The Rerouted Skytress

I was perfectly content knowing I had flown my last Anchorage trip for the season. Then out of habit I looked to see if we had any Anchorage trips for October. I’ll admit. I became instantly giddy when I saw we indeed had a couple Anchorage trips for October. Better yet, there was an Anchorage trip on a Tuesday. I typically fly Tuesday through Thursday. When I saw the trip, I emphatically knew Alaska was calling me to fly back there one more time. Needless to say, I put Anchorage down as my first trip choice. When our October bids came out several days later, I was ecstatic to discover I would be going back to Anchorage. Better yet. I’d be flying with my Skyter friend Wayne.

I flew my first Anchorage trip this summer with Skyter Wayne. We then flew another Anchorage trip together a few weeks later. If we weren’t flying together, we were still flying Anchorage trips every week. Yessiree. Skyter Wayne and I enthusiastically answered Alaska’s weekly call to come back to Anchorage. Fortunately for us, Skytress Lucy and Skytress Kenisha answered the call for this last Anchorage trip, too.

From the moment we met at the gate, I knew we were going to have a marvelous trip. Our excitement for laying over in Anchorage was palpable. When we learned Skytress Kenisha was bringing her boyfriend Ron on our trip to celebrate his birthday, we made him an honorary crew member. The five of us created such an instant bond, numerous passengers asked us if we flew together all the time. They said they never saw a flight crew having such fun flying together. That didn’t surprise us. Our primary objective on this trip was to have fun. Boy, did we have fun!

This trip to Anchorage was slightly different from my previous layovers. First, we were laying over at a different hotel. Yessiree. We were back at our airline’s beloved Anchorage layover hotel. I’ll admit. This hotel outshines the other hotel by the bushels. Plus, this hotel is located closer to the coveted Snow City Cafe. Alleluia and amen for this! The other noticeable differences on this trip were the changes in the weather and in the amount of daylight. The consistent upper 60 degree weather I enjoyed all summer was gone. The temperature now struggled to get above freezing. The sun, also, struggled to shine for 11 hours. This was a drastic change from the 23 hours of sunlight I had become accustomed to this summer. I’ll admit. I didn’t mind these changes in the least. In my mind, the new changes all added another layer to the Anchorage charm.

We all agreed to meet early in the morning to have breakfast at the Snow City Cafe. Out of habit I checked the wait list at the cafe before I left my room. I couldn’t believe there wasn’t a wait time. I, also, couldn’t believe how dark it was outside when we headed to the restaurant at 7:30 am. The sun was still fast asleep. Amazingly, it was well past 8am before the sun started to make her appearance. I was flabbergasted by this fact. Even more amazing was the fact the Snow City Cafe had available seating the entire time we were there. This summer the restaurant was always filled to the gills with lively patrons eating…..and patrons waiting to get a table. We took advantage of the empty restaurant and relaxed atmosphere. We lingered in our booth after we finished eating our breakfast and swapped numerous stories. One flying story led to another….and to another. What can I say? Skytresses and Skyters are known for telling the best flying stories. Our crew bond grew tighter with each story we told. Our laughter grew heartier with each story we told. Heck, yes. It was the perfect way to start the day in Anchorage.

Skytress Kenisha and Ron scheduled a sightseeing trip to see glaciers, the rain forest and the animal conservatory. So, after breakfast we parted our ways. Skytress Lucy, Skyter Wayne and I hung out in the city with the local Anchoragites. The tourists were almost nonexistent. Well, except for the three of us. The three of us happily zig-zagged from one shop to another. I bought a fury winter hat I had been eyeing for weeks. Skytress Lucy bought a sweatshirt for herself and a pooping moose for her nephew. Skyter Wayne bought a vase from Paul Newman’s estate and a unique Iditarod pocket watch. We all bought Samovar tea. Heck. It wouldn’t be a trip to Anchorage if we didn’t. We planned on having baked Alaska ice cream cones from Wild Scoops. Sadly, we discovered they were closed for the season. We, also, discovered the fishermen weren’t fishing in Ship Creek. We consoled ourselves by taking selfies in the middle of the streets with the snow capped mountains in the background. The mountains glistened all around us. I swear the mountains looked even closer than they had all summer long. Even Denali seemed closer. Yessiree. We had a perfect view of Denali on this trip. Thankfully, Mother Nature gave us a crystal clear day to see all the glorious mountains surrounding the city. Everywhere I looked I saw one spectacular view after another. I’ll admit. I was completely in my winter-loving element. I couldn’t stop smiling. Yessiree. I walked around all day with a dopey smile on my face.

The next morning the crew van was filled with laughter as we exchanged stories with each other. Skytress Kenisha and Ron shared the most incredible pictures from their tour. We enthusiastically filled them in on our adventures….and how we didn’t stop Skyter Wayne from purchasing items in every store we walked into. Of course, we laughed about the pooping moose. Skytress Lucy showed our pilots the pooping moose she bought for her nephew. They couldn’t contain their laughter over it either. Heck. It’s a pooping moose! Pooping moose bring out the inner kid in all of us. Of course, we took our crew pictures with the moose in the airport before we headed to our gate. This time, though, we took a picture standing next to the moose’s bum. What can I say? Pooping moose and moose butts brought out the inner kid in all of us.

I’m so grateful everyone on my crew heard Alaska calling them. I definitely have a another suitcase full of new Anchorage memories. More importantly, Skytress Lucy, Skytress Kenisha and honorary Skyter Ron have become amazing new friends to Skyter Wayne and me. Alaska may be called the last frontier. But, I choose to think of Alaska as the place where lasting friendships are created. I looked to see if we had any Anchorage trips for November. Sadly, we do not. I’ll keep looking each month though. I know Alaska will be calling sooner than later. I definitely can’t wait to answer the call and head back to Anchorage. I have more adventures to experience and more forever friendships to discover. So, until then, I’ll keep my phone on.

The first day of fall was on Saturday. I couldn’t be happier. Skytresses and Skyters know summertime flying is the hardest flying of the year. Our airplanes are full. Plus, Mother Nature loves to send nasty weather anywhere our airplanes are headed. Thus, reroutes are inevitable. Needless to say, our schedules are packed with trips, whether we want them to be or not. Skytresses and Skyters can become quite exasperated with summertime flying if they don’t have a vacation to break up the summertime craziness. I’ll admit. I no longer take a summer vacation. So, I swear the four months of summertime flying actually feels like three years for me. I typically try to block out the fact it is summertime flying. Heck. There are many summers I don’t recollect. Skytresses and Skyters like to reminisce about how bad summer flying was the previous years. Astonishingly, I recall nothing. Except for the fact I survived each summer of flying. Egads. I don’t need to remember the details of how awful the flying was or how I survived it all. The mere fact I survived is good enough for me.

