew this information. The senior Skytresses explained the First Officer’s wife told them it was not only her husband’s birthday, but, it was my birthday, too. After the two Skytresses left, my fellow Skytress turned to me. She said if it was her birthday she wouldn’t have mentioned it to the two Senior Mama’s either. She said, “They aren’t very nice.” The other Skytress and I laughed in agreement.

The pilots were finished with their trip when we landed in Atlanta. Unfortunately, we had to keep flying. I consoled myself with the fact that my trip would be over sooner than later. The odds were, also, in my favor that I would never have to fly with these two senior Skytresses again. If I did, these two most certainly wouldn’t be the senior Skytresses. No siree bob. The REAL Senior Mama’s would be back from their holiday. These two Skytresses would be bumped back to their lowly junior status. Alleluia! My other prevailing thought was the likelihood of me having another Puerto Rico trip on Thanksgiving was slim to none. Yessiree. I would be based in Cincinnati come January. The Cincinnati base didn’t have Puerto Rico layovers.

Many Thanksgivings have come and gone since my first Skytress Thanksgiving. Like I said, most of them I have blocked out of my mind. I’ll admit, though. Whenever I spy a Thanksgiving turkey cookie, I think back to my Puerto Rico Thanksgiving. I shake my head and chuckle. I can’t help myself. I smile a great big smile. Without hesitation I laugh and think, “Happy Chicken Day!” Happy Chicken Day everyone. May you all have a very blessed Thanksgiving.

Haunted Hotels

Since yesterday was Halloween, I decided I would write about ghost stories. Specifically, hotel ghost stories. Sounds spooky, eh? If you are a Skytress or Skyter staying in these hotels, it can be down right haunting.

I never thought about hotels being haunted until I became a Skytress. Early in my flying career, I flew with a crew that had stayed at the Huntley Hotel in Los Angeles. I was the extra-crew member. I flew with the crew the day after they had stayed at the Huntley Hotel. The crew told me they all shared hotel rooms on the layover. Yessiree. They were too scared to sleep in their own hotel rooms. I didn’t have to ask why they were all huddled in the same room. No, siree bob. They freely told me about the comings and goings of the Huntley ghosts. A Skytress on the crew told me she had stayed at the hotel once alone in her room. In the middle of the night she heard someone knocking on her hotel window. She told me she was on an upper hotel floor. She then stated there wasn’t a balcony outside her room either. She knew without a doubt it was the Huntley ghost outside her room. She said she was too scared to go to sleep that night. Ever since that layover, she shared a hotel room with another Skytress. She figured there was safety in numbers. Two Skytresses could definitely take on one ghost. Not this Skytress, though. I avoided this hotel after hearing all their spooky stories.

One of my favorite hotels to stay in is The Mills House in Charleston. The location is ideal for shopping and going out to eat. Yessiree. Two of Skytresses and Skyters favorite things to do. The beds in The Mills House are extremely comfortable. The hotel, also, has copies of the Charleston Wedding magazine in every room. I absolutely love flipping through this magazine on my layovers. It could quite possibly be the hotel ghosts love all these things about The Mills House, too. Yessiree. The hotel is notorious for ghost hauntings. Crews say the hotel ghosts do most of their hauntings on the forth floor. I don’t know this is a fact or not. But, I find it rather interesting. The Mills House ghosts are a fastidious group of ghosts. It’s been reported that guests hear the ghosts moving furniture around in the hotel rooms. I’ve flown with several Skytresses and Skyters that have told me they threw spare change on the desk in their rooms. Spookily, when they arose in the morning, their spare change was neatly lined up on the desk. Being a neat-nick, I get a chuckle out of this.

One day I was flying home with a Skytress I commute with. We were chitchatting about things as we settled into our seats. I asked Donna where she had been on her trip. She replied she had a Charleston layover. She paused for a moment. Then she looked directly at me and she chuckled. I knew she was about to tell me a story. And boy did she! Donna asked me if I had ever heard about The Mills House being haunted. I said I had. Without hesitation, Donna started her story by stating, “I’m just saying, this happened to me… and I can’t explain it”. She told me she had returned to her hotel room after an afternoon of shopping. She was tired. She decided she would lay down on her bed and take a well-deserved nap. Since it was still bright outside she closed her curtains to darken her room. When she woke up several hours later her hotel curtains were open. I giggled. I told Donna The Mills House ghosts were up and moving about. Apparently, they wanted her to be up and moving about,too.

