The Rerouted Skytress

One day, when I was a small girl, my Dad came into the kitchen before he headed off to work. I was eating my breakfast. My Dad came in to give me a kiss goodbye. I shrieked at him. “Dad! You can’t go to work! You forgot to shave the other side of your mustache off!” My Dad pretended he completely forgot to shave the other side of his mustache off and headed back upstairs to shave. Another day my Dad came into the kitchen when I was eating breakfast to give me a kiss goodbye. He was dressed in his suit and tie. His shoes were nicely polished. Again I shrieked. “Dad! You can’t go to work! You forgot to put your pants on!” Once again, my Dad pretended he completely forgot to put his pants on. Again he went back upstairs. My Dad always did silly things to make me laugh. Another time when I was younger I was sitting on the stairs. I have no idea now why I was sitting there. But, my Dad came over and told me to hop on….he was going to give me a piggy back ride. I was scared. Not scared of falling off. I was scared I was going to hurt my Dad. When I was younger I was much taller than kids my age. I was also a chubby girl. Kids at school made fun of me a lot. They would tell the other kids not to get too close to me. They said I would hurt them because I was so big. These were the thoughts going through my head when my Dad told me to hop on his back. Reluctantly I hopped on. My Dad carried me all around the house. I felt like a normal kid. This simple fatherly act has stayed with me all these years. These are some of the things I think about on Father’s Day now. Unfortunately, I don’t have my Dad here to celebrate with him in person.

My Dad loved baseball. It was an integral part of our lives growing up. When we were kids my parents took each of us to a nice restaurant by ourselves so we could have a special night with our parents. My Dad “suggested” we go to Johnny Bench’s restaurant. It had memorabilia from Johnny Bench’s baseball career. It also had a huge catcher’s mitt for a chair by the bar. To this day, I covet that chair. Because of this dinner, baseball catchers became my favorite players. I guess it is only appropriate when years later when we moved to St. Louis, we had season tickets 5 rows behind home plate. We had a great view of the catchers for years. My Dad would take us to most of the home games. On Sunday day games we would watch the game from the Stadium Club. My dad said it was great to get another perspective of the field. I know now, it was to get out of the heat. And when the Cardinals made it to the playoffs and World Series, he always took us so we could experience the thrill of post season baseball. My Dad also had Hall of Fame announcer Jack Buck make a special announcement my last night working for the Cardinals before I headed off to become a Skytress. I didn’t hear it, but, my friends on break heard it. My Dad truly wove baseball into every aspect of our lives.

My Dad also coached sports teams. He coached my brother Sean’s basketball team. At the end of the season my Dad gave out awards to the players. My brother got “the most confused player” award. My Dad said my brother didn’t know whether to listen to his coach or his Dad. My brother’ soccer team also won the Championship with my Dad as his head coach. Surprisingly, my Dad didn’t know anything about soccer. One of our neighbors played professional soccer. He asked my Dad if he would help coach the team. My Dad told him he didn’t know anything about soccer. Our neighbor told him he really just needed someone to help with the drills. My Dad agreed to help him. Then our neighbor got transferred. My Dad became the head coach. My Dad went to the library to get books on soccer. He read up on the game……but, mostly he told the boys to just play and have fun. They did and they won the Championship.

My Dad was also the Governor of Missouri…..for one day. My younger brother Brian was having an issue with his special school bus picking him up at our house. The Governor of Missouri had been in St. Louis one day visiting schools in the area. My Dad called up my brother’s school to talk to the woman in charge. She wasn’t there. So my Dad left a message for the woman asking her to call the Governor back. Of course, she called the Governor back immediately. My Dad anticipating the call answered the phone, “Governor Gaffney”. She laughed. She knew my Dad well. She also rectified the situation immediately. Years later, my Dad retired from the business world when he got cancer. Eventually, he got bored and went to work for the Special School District. My Dad always wanted to be a teacher. However, he didn’t think he could raise a family being a teacher. So he went into the business world. My Dad loved being a teacher’s aide for the autistic students. He never really told stories about his business ventures. But, every night he would come home with stories about his students. The students loved my Dad. When my Dad died the students planted a tree and created an outdoor sitting area in his honor.

I sold my house in Cincinnati when my Dad’s cancer came back for the last time. I was going to go back commuting and help my Mom take care of my Dad. However, the day I closed on my house, I went to our crew lounge. At the time our company was going through bankruptcy. They had offered voluntary furloughs to help save jobs. My friend was working at the duty desk that day. He told me the voluntary furlough window had been extended. It had closed prior to finding out my Dad’s cancer had come back. I told Billy I was going to the computer and put in for the furlough. He told me he had put in for his furlough earlier that morning, too. I know now going into the lounge that day was Devine intervention. On furlough I was able to take care of my Dad and let my Mom go to work. Interestingly enough, unlike my Mom, my Dad loved to cook. We would watch Paula Deen on the Food Network every afternoon in the family room. Sadly, with the cancer spreading, my Dad would eventually spend more time in his bedroom. All throughout the day I would check on him. I still remember how scared I was every time I would go in the room and he wasn’t awake. When I could see he was just sleeping….my heart would beat again. I didn’t sleep at night. I was always listening to hear if he was up. And I’d he was, I would breathlessly wait until he got safely back in bed. I was constantly worried his oxygen concentrator machine would stop working…..especially if there was bad weather. My Dad faithfully took care of us. I was going to do the same for him.

The day came when my Dad’s breathing got worse. His oxygen machine was not helping him. He thought it would be best if he went to the hospital. The next day my Dad’s doctor called to say we should contact hospice care. The whole family went to the hospital to be with my Dad. Late that night my brothers and I went home. My Mom and sister stayed at the hospital. I was emotionally exhausted when I got home. I put my head on my pillow and started to dose off to sleep. I had a clear image of my Dad standing before me. He was with my two best friend’s Dad. Bobby had passed away several years earlier. Bobby also worked for several Major League Baseball teams. My Dad wanted to go to a baseball game with Bobby. I told him it would be okay for him to go. Moments later the phone rang. It was my Mom calling to tell us my Dad had died.

We had a celebration of life Mass for my Dad several weeks after he died. We did not have a regular funeral. My Dad gifted his body to the St. Louis University Medical School. My Dad was all about education. My sister studied on bodies that had been gifted to the school. My Dad felt he needed to give back to the University. It was also important to him that the Medical students conducted a religious ceremony for the families each year. The medical students were taught to honor the gift of body donations. The ceremony was to honor the families and the gift donor. This ceremony was beautiful and extremely moving for our family. My Dad faithfully took care of us, even after his life on Earth was finished.

My Dad was a very proud Catholic. When Pope John Paul II came to St. Louis, he and my sister went to see him. I couldn’t have been more happy for my Dad to see the Pope in his hometown. It makes me smile now knowing my Dad not only got to see the Pope…but, he also got to see a future Saint. I like to think they have met in Heaven. I’m sure Pope John Paul came up to my Dad and asked…”Aren’t you Governor George Gaffney?”