I’m confident I will remember most of my flying this summer simply because I was flying Anchorage trips. Flying Anchorage trips can’t be categorized as typical summertime flying. No siree. One doesn’t survive Anchorage trips, one relishes every spectacular moment. However, there are a few non-Anchorage trips I’d like to forget…and with a few more fall days under my belt, I most certainly will. Thankfully for you, my brain won’t release these summertime memories just yet. Heck. I still have flashbacks to my Denver trip. As Ron would say, that trip was awful, awful, awful. Yes, indeed. My crew and I were rerouted to work a flight to LaGuardia because the original crew timed out. Of course, we were informed about our reroute as we were about to head to our hotel for a layover after a long day of flying. Ultimately, we stayed on the airplane at the gate with passengers for several hours because of storms and lightning in the Denver area. Then we timed out because we reached our 15 hour duty limitation. Incredibly, the flight was never canceled. No siree. The flight was delayed until we had our legal rest. Then we reunited with the same passengers who spent the night in the Denver airport and worked the flight to JFK. Yes. I said JFK. JFK was the original destination of the passengers the day before…only Mother Nature forced the hands of those in charge and miraculously a JFK destination became a LaGuardia destination. Since Mother Nature was feeling much better after a night of raging storms, our LaGuardia flight reverted back to JFK. I know. It’s crazy. Just as crazy was the 10,000 steps my crew and I logged between our arrival gate in JFK to our gate for our deadhead flight back to Atlanta. Fortunately, we made this flight in the nick of time. I thank my angels in Reroute Heaven for this miracle. Yessiree. Thanks to them I was able to catch the last flight home and I wasn’t forced to spend the night in the crew lounge……again.

Spending the night in the crew lounge is never fun. This kind of slumber party is never really a party. For one thing, it means you missed your flight home. For another thing, there isn’t any slumber. There is commiseration though with other Skytresses and Skyters in the same situation. So, at least there is that. My slumber party was the direct result of a lack of communication on the part of the crew van company. They never communicated to a driver to pick us up after we got rerouted and had to layover in downtown Atlanta. Incredibly, our airline had communicated with the crew van company numerous times the day before and that morning to make sure we had a driver scheduled. Fortunately, a kind gentleman driver was rerouted to pick us up after he picked up two pilots across the street. Unfortunately, the delay in our pickup caused us to get stuck in the atrocious Atlanta afternoon traffic. Our flight to West Palm Beach was put on a rolling delay until we made it to the airport. Unfortunately, the delay enabled Mother Nature to whip up a nasty storm over West Palm Beach for our arrival. It felt like an eternity waiting for Mother Nature to give up on her weather wrath. My flight home was long gone by the time we landed back in Atlanta. Don’t feel too bad for me though. I slumbered in the crew lounge with my Skytress friend Kellie who missed her flight home because of weather. Yessiree. We sat in our makeshift chair- beds and talked most of the night. I, also talked with my commuter Skytress friend, Agnes. Agnes and her crew had been rerouted. They were hanging out in the crew lounge waiting for a hotel assignment. Their Skytress In-Charge waited on hold for several hours for crew accommodations to answer…so, Agnes and I had plenty of time to chitchat. After Agnes and her crew left I kept myself entertained by watching the reactions of the Skytresses and Skyters as they came into the crew lounge to start their duty day. They were shocked to see the crew lounge had become a makeshift hotel for ill-fated Skytresses and Skyters. My luck did rebound a wee bit on my flight home. I was blessed to have a wonderful crew working my flight. I did have to sit on the jumpseat after my slumber-less party in the crew lounge. But, I was blessed I had the jumpseat. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have made it home that day either. Yessiree. Every flight home was full. Every jumpseat home was booked. Ah, the joys of summertime flying!

My last trip before my vacation I, also, went illegal due to duty limitation rules. I’ll admit. I was hopeful we would go unscathed by the reroute gods on this trip. Yes. On our last day we were scheduled to fly to Newark before we flew back to Atlanta to finish our trip. Still, I had high hopes we’d make it to Atlanta on time. Heck. I was even hoping for an early arrival. Mother Nature must have caught wind that I was going on vacation for a few weeks and it put her in a foul mood. Yessiree. She wouldn’t have an opportunity to put another devious weather system in my path for awhile and it obviously ticked her off. So, what did she do? Well, she created a weather system so evil that it caused ground stoppages in Newark….for hours. Part of her sinister plan was to initially give us all hope that we would make it to Newark on time. I’ll admit. I sat on my jumpseat with a huge smile on my face when the Captain announced we were number three for takeoff. In a few short hours I would officially be on vacation. Alleluia! I now know the sound I thought was the engines revving up was actually Mother Nature’s guttural laughter reverberating outside the airplane as she flipped her weather switch. Egads. Mother Nature caused such a weather frenzy air traffic control in Newark was forced to extend numerous ground stoppages The extended ground stoppage then forced scheduling to reroute us. Instead of going to Atlanta, we would be laying over in Newark. Yessiree. Scheduling had given up any hope that we would make it back to Atlanta. Unfortunately, this awful reroute would get me back home to St. Louis mid- afternoon the next day. Of course, The Rerouted Skytress found this reroute unacceptable. So, I put in a request with my angels in Reroute Heaven. I knew there was a morning flight from Detroit to St. Louis that I could take home. However, I needed to layover in Detroit for this to happen. Well, alleluia. My angels in Reroute Heaven made it happen. I’ll admit. They had a hard plan to execute. Mother Nature is a formidable opponent. She kept giving the powers that be hope that the weather would clear up. Thankfully, Reroute Heaven stalled her weather system with heavenly force. In the end my crew and I had to wait several more excruciating hours at the gate with our passengers. But, we eventually hit the maximum duty time of 15 hours. Scheduling released us to go to the airport hotel in Detroit. They also granted my deviated from our scheduled deadhead to Atlanta in the morning. Yessiree. I would be able to take a flight directly home to St. Louis. I’ll admit. I’m not a fan of my 3-day trips turning into a 4-day trip. Especially when I am going on vacation. Nonetheless, I was grateful. I was grateful for my angels in Reroute Heaven. I was grateful I was going on vacation. I was grateful I wouldn’t see an airport for weeks. Mostly, I was grateful I survived my 34th year of summer flying.