Another layover hotel for our airline crews in Charleston was the Francis Marion. It’s a beautiful, grand, old hotel. Sadly for me, the location of the hotel wasn’t as ideal as The Mills House. Plus, each room I had there was always on the smaller side. I felt like I was constantly shuffling around furniture to get to my bed or the bathroom. Come to find out, I wasn’t the only one shuffling about the hotel. Nope. There are ghosts at the Francis Marion that shuffle about, too. My Skyter friend, Will, told me about his layover there one night. He and his crew arrived at the hotel later in the evening. The hotel clerk told them the hotel was completely booked. She explained to Will and his crew that their rooms would be on the floor that was being renovated. She further explained they would be the only guests on this particular floor. However, she said, Will and his crew would be staying in the newly renovated rooms. Since Will and his crew had a short layover, they would be long gone before the workmen arrived in the morning. Yessiree. They wouldn’t be disturbed by any construction noise. Skyter Will told me he and the two Skytresses on his crew headed up to their renovated guest rooms. They were all eager to get a good nights sleep. Will then stated he was only in his room for a few minutes when he noticed shadows coming from outside his door. Will thought it was one of the Skytresses going down the hallway. Will was curious. He opened his door to see if there was a problem with the Skytress’ hotel room. Shockingly, there wasn’t anyone in the hallway when Will opened the door. Will turned back into his room and went to close the curtains. When he did, he noticed a gentleman outside his window. Will thought it was just one of the construction workers. Then he looked a little closer. Will told me there was no logical way the gentleman could have walked outside of the hotel to his current location. It unnerved Will. Moments later his hotel phone rang. It was one of the Skytresses on his crew. She was panicked. She told Will she was spooked. She kept seeing shadows pass her door. The Skytress knew they were the only three people staying on the floor. Whenever the Skytress looked out her door, there wasn’t anyone there. Then she told Will she saw a gentleman outside her hotel window. For the life of her she couldn’t figure out how he got there. Will told her he had experienced the same things. They decided to check on the other Skytress. Will called her room. The other Skytress told Will she had a very weird feeling about her hotel room. She didn’t feel comfortable spending the night in there. Skyter Will and the two Skytresses decided to gather their belongings and go down to the front desk. They all wanted to inquire about getting new rooms. The hotel clerk was surprised to see the three of them back at the check-in desk. Before the hotel clerk could say anything, Skyter Will asked her if the hotel was haunted. The hotel clerk smiled. She informed them that some hotel guests have told stories about seeing ghosts at the hotel. The three of them recounted their experiences on the renovated floor. The hotel clerk apologized to them. She said she wished she had other guest rooms she could give them. Unfortunately, she didn’t have any available. Skyter Will and the two Skytresses were too spooked to return to their renovated floor. Instead, they stayed in the lobby and fell asleep on the couches until it was time for their van pickup. Yessiree. I believe I would have made the same decision.

We used to stay at the Seelbach Hotel in Louisville. The hotel is known for being one of the grandest hotels in the United States. It’s also known amongst airline crews as being a very haunted hotel. My friend Tara told me a story about staying at the Sealbach when she was a Skytress for United. Tara told me she went to take a shower. After her shower, she planned to eat the cookie the hotel gives all its guests when they check in. Tara explained to me that she placed her cookie on the nightstand before she went into the bathroom. When she came out of the bathroom, she noticed her cookie was no longer on the nightstand. Tara was befuddled. So, she called her roommate that was flying with her on the trip. Tara asked Cindy if she had come into her room and took her cookie off the nightstand. Cindy laughed. She asked Tara how she would have done this since she didn’t have a key to Tara’s room. Tara obviously knew Cindy couldn’t get into her room. Thus, there were only two logical explanations for the missing cookie. Both explanations didn’t sit well with her. One explanation was that a rodent ran off with her cookie. The other explanation was the Sealbach ghost took the cookie. Tara and I believe the latter. Heck. We couldn’t blame the ghost. Those Sealbach cookies were delicious.

One day I was in the aft galley setting up the beverage carts with my Skyter friend Rick. As we were talking, Rick told me about his ghostly encounter at the Seelbach. Rick explained to me that he was in bed watching the television. His television kept turning on and off. Also, while he was laying in bed, his toilet kept flushing. Rick immediately thought about all the ghost stories he had heard about the Seelbach. Skyter Rick suspected the ghosts were in his room that evening having fun at his expense. Rick spoke out loud to the ghosts. He informed he ghosts he meant them no harm. He just wanted to watch a little TV before he went to bed. After speaking to the ghosts, Rick told me the toilet stopped flushing and the TV stayed on. I found this all very interesting. Especially how calm Skyter Rick was concerning the ghostly activity. I made a mental note to speak to any ghosts I encountered on my layovers. I, also, made a mental note to not layover at the Seelbach ever again.

A few months back I was looking at the trips in our bid packet. There was an airport code I wasn’t familiar with. The airport code began with the letter “Y”. Based on this information, I knew it was a code for a city in Canada. FYI-Canadian airport codes start with the letter “Y”. You all know by now how much I love Canada! Thus, I was compelled to find out which city the airport code, YWG, belonged to. YWG is the airport code for Winnipeg. Winnipeg?! I have never been to Winnipeg. I was intrigued. The trip wasn’t commutable for me. Nevertheless, I decided to Google the layover hotel. You know. ….Just in case I was rerouted there. After all, I am The Rerouted Skytress! The first thing I read on The Fort Garry Hotel website was that the hotel is haunted. Wow! Most hotels don’t like to disclose this information. Yet, this hotel was extremely proud of this fact. I decided I would look on our Skytress Facebook page and see if anyone mentioned the hauntings at this hotel. Yessiree. Several Skytresses gave their ghostly testimonials. Egads! They were positively frightful. There were, also, numerous stories on the Skytress Facebook page about ghosts at other layover hotels. I was gobsmacked. After reading about all the ghostly hotel encounters, I was completely spooked. I almost decided it would be safer to fly one-day trips just to avoid all the layover ghosts.