Sadly, this vacation hasn’t been without sorrow. It is with a heavy heart that I am writing this blog. Ron’s dad passed away on September 13th. Papa Ed, as I affectionately called him, was the kindest, most caring, sweet-witted gentleman. He religiously read my blog and faithfully commented on each one. Words cannot express how much this meant to me. I loved texting Papa Ed when I was about to start a trip. Ron used to text his Dad his whereabouts when he was out flying. Every once in awhile Ron would mistakenly send the text to me instead of his Dad. This always made me laugh. Without fail, it made me appreciate Ron’s beautiful relationship he had with his Dad even more. I always hoped Ron was smiling in Heaven as I continued his tradition of texting Papa Ed where I was headed on my trips. I always felt Papa Ed’s fatherly love when he would text me back and tell me to be safe and to have a good trip. Papa Ed’s texts and phone conversations always made my Irish eyes smile. Usually he would pass along a story about Ron that would either make me laugh out loud or deeply touch my heart. Inevitably, Papa Ed’s stories would make me love Ron and the Paden family even more. I know without a doubt God compassionately had Papa Ed help me with my grief. I pray I helped Papa Ed with his grief, too. I know Papa Ed is in Heaven with Ron and Mama Linda. I can only imagine the glorious reunion that took place when Papa Ed entered Heaven. I like to think Ron has lovingly moved another seat into his Reroute Heaven office so Papa Ed can sit beside him. I know Papa Ed will enthusiastically assist Ron, Mama Linda and my Dad work their reroute magic whenever it is imperative. Without a doubt, I will continue to marvel at their creativity and dedication to make sure The Rerouted Skytress is lovingly taken care of. I am truly blessed that God continues to let my angels manage the Reroute Heaven office. I know God has graciously left them to their own devices, too. I am utterly grateful for this autonomy. Yessiree. With God’s backing and their perseverance I have been the recipient of many Heavenly reroute miracles. I may say I don’t know how I survived summer flying. But, I really do. God and my angels in Reroute Heaven are the ones I need to thank. With Papa Ed as the newest member in the Reroute Heaven department I may become a huge fan of summer flying. Or at least loathe it less….Which is still a miracle in my book.

I am a proud Montana gal. Yessiree. I have a deep propensity for the West. Mountains, cowboys, rodeos….they all speak to my native Montanan heart. However, for 6 weeks this summer, this Montana gal felt more like a gal from Alaska. I’ll admit. I ate my fair share of crab, salmon, Yak burgers….and baked Alaska ice cream. I would reactively looked skyward whenever I heard bush planes flying overhead, wondering if I knew the person at the controls. I quickly learned to tell the time of day based on the train whistle as it departed or arrived at the Anchorage Depot. As I went about my day, I would casually search the horizon for a view of the very elusive Denali. Heck. I even learned to sleep without darkness outside my window. And just like a true Alaskan, I anticipated a moose crossing my path at the drop of a dime. Yessiree. I had a blast hanging out in Alaska with my fellow Skytresses and Skyters. I had so much fun being an honorary Alaskan this summer….this Montana gal plans to return to Anchorage next summer to do it all again.

The best thing about flying to Anchorage is that everyone on the crew is excited to explore the city. It’s infectious! Heck. Not one Skytress or Skyter batted an eye whenever we made plans to meet in the lobby at 7am to go to breakfast at the Snow City Cafe. Okay. Maybe we silently batted an eye. But, we all showed up in the lobby at 7am! If you are not familiar with the Snow City Cafe, you need to know one very important detail. Local Anchoragites and tourists flock to the infamous Snow City Cafe everyday. Thus, each week, our goal was to beat them all to the restaurant. I’m proud to report we were victorious each week. I’ll admit. The taste of victory is even sweeter when it is served with a delectable egg omelette filled with crab and a hot cup of Milky Way Mocha on the side.

My first trip to Anchorage Skyter Wayne, Skytress Kari, Skytress Kelly and I decided to rent bikes and ride The Tony Knowles Coastal Trail. The bike path hugs the Anchorage coastline one way for 11 miles. Of course, we told each other that we were excited to ride the bike path and get a feel for Anchorage. If truth be told….we were going on a moose hunt. Heck. Even the owner of the bike shop guaranteed we would see a moose. Skyter Wayne told us he saw several moose on his last bike ride. I’ll admit. The possibility of seeing a moose thrilled me and scared me at the same time. For 22 miles, I kept my eyes peeled for moose hanging out along the trail. I’m sad to report we didn’t encounter any moose. Nope. Not even one pooping moose! “Pooping moose” was our rally call all month long thanks to Skyter Wayne. Don’t feel too bad for us though. We did have a Denali sighting from the coast line…which is a very rare thing indeed. Yessiree. It more rare than seeing a moose! On our ride back to town I bought several photographs from a local artist. I’ll admit. It’s been a month of Sundays since I last road a bike. But, I was determined to get myself and my photographs safely back to town. I figured if Captain Cook could navigate a boat around unexplored Alaska, I could navigate a bike down a smoothly paved bike trail holding on to photographs. I know Captain Cook wouldn’t have been impressed. But, my crew sure was! Afterwards, we went to the 49th State Brewery for dinner. The rooftop dining area that overlooks the coastline and Alaskan Railway Depot became the new neighborhood hangout for me and my crews for the following weeks.

My second Anchorage trip I was without my friends, Skyter Wayne, Skytress Kelly and Skytress Kari. However, in true Skyter Wayne form, Wayne texted me to see what was on my agenda for this layover. Wayne heartily approved everything I had planned. My Skytress In-Charge, Ni-col, accompanied me on my adventures. We met up with Skytress Cynthia and took a trolly ride around Anchorage. It was on this ride that I finally saw a pooping moose. Mr. Moose was in the distance eating. Mr. Moose could have cared less that we were watching him eat. In contrast, we were ecstatic. Sadly, this would be my lone moose sighting in Anchorage. Well, except for the moose in the Anchorage airport that greeted us each week. He was the best pooping moose of all the pooping moose in Anchorage. Yessiree. He didn’t flinch even once when we stood next to him to get a crew photo!

Skytress Ni-col and I headed to the Ulu factory after our trolly tour. I regretted not buying an Ulu knife years ago when I was in Fairbanks. I wasn’t going to let this happen again. So, I didn’t. An Ulu knife was traditionally used by Alaska Natives to skin and clean animals, cut food and even cut blocks of snow and ice to make an igloo. I don’t anticipate using my Ulu knife to make an igloo. I think I’ll just use the rounded knife to chop my herbs and possibly chocolate bars for baking.

We learned on our Anchorage trolly tour that Alaskans consume more ice cream per capita than any state. So, the fact there are two Wild Scoops ice cream locations within one block of our hotel didn’t seem excessive in the least. Wild Scoops is know for their creative flavors. They use innovative ingredients in their ice cream such as spruce tips and fireweed. Mostly, though, they are known for their baked Alaska ice cream cones. My first taste of a baked Alaska ice cream cone came after Skytress Ni-col and I walked back from Ship Creek where we watched the fishermen fly fish. I’ll admit. This trip to Wild Scoops was the first of many this summer. As an honorary Alaskan, I felt it was my civic duty to take all my crew members here and force them to get a baked Alaska waffle cone. Funny, not one person complained. No siree. They were too busy enjoying the delectable marshmallow topping.

Skyter Wayne and I flew to Anchorage the following week. Our Skyter In-Charge, Yessid, joined us for our layover adventures….starting with breakfast at the Snow City Cafe. We happily did some shopping before we went on another trolly tour. It was Skyter Yessid’s first time to Anochorage and we wanted him to get a great feel for the city. Afterwards Skyter Wayne walked us over to The Kobuk. It’s a unique gift shop and cafe. I wanted to try their famous house blend Samovar tea. I learned Samovar tea originated with the Russians. Samovar is actually the vessel the tea is brewed in. The Kobuk Samovar tea has been hand-blended for over 50 years. It contains cinnamon, cinnamon oil, cloves and orange. It has a slight sweetness to it, although, it doesn’t contain any sugar. Of course, I bought some Samovar tea to take home. I’ll admit. I bought more Samovar tea several weeks later. What can I say? I’m a tea connoisseur. Plus, the tea smells absolutely incredible and tastes absolutely Devine! Each week I happily walked my crews to The Kobuk. Not surprisingly, they would happily purchase packages of Samovar tea to take home, too. What can I say? As an honorary Alaskan this was always a proud moment for me.

Alaskans and honorary Alaskans such as myself know winter isn’t the only time inclement weather materializes in The Last Frontier. Unfortunately, Mother Nature reared her ugly head on several layovers. But, a little rain didn’t stop us from having fun. No siree, Bob. We came prepared with umbrellas! Take that Mother Nature. Skytress Jenet and I took advantage of the foul weather on one of our layovers and went to the Anchorage Museum. The Alaska Native artifacts and the narrative videos were extremely informative. I still cannot fathom how Alaska Natives survived the dark, cold winters in remote areas years ago. Heck. I marvel at how they still endure harsh winters in the extremely remote areas of Alaska. The Alaskan fortitude will forever flabbergast this Montana gal.

My last trip to Anchorage we affectionately called, “The Wayne Tour”…named after our beloved Skyter friend Wayne. Sadly, Skyter Wayne wasn’t on our last layover. Happily, we stayed in contact with Skyter Wayne throughout the day to keep him abreast of all our adventures. Of course, the first texts from Skytress Jenet, Skytress Suzy and me to Skyter Wayne came from the Snow City Cafe. Yessiree. We couldn’t have started the Skyter Wayne Palooza tour anywhere else. Afterwards, we hit multiple gift shops in Skyter Wayne’s honor. We enthusiastically devoured some baked Alaska ice cream cones at Wild Scoops. Later in the day we headed over to our old stomping ground, the 49th State Brewery for drinks and dinner to round out “The Wayne Tour”. Skytress Suzy and I threw caution to the wind and ordered the yak burger. Each week our waitresses had recommended this burger. Each week I passed on the burger. I couldn’t get over the name or the picture of the yak looking back at me from the menu. I’ll admit. Skytress Skytress Suzy and I were pleasantly impressed with the yak burger. As Skytress Suzy liked to say, …we didn’t yak from the yak burger. No siree. It was scrumptious!

I had a slight pain in my Montanan heart the morning of my last Anchorage layover. The locals I meet and saw on my many layovers had become my new found friends. I’ll admit. I loved tooling around the city like a local Anchoragite. I loved dropping into the Fire Island Bakeshop to grab an Alaskan scone to eat on my flight home to St. Louis. I adored having dinner outside on the roof top at the 49th Street Brewery surrounded by mountains and the coast of Alaska. Heck. On my first layover daylight was the norm at bedtime. My last layover Alaska was quickly transitioning into it’s nearly 24 hours of darkness. Yessiree. Each day the daylight diminished by 5 minutes. I’ll admit. I was going to miss this weekly daylight transition. Just like so many things in Alaska….It was utterly fascinating.

I know without a doubt I will head back to Anchorage next year. Heck. It’s a great place to be to beat the summer heat. Yessiree. The 60 degree weather was a beautiful reprieve from the hot humid weather at home. I’ll admit. I already have plans for my future layovers. I plan to venture out on the Alaska Railroad and explore the glaciers in Prince William Sound. I promised myself I would eat some reindeer sausage they cook and sell on the streets of Anchorage. For some reason my mind and belly wouldn’t allow me partake this summer. However, I have it on great authority from Skyter Yessid that the reindeer is better than the hot dogs sold on the streets of New York. Now that is an endorsement from a New Yorker that cannot be disregarded.

I want to thank my fellow Skytress and Skyter friends for an awesome summer. (I’m pretty confident they are reading this blog post). Each week I commuted off to work with a smile on my face. I knew I was going to have a grand time in Alaska. Without fail, I did thanks to them. We laughed. We explored. We ate….maybe a wee bit too much. Their excitement fueled my excitement for our Anchorage layovers. Happily, I have a suitcase full of exceptional memories from my Anchorage layovers. I don’t know how we are all going to work the same Anchorage trips next year. But, we all know Skytresses and Skyters are miracle workers. So, I am confident it will happen. Yessiree. Our Anchorage Adventures await us. Well, I should say our Alaskan Adventures await us. If we get our Juneau trips back next summer, we will have to bid them. I’ll admit. I have plans in place for this layover as well. What can I say? This Montana gal can’t get the Alaska gal out of her.

The perfect layover for me is when I have so much fun that I start creating my agenda for my next layover in that city. This is what happened last time I had a long Charleston layover. I started creating a new layover agenda before we left the hotel for the airport. Thankfully, the bidding gods took favor with me and I got a long Charleston layover this month. Happily, I had a few hours in the morning to execute my Charleston agenda. I did have to keep a blistering pace to fit it all in. Heck. My pace was so blistering, I actually got blisters on the soles of my feet! Okay. I’ll admit. The blisters were from not packing socks to wear with my Converse shoes. Still, I blistered through my blisters and had an excellent adventure in Charleston.

You may remember from my last Charleston layover that I walked by America’s oldest liquor store, Tavern at Rainbow Row. Heck. I even took a photograph of the shop as I passed by it. Later, I cursed myself for not actually walking inside to check it out. Thus, this was the top priority for this layover. My other priority was to purchase something in the liquor store. Yessiree. I rather liked the idea that I was going to get liquor from the same store where pirates used to get their liquor in 1686. Aye, aye Mateys! Skytress Karen and I left the hotel early and walked to the liquor store. I’ll admit. We were both shocked when we walked inside. The store was the size of the first-class cabin on a Boeing 737-900. We walked into an adjoining room thinking there was more to the store. However, we quickly learned it was just the storage room. Skytress Karen and I immediately realized the shop only sold hard liquor. Our plan for purchasing a bottle of wine was squashed. Nonetheless, I was determined to purchase something. I didn’t want to spend $75 on a bottle of hard liquor I wasn’t going to drink. So, instead, I spent $25 on four petite jars of Moonshine samples from South Carolina. I’ll admit. If it wasn’t for the fact I had to fly later in the day, I would have drank one of those moonshine samples right there. Shiver me timbers, Mateys! I could feel the awful burning sensation on my left heel. Egads! My left heel was quickly being rubbed raw from not having any socks on with my shoes. Yessiree. I was starting to think walking the plank would be less painful than walking the streets of Charleston.