One day my Skyter friend David and I were eating lunch in Savannah. As we were talking, I saw a black hurst drive up outside. David’s back was to the window. However, when I told him a black hurst had pulled up in front of the restaurant, he was compelled to turn around in his seat. I was a little concerned when David told me the make and model of the hurst. Mostly, though, I was impressed. I was more impressed when we realized the hurst was the transportation vehicle for one of the ghost tours. How spooktacular! I informed David if I were ever to take a ghost tour in Savannah, this would be the one to take. I thought this for months. Then one day I was on a layover in another city. I watched a documentary on ghosts in Savannah. The stories weren’t happy, delightful, Casper The Friendly Ghost stories. No siree bob. These ghosts didn’t like humans one bit. The ghosts let this fact be known, too. The documentary showed several places in Savannah where ghosts tried to push people downstairs. Egads! The stories of the ghosts trying to hurl people down the stairs were the nicer ghost stories, too! I was so spooked by the documentary, I vowed never to go on a ghost tour. Especially, one in a hurst!

I flew with a pilot once that told me a story about his layover. The crew was downstairs waiting on one of the Skytresses to come down for pickup. It was getting late. So, the pilot called the room to make sure the Skytress hadn’t overslept. When the Skytress answered the phone, she sounded frantic. She couldn’t find her shoes. She had looked everywhere in the room. She was dumbfounded. She knew exactly where she had taken her shoes off when she got to her room the day before. The pilot told her he would come up to her room and help her look. The pilot and Skytress opened up every drawer of the armoire. They looked in the closet, behind the curtains and all around the furniture. They even looked under the bed and under the furniture. Exasperated, the pilot stood on a chair and looked on top of the armoire. TheSkytress’ shoes were placed nicely together on top of the armoire. The top of the armoire was too tall for the Skytress to reach, let alone place her shoes neatly on top. The pilot told me he and the Skytress had no possible explanation of how the shoes ended up on top of the armoire. Well, there was one explanation. The hotel was haunted.

Play Ball

Long before I was a Skytress, I worked for the St. Louis Cardinals. When people ask me what I did for the Cardinals I usually joke and say, I played third base. What is even funnier, people pause for just a moment to see if I am actually joking. Tonight as I write this blog, I am in Memphis. Autozone Park is across the street from our hotel. The St. Louis Cardinals minor league team plays in Autozone Park. Tonight is the Wild Card game between the Los Angeles Dodgers and the St. Louis Cardinals. Hopefully it is fortuitous for the Cardinals that our layover hotel is next to the Memphis Cardinals ballpark. I shall find out if this is indeed true when I wake up in the wee hours of the morning to get ready for my day of flying. I am not going to watch the ballgame though. Nope. I don’t want to jinx my Cardinals. Now I can be very superstitious about certain things. I am most definitely superstitious when it comes to my Cardinals. My Cardinals had a tough season this year. Remarkably, they went on a 17-game winning streak and made it into the Wild Card game. I’ll admit. I didn’t watch one game during the winning streak. When the Cardinals started to win, I stopped watching. Yessiree. I am a loyal Cardinal fan. I didn’t want to mess up their good thing. Sadly, my friend Michael did. Yep. He’s a diehard Cincinnati Reds fan. He texted me the night the streak ended. BEFORE the streak ended. Of course, he said he meant no harm. However, I believe he knew his text would jinx the winning streak. And it did. I can’t prove it. But, I think he may be working undercover for the Cincinnati Reds. You see, our baseball teams are big rivals. Tonight Michael texted me to see if I was rooting for the Cardinals or for the Dodgers in the Wild Card game. Heck. I’m not falling for his jinx tactic again. Nope. I refuse to respond to his text until tomorrow. Hopefully, by not responding to his text, the jinx won’t be effective. All I can say is, if Michael didn’t mean any harm with his first text, he better be on his knees praying for a Cardinals victory. It wouldn’t surprise me, though, if Micheal is in cahoots with my friend Phillip. Phillip is a huge Dodgers fan. Last time I was in Los Angeles on a layover, Phillip invited me to go to Dodger Stadium. My Cardinals were playing the Dodgers. Phillip said I could root for my Cardinals. Egads! Of course I was going to root for them! I’m proud to report, my Cardinals beat the Dodgers. Now, I’m convinced Phillip teamed up with Michael to get back at me and my Cardinals. Yessiree. The conspiracy theories are swirling around my head these days. Tis the season of conspiracy theories for devoted baseball fans. Yes, folks. It’s called the “Post Season”. My Dad used to say, “Don’t take the World Series-ously”. My Dad always said this even though he knew darn well we always take the Wold Series seriously. After all, we are not just Cardinal fans. We are baseball fans.

The best view from our hotel lobby at 445am….Go Cards
My summer Cardinal Uniform
I always had a ball working with my friends at Busch Stadium