Despite my blistering feet, Skytress Karen and I continued walking around Charleston. We happily admired the colonial architecture and the assortment of beautiful window boxes we passed along the streets. Not surprisingly, we were fascinated with each church we passed. I was amazed by the number of churches I had not seen before. Then again, I shouldn’t have been. After all, Charleston is the City of Churches. I mentally vowed to visit several of these churches on my next layover and learn about their history. I faithfully said a few prayers at each church we passed. I’ll admit. I even prayed for my shoes to stop rubbing my feet. After all, I still had more stops to make before we headed back to the hotel for our pickup.

Skytress Karen and I eventually walked back towards the Charleston City Market. The historical City Market is a Skytress delight. Yessiree. The Market is several blocks long. Vendors and artisans are lined up for blocks on each side of the market. My Skytress shopping heart always starts to beat faster when I get near the City Market. I was barley inside the market when I noticed some intriguing jewelry. The unique coloring of the pieces caught my interest. The lovely woman standing behind the long table explained her sister made the jewelry. She then showed me some jewelry pieces her sister made from copper pennies. The pennies ranged from 2004 and prior. I learned her sister, Michelle Black, can only use pure copper pennies to create her jewelry pieces. Pennies produced after 2004 contain zinc. They can’t be heated like pure copper pennies can be. Those of you that know me, know I love finding my pennies from Heaven. I’ll admit. The table full of pennies definitely spoke to my heart. I knew I had to buy a penny necklace. So, I did!

I knew I wanted to stop by Callie’s Hot Little Biscuit while we were in the City Market. I had put Callie’s on my “must return to” list when I took my first bite of my biscuit on my last Charleston layover. My egg, pimento and sausage biscuit was yummy-delicious. I had been craving this biscuit since that last layover. I told Skytress Karen my Callie’s Biscuit was going to be my meal for the day. Yessiree. Little biscuit is a misnomer. My last Callie’s Hot Little Biscuit was huge. I knew this same biscuit would sustain me until we got to Sacramento. Skytress Karen didn’t get a Callie’s Biscuit. I’ll admit. I felt sad for her. She didn’t know what she was missing. However, I did. My sweet readers….Don’t make Skytress Karen’s mistake. Always get a Callie’s Biscuit when you see it. Your tummy will thank me!

I had one more mandatory stop on my “must return to” list. I needed to stop to get some salt water taffy. I’ll admit. I always get salt water taffy from River Street Sweets when I am in Charleston or in Savannah. This trip I was flying with Skytress Suzanne. Skytress Suzanne told me her husband’s family owns River Street Sweets. Sweet! Now that I have flown with Skytress Suzanne, I can tell myself I am supporting a fellow Skytress with each purchase. It’s much better than telling myself I have an affinity for salt water taffy.

The City Market and River Street Sweets are located next to our new layover hotel. You can bet your sweet bippy I was relieved I had blistered through my list of things I wanted to do on this layover…..and had ended up smack dab next to our hotel. I’ll admit. I was ready to head back to the hotel and kick my shoes off for awhile before we had to fly to Sacramento. However, Skytress Karen wanted to walk a round a little more. So, of course, I made the poor decision to continue walking around Charleston. My left heel had stopped bleeding with my new gait, anyway. What can I say? My love for Charleston outweighs my love for my feet.

Of course, I knew I had abused my feet on my Charleston layover. However, it wasn’t until I got to my hotel room in Sacramento that I discovered I had blisters on the soles of both of my feet. Egads! I told myself next time I had a Charleston layover I would make sure I packed socks to wear with my layover shoes. Yessiree. The only type of blistering I want to do on my next Charleston layover is, ….blistering to fit in all the new adventures on my agenda list.

I remember the first time I met Ron. I was jumpseating from St. Louis to Atlanta to go to work. As I was putting my suitcase in the overhead bin, Ron started walking up the aisle towards me. I smiled at him and said, “Hi. I’m Eileen….your jumpseater”. Ron smiled back at me and said, “Hello. I’m Ron”. As Ron said hello, I distinctly remember God tapping me on the shoulder. God whispered in my ear. “Pay attention to this person”. My heart remembers this moment like it happened seconds ago. The days, months and years that followed this simple first exchange between Ron and me were filled with a myriad of extraordinary firsts. Not surprisingly, Ron and I looked forward to a lifetime of firsts and growing old together. We often joked there would come a time when we would be too old to do anything but sit on the porch and reminisce about the remarkable blessings we shared together. I cherished this thought then. I cherish this thought now for completely different reasons.

“But the thing about the last time… Is you don’t know that it’s the last time till it is”

One of the best perks of being a Skytress is not having to worry about what I am going to wear to work. Especially on the days when I have to get up at 2:45 am. When I was looking through pictures for my last blog post, I smiled at the different uniforms I’ve worn over the past 34 years. Some smiles were elicited because I loved the uniform. Some were elicited because thankfully I no longer had to wear the uniform. Ron repeatedly told me what his Dad told him once…make sure you choose a job where you like the uniform….for you will have to wear it everyday. When I became a Skytress we wore navy uniforms. I love navy. I could wear navy every day. Unfortunately, our uniforms are now gray. Oh, well. At least I still don’t have worry about what I am going to wear to work.

My favorite Skytress uniform was my first Skytress uniform. It was classic navy. Everyone looked sharp wearing this uniform. And that’s not an easy task to accomplish when you have thousands of Skytresses and Skyters that come in every shape and size. Although it was a uniform, I could express my individuality with my choice of blouse and neckwear. If the mood struck me, I could choose to tie a neck scarf around my neck with my crisp white blouse. However, this was always the cumbersome choice. Getting the scarf to look nice was more work than it was worth most days. To this day I am still baffled how Skytresses made rosettes out of their scarf and wore it around their necks. I usually wore a crew neck blouse with a color band that could be woven through the neckline. Or I would wear a blouse with a blue airline tab we buttoned at our neck between the collar. These options were definitely less technical for me. I’ll admit. Much to my chagrin…there were a few times I buttoned my blue tab backwards. I would usually discover this faux pas after a leg or two of flying when I would go into the lavatory. My immediate response would be embarrassment. That would morph into laughter. Fortunately, I discovered early on, either people didn’t notice or didn’t care about my backwards blue tab. Yessiree. There is something to be said about a uniform. We all look alike, even if we have our uniform pieces on backwards.