News flash! Michael’s text-jinx worked. My Cardinals lost to the Dodgers. So, this coming year I will root twice as hard against the Reds as a payback to Michael. Funny, I never used to root against the Reds. Nope. I used to root for the Cincinnati Reds when I was younger and lived in Cincinnati. I loved The Big Red Machine! I even rooted for the Reds when I was a Skytess living in Cincinnati. Heck. I proudly welcomed the passengers to Cincinnati… “the home of the World Champion Cincinnati Reds” when they won the World Series in 1990. And I wasn’t even living there. No, I was living in Atlanta…..rooting for “America’s Team”. Don’t be shocked by this admission. I grew up watching the Braves with my best friends, Tara and Shannon. They grew up in Atlanta. Their family watched every Braves game. We talked about the Braves players and the games all the time. This didn’t change when I became a Skytress. Actually, the stories just got better. Being the official airline of the Atlanta Braves has it’s perks. There are always Braves stories to tell with relationship to my airline. Yessiree. I remember telling my friends the story of a Skytress that I flew with once. She assumed the guy she always saw at her pool was a Skyter. Apparently, just like her, he was always at the pool during the day. Not everyday. Just every few days like a person with a Skyter schedule would be. He, also, looked very familiar to her. She wondered if he looked familiar to her because she has seen him in the crew lounge before. So, one day she decided she would asked him if he was indeed a Skyter. He smiled and chuckled at her question. He understood why she would think he was a Skyter. After all, most people are at work during the day. He replied he wasn’t a Skyter. No sir. He played baseball for the Atlanta Braves. He explained to the Skytress he would come to the pool during the day and play baseball at night when the team was in town. As it turned out, that year the Braves won the World Series. I’ll admit. It’s pretty cool to be able to wear our airline wings. But, to be able to wear a World Series Championship ring….well, there really is no comparison. Plus, you can almost guarantee,….no one will ever mistake you for being an airline Skyter at the local swimming pool when you are sporting a Championship ring.

Years ago when I was a young Skytress flying out of Cincinnati, it came up in conversation that I worked for the Cardinals while I was in high school and college. My Skytress In-Charge got very excited when she heard this information. She immediately asked me if I would like to fly the Cardinals charter with her. You see, her husband was a friend of one of the Cardinal players. Apparently, the Cardinal players were tired of the senior Atlanta Skytresses working their charter flights. They wanted some young Skytresses to work their flights for a change. As luck would have it, Cincinnati Skytresses we’re scheduled to work their charter from Cincinnati to St. Louis the following month. I told my Skytress In-Charge I would put in for the charter. I’ll admit. I was a wee bit reluctant to fly the charter. I knew the Cardinals had some very lively characters on the team. I wasn’t sure how it would be working a flight with them. Nonetheless, I put in for the charter. A few days later, I pulled my request out of the computer. I had something else come up and I needed to be off the day of the Cardinal charter. I saw my Skytress In-Charge in the lounge one day and told her I wasn’t going to be able to work the charter flight. A few weeks later I happened to fly with the same Skytress. I inquired how the Cardinal charter went. She said it was awful. Without hesitation she told me she had to go to see the Chief Pilot immediately after the trip. I was shocked. I never heard of a Skytress doing this. It just didn’t happen back in those days. My Skytress In-Charge explained the players were extremely rowdy. Apparently, having a much younger crew working their flight must have been too much for the players. She explained the players made multiple sexual comments to the Skytresses working the flight.….among other unacceptable behaviors. She said the most appalling incident happened when they arrived in St. louis and the team started to deplane. One of the players grab the Skytress In-Charge’s boobs and heartily squeezed them as he deplaned. She was shocked by his brazen behavior. Worse, she felt extremely violated. The Captain was standing at the front of the plane next to her as the player groped her. When the Captain didn’t address the player and his inappropriate behavior, she said something to the Captain. The Captain’s response to her was, “Haven’t you ever had anyone grab your boobs before?” This comment incensed her. She said she walked off the airplane and walked directly into the Chief Pilot’s office to complained about the Captain. The Chief Pilot told her he would talk to the pilot. He assured her he would address the Captain’s comments and lack of leadership in this particular situation. After I listened to the Skytress’ entire story, I told her I was sorry she was placed in this uncomfortable situation. Then I told her I had a bad feeling about this charter….and I was right. I love my Cardinals. But, I was definitely relieved I didn’t work this charter. Years later, our airline and professional sports teams decided to have dedicated Skytresses and Skyters working their charters. These days Skytresses and Skyters have to apply and go through an interview process to be selected to be in the sports charter program. Fortunately for everyone involved, there is more accountability when it comes to sports charters compared to years ago. Yes. It’s a whole new ballgame. Thank goodness.

The Cardinals return home after Michael jinxed them

My Cardinals may not be the best airline passengers. But gosh darn it, they are usually spectacular post season baseball players. I’ll admit. I am a wee bit spoiled because my Cardinals have played in numerous post season games. We like to call the post season, “Cardinal Season”. Catchy, isn’t it? One night I was laying over in Greensboro at the airport. My crew decided we would meet in the restaurant for dinner. The television production crews for the NASCAR race were staying at our hotel. Just like us, the production crews decided to meet up in the restaurant. The hotel restaurant opened up into the hotel lobby. There wasn’t a wall separating the two areas. It was a very casual atmosphere, to say the least. My crew and I were having a grand time chit-chatting with the NASCAR folks. As a result, I completely forgot my Cardinals were playing in the playoffs that evening. I had just returned to my hotel room when Ron texted me. He wanted to see how my day of flying had been. I told him about the NASCAR people. He kidded me about hanging out with the NASCAR people when there was a perfectly good playoff game happening with my Cardinals. Yessiree. While I was hanging out with my crew and the NASCAR people, Ron was at home in Atlanta rooting for my Cardinals. I was extremely impressed. As I turned the ballgame on in my hotel room, I teased Ron that he was now an official member of “Cardinals Nation”. Ron must have been the Cardinals secret post season weapon. The Cardinals won the game that night.

Remember my friend Michael, “The Jinxster”? Michael and I decided one year we would call a truce to our Reds-Cardinals rivalry. We decided that year we would root for the Chicago Cubs. As it would happen, this is the year the Cubs won the World Series. You’re welcome Cubs fans! I hope you enjoyed the victory because Michael and I decided our rivalry was much better than the Cubs winning another World Series. Yessiree. It wasn’t easy for us to see the Cubs win. I’ll admit. I did root for the Cubs. I wanted my Cubby friends to finally win a World Series. If only so I didn’t have to hear about “The Curse” anymore. Egads!!! I’ll admit. As a true baseball fan, I was happy to actually see the Cubs win. I was laying over in Las Vegas the night the Cubs won. Fortunately for me, we stay at a swanky hotel in Las Vegas. I was prepared to thoroughly enjoy my layover watching the World Series. The first thing I did when I entered my hotel room was head over to the television to turn it on. I didn’t want to fool around at the last minute trying to find the channel broadcasting the ballgame. I was gobsmacked when my television didn’t work. I made sure everything was plugged in properly. It was. Sadly folks, this is the extent of my television troubleshooting expertise. I contemplated just watching the game in the bathroom. Ah, yes. There are televisions in our Las Vegas hotel bathrooms. And there is a lovely jacuzzis tub to boot. It’s the only tub I would ever fathom soaking in on a layover. But heck, I didn’t want to sit for 9 innings in a tub watching the World Series….no matter how swanky the hotel bath was. So instead, I called the front desk and asked them to send a maintenance man to my room. Thankfully the gentleman came rather quickly. He was having some issues trying to get the television to work. I told him I wouldn’t normally care about watching TV. Only I wanted to watch the final game of the World Series. I told him I was prepared to pack up all my belongings and get a new room if I had too. Fortunately after some finagling, the kind gentleman was able to get the television to work. Minutes later, I settled in my comfy bed to watch the game. I kid you not. When the Cubs won, fireworks went off outside our hotel. I was flabbergasted and tickled by the whole celebration. A few minutes later my cell phone rang. It was Ron. He called to see if I had watched the Cubs win the World Series. I told him I was watching the celebration on television as we spoke. He was amazed when I told him fireworks were going off outside the hotel. We laughed at the absurdity of it all. We ended up talking forever on the phone. Yes. The Cubs won the World Series that night. However, it was the marathon phone conversation afterwards that was the highlight of the evening for us. Yessiree. It’s a beautiful memory I will cherish forever.

Since Michael jinxed the Cardinals this year, I was forced to watch the Dodgers play instead. Luckily Mary Hart sits behind home plate at the Dodgers games. I’ll admit. I watched Mary Hart instead of the game most of the time. What can I say? I’m a bigger fan of Mary Hart than I am of the Dodgers. For those of you wondering….I’ve finally decided which team I am going to root for this post season. Being a baseball fan, I’m obligated to pick a team. Needless to say, for this Cardinal fan, it will be a consolation victory for me if this team wins. I’m sure you all are sitting on the edge of your seats wondering which team I am going to root for to win the World Series. Well, my lips are sealed. I’m not going to let Michael jinx this team, too. Egads! I know….I know. I shouldn’t take the World Series-ously . But, I do. After all, I am my father’s daughter.

Philip and I are smiling like we just saw Mary Hart at the Dodgers game

Cowboy Up

Lately I’ve noticed a lot more people driving Ferrari’s around my area. That’s a lot of horsepower. It’s not my kind of horsepower, though. No. My kind of horsepower actually involves horses. Yessiree,….horse power. You all know about my love of Clydesdales. You’ve read about my love of the Cowboy Channel. My Montana roots run deep. Considering my parents are from Jersey City, it’s a miracle I’m not a city gal. Yes. I can appreciate the city. Any city. But, my heart yearns for the mountains of my birthplace. I haven’t had a Montana layover in a month of Sundays. Thankfully, I have been flying out West a lot recently. When I’m not flying, you can bet I have the Cowboy Channel on. What was once a channel for background noise, has become an addiction. Some of you may say, “You’re Crazy!”. I say, “Cowboy Up!”

Ok, I’ll watch now….and later, too

The Cowboy Channel has been televising 100 rodeos in 100 days. Who knew there were that many rodeos out there? I knew about the Calgary Stampede Rodeo and the Cheyenne Frontier Days Rodeo. I knew there were a few rodeos in Montana and a few more in Wyoming. But, that’s a lot shy of 100. I’ve come to appreciate the Ellensburg Rodeo in Washington. I’ve discovered the Pendleton Round-Up is now my new all-time favorite rodeo. I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised. I’ve always loved a Pendleton blanket. My Mom introduced me to Pendleton clothing when I was a young girl. Pendleton was quality clothing. Turns out the Pendleton Round-Up is quality rodeoing. Who knew? Well, guess I know now! Cowboy up!

Yes, watching the cowboys ride a bucking horse or bucking bull is quite impressive. Watching cowgirls maneuver their horses around the barrels is mesmerizing. However, it is the rodeo American pride that has really captured my heart. Each rodeo starts with a prayer that praises God, Country and the American spirit. Families stand together. They bow their heads. Cowboy hats cover their hearts. The tributes to the military and freedom are spectacular. The rodeo announcers are full of praise and positivity for each cowboy and cowgirl. They always remind the audience the competitors may not remember how well they did, but, they will always remember how the people made them feel. And the people always make the cowboys and cowgirls feel loved. The cowboys and cowgirls root for one another. It’s sportsmanship at its finest. It’s very refreshing. All the while, the rodeo barrel man keeps everyone entertained. It’s great, clean entertainment. Well, minus the rodeo dirt and the bull flinging nose snot. The peppy rodeo music is a fantastic bonus. Yessiree. I catch myself singing along with the rodeo crowd. Another bonus….the sound of the rodeo announcer’s and rodeo barrel man’s voices are so soothing they lull me to sleep when bedtime comes.