Sadly our blue uniform was replaced by a gray and indigo uniform. We affectionately called it “the prison uniform”. You know the saying, “never let them see you sweat”? Well, with this uniform everyone knew when you were sweating. Egads! During the summertime we all had dark, sweaty, underarm pit marks. Believe me. This isn’t the type of uniformity you want from your airline crews. Skytresses and Skyters would go into the lavatories to try to dry the pit marks with the air vents by the sink. Sadly, this was usually futile. Heck. We needed turbo engines to dry these shirts between flights!

We were ecstatic when we went back into navy uniforms with our Richard Tyler uniforms. Even more exciting was the Skytress blouse had a red band at the bottom. The blouse was designed to not be tucked in. Alleluia! The signature red Skytress dress really stood out. However, I don’t think Richard Tyler had me in mind when he designed the red dress. One had to be a contortionist to get into it and then contort even more to zip it up in the back. Interestingly, Richard Tyler didn’t have me in mind when he designed our apron, either. During the fashion show to announce our new uniforms there was a model wearing the apron as a dress. Egads! I’ll admit. I never wore the Richard Tyler apron. Not as an apron, or as a dress.

There was a time most Skytresses and Skyters, including myself, wore our uniform aprons on every flight. By golly, aprons were a necessity when we served meals in the main cabin. I’ll admit. Things got really messy when we stacked three passenger meal trays at a time to bring back to the galley. Holy moly. Our aprons would be covered with sauces, soups, liquids from passenger drinks and fluffy icing from the decadent desserts we served. The person stuffing the meal trays into the carriers would definitely get the brunt of the mess. That position should have come with hazard pay. Our aprons came in handy during the beverage services, too. We would stuff our aprons with either peanuts, pretzels, snack mix or our famous Biscoff cookies. The goal was to pack as many snacks into your apron pockets as you could and still be able to walk down the aisle. Fortunately, these days, we have snack side saddles. The saddles hang on the sides of the beverage carts with the snacks inside. Clever, I know! The best part of the side saddles is that I no longer need to pack my apron in my flight bag. Yippee!

I no longer have to pack an extra pair of shoes in my flight bag, either. Double yippee! When I first started flying Skytresses had to wear high heel concourse shoes. The heels had to be at least an inch and a half high. Before we started our meal or beverage services we could change into our on board flat shoes. Heck. I spent more time changing my shoes during the day than Mr. Rogers did. One day I was walking through the Atlanta airport with my Skytress friend, Michelle. The heel broke off Michelle’s concourse shoe. I asked Michelle if she wanted to change into her flats. She said no. She didn’t want to get into trouble for wearing her flats on the concourse. Instead, she hobbled to our next gate with her broken heel. Years later we heard about a New York Skytress that would travel with one broken-heeled concourse shoe. She would keep the shoe at the ready in her flight bag. Yessiree. This Skytress would wear her comfortable on board shoes everywhere. If someone question her about wearing her flat shoes on the concourse, she would whip out the one shoe from her bag and tell them she broke the heel on her concourse shoe. Thus, she had to wear her flats everywhere. Genius!

Skytresses and Skyters are supposed to be in uniform compliance at all times. I’ll admit. We aren’t. Years ago in Cincinnati we had to stand in front of supervisors before we signed in for every trip. The supervisors would make sure we were in uniform compliance. They were sticklers on Skytresses earrings and Skytresses hair length. Earrings couldn’t be larger than a quarter. Hair had to be above the shoulder. The Skyters had to wear their pocket scarves with their blazers. Skyters were notorious for not wearing them. Thankfully, for all of us, the mandatory uniform checks eventually became more random. This randomness bode well for Ron. Ron was notorious for not wearing his uniform blazer. Yessiree. Ron carried his blazer almost everywhere neatly folded over his arm. Fortunately, Ron was extremely tall and muscular. Most people were distracted by his height and muscles. Thus, they didn’t realize he wasn’t wearing his mandatory uniform blazer. Again….Genius!

Ron and I were skeptical when we saw the design of our current Zach Posen uniforms. I believe Ron’s exact words were, “I’ll quit before I wear this uniform”. The original design of the Skyter blazer had epaulets on the shoulders. Ron repeatedly said it looked like a bellhop’s uniform. Fortunately for Ron and the other Skyters, the epaulets were removed in the final design. Zach Posen’s original Skytress uniform was designed with multiple gray and purple uniform pieces. However, the final Skytress uniform design our company went with, consisted of only purple and light pink Skytress uniform pieces. The thought of wearing purple pants with a light pink blouse almost sent me over the edge. Fortunately, I was pleasantly surprised when I tried on the purple V-neck dress. The dress was extremely comfortable. Much to my amazement, Zach Posen won me over with his purple Skytress dress. Yessiree. I was excited to wear it. Shockingly, I had never worn a uniform dress before in my Skytress career. Zach Posen designed our new airline uniforms to be a throwback to the hey-days of flying. Mission accomplished Zach! Ron was working the first day we wore our new uniforms. He texted me from the crew lounge. Ron said it looked like we had stepped back into the 60’s. Yessiree. We all looked groovy. Sadly, we all didn’t feel groovy. Unfortunately, the purple uniforms came with multiple, unexplainable health issues. The stories and photographs were heartbreaking. I, too, had unfortunate health issues. Many Skytresses and Skyters vehemently fought to get out of this uniform. Our company finally agreed to let those of us adversely affected by the uniform to purchase and wear black and white clothing. The first day I wore my black and white pieces to work, I was flabbergasted. I finally could breathe on the airplane again. Plus, I didn’t cough like I had pneumonia. I was ecstatic. The majority of Skytresses and Skyters started wearing black and white uniform pieces. Eventually it was decided we could no longer wear the black and white uniform. Instead, new gray uniform pieces were manufactured. Essentially we are now wearing the gray uniforms Zach Posen had initially designed. Interestingly, the once coveted purple uniform pieces are no longer being produced.

I jokingly tell people we are back into our gray prison warden uniforms. Sadly, we no longer stand out from other airlines. When I was a new Skytress, the Senior Skytresses and Skyters could wear either a gray or navy uniform. Unfortunately, some Skytresses and Skyters would try to combine the gray and navy pieces. Good grief. That was a complete uniform compliance no-no. Just like our purple uniform pieces, the gray uniform pieces were eventually phased out. Alleluia…Navy prevailed! I was thrilled. Personally, I believe we looked much more cohesive, commanding and dare I say it,…uniform! Of course, I have my fingers crossed that we will eventually change from this gray uniform, too. Word on the street,…or rather word at 35,000 feet,…says we are supposed to be getting new navy accessories to wear with this current uniform. Hopefully, the navy will slowly work it’s way into pants, skirts, blazers, dresses and sweaters. Yessiree. Navy uniform, uniform-ity! Oh, how this navy uniform-loving Rerouted Skytress can dream!