Well, that’s no little buckaroo

A few weeks ago I flew into Rapid City. That’s South Dakota for those of you who may not know. It’s also where you fly into if you want to visit Mount Rushmore. Rapid City may not sound like a desirable destination. But, don’t tell Skytresses and Skyters this. For us…It’s a coveted destination. Yessiree. I couldn’t hold the 30- hour layover. I could only hold the 13- hour layover. Even with the shorter layover, I thought about renting a car to go see Mount Rushmore. I hadn’t been to Mount Rushmore in years. The cheapest car rental was $200 for the day. One car rental agency was asking $500. Edags! My crew and I deadheaded into Rapid City on a regional jet. I hadn’t been on a regional jet in years. (Note to self…..next time, check my crew bags plane side. The regional planes may be bigger than I remember them. But, the aisle are still as narrow). The flight from Minneapolis was just over an hour. I looked out the window the whole time. The closer we got to Rapid City, the more excited I became. It was fascinating flying in. The rolling hills were brown from lack of rain. In the middle of nowhere there would be live stock dotting the land. I was trying to figure it all out as I looked at the landscape outside my window. Sadly, we landed way before I was ready. Heck, I didn’t have time to take a picture out my window for you all. I’ll be more prepared next time.

When the crew settled into our seats in the crew van we were all chatting about our flight into Rapid City. No one slept on the flight. We all were looking out our respective windows taking in the sights of South Dakota. The Captain jokingly asked if anyone was going to go to a rodeo on our layover. I know I impressed him when I told him the Rapid City Rodeo was the previous week. Okay, maybe I scared him with this information. I’m sure he never flew with a Skytress that watched the Cowboy Channel. The Captain impressed me when he started talking about mutton bustin races. The first officer laughed. He was familiar with mutton bustin. My Skyter In-Charge and my Skytress crew member had no idea what mutton bustin was. If you don’t know what mutton bustin is, let me explain. Mutton bustin is where little children lay on sheep and hold on to see how far they can ride them. It’s hysterical. Incredibly, I’ve learned the best technique is to lay on the sheep backwards. One can get a better hold on them and ride further. This is just a little observation on my part if you ever find yourself in a mutton bustin contest. You’re welcome!

Oh, to be a kid again and do some mutton bustin

Since we arrived in Rapid City at dinner time, we went to dinner. Here’s an interesting tidbit for you all. My airline is known around the industry as the airline that loves to eat. We pride ourselves on this fact. The one Skytress on our crew that hadn’t been to Mount Rushmore decided she would like to go there when there was more time to see it. She definitely wanted to go to dinner though. This doesn’t come as a shock to you all now, does it? We decided to go the The Firehouse Brewing Company for dinner. My brother Brian would have loved it. It was all things firehouse related. I don’t know if an actual fireman cooked my dinner,….but, it was delicious. Our Skyter In-Charge had the best stories. I didn’t think anyone could top them. I was wrong. More on that in a moment. After dinner we walked around the city. There are statues of Presidents all around town. It was quirky and we loved it. The Skytress on our crew wanted to check out Graffiti Alley. It’s just that. An alley with lots of graffiti. It was quirky, too. Rapid City had a cute downtown area. The shops were closed by the time we finished our dinner. That just means I will have more to check out next time I’m in Rapid City…..Along with….the Badlands National Park, the Chapel in the Hills, and the Crazy Horse Memorial. Surprisingly, I’ve already seen Storybook Island. It’s a children’s park where storybook characters come to life. My family went there on a trip back to Montana. To this day, I still think about the woman who lived in a shoe. There was a giant shoe you could go in….just like in the nursery rhyme. It was fabulous! Or should I say, heel-arious?!

The Firehouse Brewing Company mural is on fire

Now, I mentioned my Skyter-In Charge told us the best stories. I also wrote there was one person that topped his stories. Yessiree. It was none other than our van driver. On our way back to the hotel we could hear a train whistle. Although, we knew it was nearby, we couldn’t see it. Nonetheless, it made us all nostalgic. I remember riding trains when I was a young girl in Montana. I mention hearing the train when we arrived back to the hotel. The van driver said when he was a young boy he really didn’t think much about the trains. Nope. He was captivated by the helicopters that came to town. The van driver explained people could take rides in the helicopter. He rode in the helicopter when he was 14 years old. He’s been fascinated by flying ever since that day. About the same time the helicopter came to town, so did the carnival. The van driver recalled how he was enchanted by the carnival, too. He was so enamored by the carnival that at age 14 he got a job working there. When the carnival left to go to other towns, he left with them. He spent several months traveling with the carnival out west. He explained he was young and could climb up all the rides to help put them together. Then later he’d climb back up and help take them apart. He told me about the carnival people. He said they were unique to the general population. To him, they were the nicest people he had ever encountered. He told me the carnival people wanted him to stay with them and continue to travel around the country. They were going to pay for his education. The van driver said it was a tempting offer. But, he wanted to come home and finish school. I had a hundred questions I wanted to ask the van driver. I wanted to know what life was like for him as a young man that would make joining the carnival at 14 possible. Did his family need the money? Did he even have a family? As I was formulating all my questions, the driver told me his carnival name was Bee. He said he got the moniker when one day he took a sip of his soda and he swallowed a bee. No sooner did he tell me this story when a woman asked if he could drive her back to the airport. Sadly, there would be no answers to my plethora of questions I had. We said our goodbyes. He left for the airport. I went upstairs to my room and made a commitment to myself that I would be back for another layover….and as Paul Harvey would say,…”the rest of the story”.

The next day we left Rapid City to head back to Atlanta. Myself and my fellow Skytress skedaddled out of our jumpseats as soon as it was safe. The back of the airplane was empty. We wanted to get one more look at Rapid City and the surrounding landscape as we headed back to Atlanta. Sadly, the visibility that morning was poor. Thick clouds impeded our view of the ground. We were both disappointed.

I’m not sure when I will be back to Rapid City. I hope it’s sooner than later. I can’t get enough of America’s northwest. Fortunately, I’ve had layovers in Denver and Salt Lake City. The majestic mountains always leave me in awe. Our hotel in Salt Lake City was incredible. Who knew they had such swanky hotels in SLC? “Not I”, said I. My crew and I sat outside and ate dinner. See, there is the food-loving part of our airline again! The mountain air was refreshing. Well, if you overlooked the smog from the forest fires. We stayed at the airport hotel in Denver. Yessiree. The one attached to the airport. It was impressive, too. I stood outside on the patio deck while my chai tea latte was being prepared inside the cafe. It was gorgeous outside. Next time, I will give myself more time to linger. Until then, I will keep the Cowboy Channel on to feed my Montana soul. Yessiree. The horse power is impressive. The western pride is unwavering. The mutton bustin is gut-bustin hilarious. However, it’s seeing the cowboys and cowgirls anchored upon their horses that expands my western soul the most. It’s inexplicable for me. Yessiree. Some may say I’m crazy. I, on the other hand say, “Cowboy up”.

Cowboy Up

I’m Speechless

I distinctly remember the day I was riding in the car with my Mom and I decided to give up talking. We were living in Pittsburgh at the time. I remember I told my Mom a story. She never responded. I noticed this wasn’t the first time she did this. I remember thinking, “Why am I speaking if no one cares?” It was right then I decided to stop speaking. No one noticed for weeks. Heck, they didn’t notice for months. Then gain, maybe my family was just grateful for the silence. Maybe they didn’t want to say anything and ruin a good thing. It’s been a little over a year since I went back flying. And what a year it has been. I’ve flown with spectacular crews. I’ve had a couple phenomenal layovers. Mostly though, it’s been a year of no sleep. The number of mentally draining days on and off the airplane are too numerous to count. I’m plumb tuckered out. For weeks I’ve been counting the days until my vacation. What can I say? Well, I don’t have much to say these days. Yessiree, these days I am speechless simply because I am utterly exhausted.

I’m not noting to lie. This summer was a looonnnggg summer of flying. I know now I didn’t appreciate the summer of 2020. Staying at home watching the Hallmark Channel and the Cowboy Channel were the most taxing things I did. It was heavenly! The longest I had to wear my face mask was as long as it took me to circumnavigate the grocery store. We all know the store shelves were lacking a lot of products last summer. Thus, I didn’t have to wear my mask too long before I paid for my groceries and headed back to my car. Who knew I’d refer to those days as “the good ol’days”? I know we all have grown tired of wearing our face masks. I’m definitely tired of wearing my face mask. Some days I can have it on close to 20 continuous hours. I’m tired of not being able to see people’s smiles. I’m tired of not hearing people. I’m tired of not being heard. The masks have taken their toll on me. I’ve grown weary of trying to talk through them. I can honestly say for my sanity’s sake these past few weeks I’ve given up trying to talk through my mask all together. Yessiree….It’s happened folks. The face masks have rendered me speechless.

As you know, I am a commuter. So, I spend a lot of time in our crew lounge. The lounge is usually filled with Skytresses and Skyters. Incredibly, many days I don’t know anyone in the lounge. I spend hours sitting by myself. I blog. I look at Pinterest. I check out social media. I read. I spend countless hours just looking out the window watching the ramp personnel move luggage carts, move tugs, and marshal in airplanes. I watch pilots do their walk-arounds and wonder where they are about to take off to. I’m speechless the whole time. These days I start my three-day trips on Tuesdays. Some days I run into my Tuesday friends…..my friends that also fly on Tuesday. These are the days I talk and laugh. I’m not speechless on these days by far. Sadly, the days of seeing my Tuesday friends are few and far between. This fact is starting to weigh heavily on me. I’m very cognizant of the many hours I sit in the lounge speechless.

My View from the crew lounge. It’s kind of plane”, isn’t it?!

This past year we have lost several Skytresses and Skyters. Sadly several have committed suicide. Several have succumbed to COVID-19. One Skytress tragically died in a plane crash with her daughter while on vacation in Alaska. Remember my 30-hour trip to Little Rock in June? I was thrilled I’d be flying again with Shonda, my Skytress In-Charge. Shonda and I flew together several years ago when our airline computer system went caput. It was, as Ron would say…awful, awful, awful. However, Shonda and I laughed for three days. We laughed even more on our Little Rock trip in June. Less than four week later, on July, 12th, Shonda passed away in her sleep. She was 47. The shock of Shonda’s untimely death has left me speechless.