This Wednesday I’ll start my 34th year as a Skytress. Holy Moly! No one is more astonished about this number than me. Being a Skytress was never,…..ever…on my radar. First of all, I was far from looking like the typical Skytress. Heck. I still am! Secondly, traveling to different places by myself sounded horrible. I was positive I wasn’t brave enough to do this. Worst yet…I had never worked as a waitress on the ground. Heck. I had never made coffee! Even worse, I had no clue how to serve anyone, anything. When our family friend, Mary, suggested I apply to my airline, I did it mainly to bide time from getting a job with my chosen college degree or starting law school. Filling out an application sounded much better than polishing up my resume. Heck. Working out four hours a day to lose the weight to make the weight requirement was more desirable than working on my resume. If I am being honest, I’m starting my 34th year as a Skytress simply because I am still too lazy to work on a resume.

I learned very quickly when I became a Skytress, exceptional coffee making skills weren’t needed. No siree. I just needed the skills to place a coffee pack in the coffee maker and push the button. Heck. I had those exemplary skills in spades. Yessiree. If the coffee is awful, it’s not because of me. I’m just the button pusher! I’ll admit. The required skill set for cooking the in-flight meals is a wee bit more involved. Yep. I have to set the suggested temperature and the cooking time BEFORE I push the button to cook the meals. Of course, throughout my career, there have been many days I taken on the role of a cooking technician. Just like our home ovens, some aircraft ovens can be finicky. Some cook too slow. Some cook too fast. Then there are days the catered meals come off the catering truck more chilled than normal. I remember some bitterly cold winters when the first-class and main-cabin soups were boarded frozen. It didn’t matter what temperature or how long the soups were cooked. No siree. Inevitably, the edge of the soups would get blazing hot, whilst the center of the soups remained frozen. There were many days I apologetically served those soups to the passengers. Fortunately, the passengers understood. Yessiree. People in cold climates definitely comprehend the cause and effect of bitterly cold weather on things. Eventually, a very clever person decided the soups should be boarded in thermoses. Eureka! The thermoses didn’t need to be heated and the soup was the ideal temperature inside. It was the perfect solution. Well, unless you have a temporary case of skyzheimers like I did one day. Unfortunately, I forgot the soups didn’t need to be heated. Yessiree. I turned the oven on with the thermoses inside. Do you know soup explodes out of thermoses when you turn the oven on? Well, I do now. Egads!

Thirty-four years ago, my triceps and biceps would get multiple daily workouts while flying. I’ll admit. I miss my sculpted arms. However, I don’t miss serving the meal trays in the main cabin on domestic flights. It was an aerobic workout every flight carrying two meal trays at a time to every row. Then we would stand holding the trays for an eternity while the passengers decided if they wanted to eat the chicken or steak. The major arm workout occurred while waiting for the bulkhead passengers to figure out how to get their tray table out of the armrest. These passengers had no difficulty re-stowing their tray tables, though. When it came time to pick up the hundred-plus meal trays, the bulkhead passengers usually had their meal trays on the floor at their feet. Yessiree. I don’t miss the meal services of old. Amazingly, or not….Thirty- four years later, the bulkhead passengers still have difficulty getting their tray tables out of the armrest. See? Unlike my sculpted arms, some things never change with time.

Traveling to different cities by myself these past thirty- four years hasn’t been horrible either. I’ve learned I have no difficulty exploring a new city on my own. I remember my first international trip to Hamburg, Germany. I went out exploring on my own before my crew met up for dinner. I was nervous about getting lost in a city where I didn’t speak the language. So, I made a plan. I walked one block around the hotel. Then I walked two blocks from the hotel. The more confident I got, the more I explored. I’ll admit. I still use this exploration plan in certain layover cities. Yessiree. I may be a senior Skytress. However, I still harbor the fear of getting lost forever on a layover. Thankfully, for me, there is usually at least one Skytress, Skyter, or Pilot that wants to go explore on our layovers. Heck. Some of my most memorable layovers have been with my crew in tow. Airline people are exceptionally fun. We love to jump in boats, on trains, in cars, in taxis, or just walk to the next best adventure. Believe me. I’ve had 34- glorious years of adventures with my airline family.

When I first became a Skytress I received a packet stating how many years I had until retirement. It was 41 years. I laughed when I read it. I had no intention of being a Skytress for more than a year. I was going to fly a year then go off to law school. Seven years in I started studying to become a Secret Service Agent. When I took the voluntary furlough in 2006 to move back home to take care of my Dad while he battled cancer, I had no intention of returning to fly. Before Ron passed away, we talked about flying for just five more years. When Covid hit, I seriously debated taking the early retirement package and starting a new career path. Yessiree. I have had one Skytress leg out the door for 34 years. I’ll admit. I don’t know how many more years I will continue to fly. The urge to retire and start something new has never been stronger. Still, after 34 years, the thought of working on a resume is still pretty undesirable. Yessiree. I may make it to 35 years of being a Skytress simply because I’m still too lazy to work on a resume. Heck. I may make it to 41 years simply for the same reason!

When I was a young Skytress we used to fill out supply lists for every city we flew into. We had separate supply lists for the forward galleys and for the back galleys. Every city had supplies. Even the smaller cities. The smaller cities usually had a small metal storage closet with very limited supplies. So, unless you needed more peanuts or cocktail napkins, you might have to do without. Thus, I learned very quickly how to apologize for not having a passenger’s drink of choice. Back then, I mostly apologized for not having Dr. Pepper products when we were flying out of the smaller Southern cities. Our Southern passengers loved Dr. Pepper products. Well, Southerners anywhere other than Atlanta. Atlanta passengers have always been devoted Coca-Cola drinkers. Midwestern passengers have their beverage of choice, too. It’s funny, but, Skytresses and Skyters can tell where we are flying based on passengers drink orders alone. Beverage consistency. Yessiree. I’ll drink to that.