We all know September 11th was the 20th Anniversary of 9-11. Most people think about this day as the anniversary approaches each year. Skytresses and Skyters think about this day all year long. Especially, those of us that were working for an airline in 2001. This year the gravity of the anniversary seemed more heavy. How could it be 20 years….yet, still feel like yesterday? Skytresses and Skyters I know dread September 11th. As the anniversary was approaching this year, I wanted to talk less about the day. Instead I prayed more. I was grateful this year I wasn’t flying. Not because I was scared. No, I was just sad. I wanted to spend the day outside away from the television. I knew it would be much better for my soul. Later in the evening I did watch a documentary on the crews and passengers that perished that September day. I learned more about the crews, passengers and air traffic controllers from the documentary than I had previously known. I went to bed with a heavy heart. The next day I watched videos of sports teams and marching bands honoring those who died on September 11th. The love they all took to honor the departed and uplift the souls of the living was remarkable. I was proud to be an American. The feelings I had swirling through my heart and soul cannot be described. I simply know God gifted me with these indescribable glorious feelings. Yes. Some things we can’t explain. We just need to feel them.

I mentioned this year has been a year of no sleep. I calculated the sleep I’ve been averaging the past few weeks. In 96 hours….a four day period…..I slept about 12 hours. Five of those hours occurred one day. That’s the day I came in from my trip. Thursday evening until Friday morning I slept five hours. The remaining 7 hours of sleep I spread over the other 3 days. Wow…that’s a lot of math. Skytresses hate math. Well, at least this Skytress does! Incredibly, this has been my typical sleep pattern for months. I know this lack of sleep isn’t ideal or healthy. As a matter of fact, my body has been slowly shutting down. The past few weeks I’ve been feverish when I came home. One week after I walked into the house my body ached so much I didn’t have the energy to speak to anyone. I was up most of the night tossing and turning from the pain. I didn’t tell anyone. Instead I awoke the next day and I started completing my “to do” list. Have I ever mentioned that Skytresses hate “to do” lists? Well, at least this Skytress does! Yessiree. I loathe a “to do” list. When I see all the things I have to do on my “to do” list, I’m at a loss for words. Well, there is one word I can think of….but, it’s not very nice.

I wasn’t going to mention that I am on vacation. But, the cat is out of the bag. Yessiree. My Mom already knows I’m on vacation. Oh, boy! I know my family and closest friends are chuckling reading this. You see, without fail, whenever I have vacation my Mom either gets sick or ends up in the hospital. It’s uncanny. I’ve actually tried going on vacation a few times. Yep. I am the eternal optimist! Amazingly, I’ve had to return home early each time. This vacation I’m quietly going about my day tackling my “to do” list. Yep, the dreaded list. I’ve re-caulked the bathroom. Replaced the mini blinds in the garage. I repaired the concrete on the garage floor. I have battled the mole in the yard. Here’s hoping the Juicy Fruit gum trick works! I even replaced the doorbell button on the front of the house. Okay, I called it the “doorbell dinger” when I asked the gentleman at the hardware store where I could locate one. Fortunately, he understood what I was trying to say. Guess he is used to customers like me. Ron always told me “YouTube” has a video on how to fix everything. So, I watched and learned how to replace a doorbell dinger. And I did it…much to my Mom’s chagrin. She actually told me she would laugh when I shocked myself. I guess I shocked her instead. Oh, I crack myself up!

Oh, how I wish I had more things to laugh about these days. I admit. Things haven’t been very funny these past few months. I’m overly exhausted. Both in my body and soul. I think the young boy in the movie, “Sling Blade” best describes how I have been feeling lately. Frank says, “I’m too young to feel this old”. This line has resonated with me for awhile now. You see, I’m weary of cleaning up after everyone. I used to love cooking. Now it’s become a drudgery. I’m tired of politics and the animosity it has bread. I’m tired of all the negativity surrounding me. I know without a doubt, it’s slowly smothering me. I’m tired of rudeness. I’m tired of being spoken to harshly. I’m tired of feeling like I don’t matter. The past few months my creativity has been stifled. I look at Pinterest and nothing inspires me. Collectively, all these things have caused me to regressed in my words and in my actions. As you can see, none of this is funny.

I hear ya, John Coffee….I hear ya.

Thankfully, I do have a plan to get my Super Skytress mojo back. I call it my “Super Skytress Vacation Plan.” It’s very catchy, isn’t it? Yessiree. I’m trying my hardest this vacation to catch up on my “to do” list so I won’t feel overwhelmed like I have been. I’m trying to get back to eating healthy again. Good bye sugar, my old friend. I’ll see you only on Saturday….my cheat day. I’m trying to rediscover my creativity again. I’ve started with nature by planting fall containers. I can tell the soil is already grounding me. I’ve vowed not to walk past my art room. Instead, I will walk in and see where the right side of my brain takes me. I heard the call of an Almond Joy Cake to bake it. It was Saturday. So I baked it. Ron loved Almond Joys. It was an earthly-heavenly connection I need to fuel my soul. And it did. I can already tell extra slumber is regenerating my energy. Mostly, though, I hope my vacation will bring back my words. I am feverishly trying not to be speechless. I want to write about the fun side of life again. I promise. I WILL write about the fun side of life again. Yessiree. It is my deepest desire through my words to leave you speechless. For all the glorious reason.

My humor and positivity are coming back thanks to my “Super Skytress Vacation Plan”!