Many younger Skytresses and Skyters aren’t aware that we used to serve Dr. Pepper products. Heck. They don’t know we used to serve Cherry Coke, Caffeine-Free Diet Coke, or even grapefruit juice. I believe I was the only Skytress that drank the grapefruit juice. So, I understand why they got rid of it. We also got rid of Amaretto, Courvoisier, Kahlua, Black Label Johnnie Walker, Crown Royal, Gin Martinis, Pawberry Punch and hot chocolate to just name a few products. I’ll admit. I don’t miss the Gin Martini’s. More specifically, I don’t miss the the olives that we served with the Gin Martinis. The olive jars on most of the airplanes were grotesque. The jars were usually sticky from the the brine contents leaking from the jar lids. The unidentifiable floaties in the jars would instantaneously cause a gag reflex in even the stoutest person. Happily, there was absolutely no gag reflex when it came to the Kahlua. I didn’t know one Skytress or Skyter that didn’t love the sweet aroma of this liquor. Whether we were pouring it into coffee or making a Black Russian or White Russian cocktail, it didn’t matter. The smell of the Kahlua instantly made everything and everyone happier. Heck. We should seriously think about pumping this smell into all our aircrafts!

One smell that has been missing from our aircrafts for a few years now is the smell of roasted peanuts. Southern passengers loved drinking their Coca-Cola beverages while chomping on their peanuts. True Southerners would call their peanuts, “goobers”. The truest of true Southern passengers would pour their goobers into their glass of Coke and drink it this way. When I first saw a passenger do this I thought it was extremely odd. Over time, I found it endearing. I, also, now find it endearing when Midwest passengers ask for Vernors. When I was a young Skytress I had no idea what Vernors was. I would tell the passengers we didn’t have Vernors. Then I would proudly tell the passengers all the soda products we served. I found it very interesting that they would consistently choose Ginger Ale to drink. Little did I know Vernors IS Ginger Ale! Egads, Eileen! Thankfully for me, the Salt Lake City passengers have always called Ginger Ale…Ginger Ale. Not surprisingly, we serve cases of Ginger Ale, Sprite and water on our flights into and out of Salt Lake City. We used to serve cartons of milk on these flights, too. However, our Salt Lake passengers no longer drink milk on our flights. No siree. Milk left when Covid came. I’ll admit. I don’t miss the milk. Many times catering would cram the milk cartons into the ice drawers. This typically caused the cartons to leak. Thus, the ice would turn a murky color. It reminded me of the water we used to serve ages ago before bottled water became a staple item and request. Yessiree. Long ago when a passenger asked for water, we would pour it directly from the aircraft spigot….which came directly from the aircraft water tanks. I’ll admit. The water was as cloudy as a Seattle day. Skytresses and Skyters had to patiently wait in the galley for the cloudiness to clear before they went back into the cabin to serve the glass of water. Well, we would wait patiently if we liked you. If for some reason a passenger got under our skin, we would happily prance that cup of cloudy water to the passenger’s seat and tell them to, “Enjoy”.

California passengers definitely enjoy our bottled water. We serve copious amounts of water on these flights. We, also, serve generous amounts of hot tea, too. California passengers, along with our other West Coast passengers, request tea so frequently we actually brew pots of tea instead of handing out individual tea bags. Interestingly, these West Coast passengers typically request herbal, camomile or green tea with honey. Interestingly, I serve them English Breakfast tea with a couple packets of sugar. Yessiree. That’s as good as it gets on the domestic side of flying. West Coast passengers are usually our decaf drinkers, too. Our decaf coffee now comes in a Starbucks packet. It’s strong. If you haven’t gotten under our skin, we will tell you it’s strong, too. Otherwise, we say, “Enjoy!”. Starbucks is the Sanka of the past. Incredibly, Sanka decaf coffee packets were much stronger than the Starbucks we serve now. Back then we used to pour the Sanka directly into the cup for the passengers and stir it for them. I’ll admit. We used to barely stir the Sanka so they would never ask for it again. Heck. It was a pain to go back to the galley and search for it. I’ll, also, admit we didn’t stir the hot chocolate very well for the same reason. Since I’m in a confessing mood, I’ll confess to what we used to do when we actually brewed pots of decaf and regular coffee. Well, ….when it was getting near the end of the flight, we would pour out the pots of regular brewed coffee and keep the pot of decaf coffee. Then if a passenger asked for regular coffee or decaf coffee we would pour a cup of the decaf. We affectionately referred to it as the “universal” coffee. Yessiree. It was safe to serve to both decaf drinkers and regular coffee drinkers. No one was the wiser. Well, except for the Skytresses and Skyters. I’ll admit. I’ll drink to that.

Floridians love to drink tomato juice and Bloody Mary Mix. They love Bloody Mary Mix even more when they throw vodka in it. Passengers heading to Florida from Canada call this drink a Caesar. Canadians, also, don’t request tomato juice like true Floridians. They request Clamato juice. Sadly, for Canadians and Floridians we don’t serve Clamato or tomato juice. We never did serve Clamato juice. However, Canadians are so nice, I wish we did. Now we no longer serve tomato juice…..domestically that is. Yessiree. Tomato juice left when Covid came. Happily, I can report the actual cans of juice that left when Covid came…are back. Woo hoo! The boxed juices are gone! It’s a Skytress and Skyter’s dream come true. We, also, now serve cans of wine. So, when the Montreal passengers ask for white wine for breakfast….and they most certainly do…I just have to pop a can of white wine…and pour. It’s a win-win for everyone!

I recently learned East Coast passengers adore Topo Chico Hard Seltzer. Who knew? Definitely not me. I thought they only drank coffee regular….meaning coffee with cream and sugar. Syracuse passengers drink Topo Chico like it water. It’s like the Woodford we serve going to Kentucky. Or the Woodford we serve in first class or Comfort Plus. These passengers drink Woodford like it’s water, too. Of course, the first class and Comfort Plus passengers drink Woodford because it’s free. But, so is the water. Kentuckians drink Woodford….because it’s Woodford. Free or not. It’s not unlike the passengers flying to Las Vegas or Cancun. They drink liquor…because it’s liquor. Free or not.

Skytresses and Skyters can’t drink alcohol while on duty. But, we sure can drink everything else. Typically though, no matter where we are based, our beverage of choice are the large bottles of water. And now that limes are returning to our flights, I’m confident the extra limes will be plopped into these bottles like they were prior to Covid. If you didn’t know, lemons and limes were removed when Covid came. Yessiree. The thought of someone placing a precut lemon or lime in a drink during Covid was just too risky. Everyone has been pleading for the precut lemons and limes to return. Skytresses and Skyters say they want to be able to serve a lemon or lime in the passenger’s drinks upon request. But, who are we fooling? The large bottles of water just taste better with lemon and limes slices shoved in them. Prior to 9-11, We used to cut our own lemon and lime slices with the galley knife. After 9-11, the galley knives were taken off for security reasons. The knife blade wasn’t sharp enough to cut your finger. But, darn it could cut the lemons and limes. Skytresses and Skyters would cut slits in the lemons and limes so we could hang the fruit on the edge of the passenger’s glass. Fancy indeed! My friend, Tara, flew for United. She was flabbergasted when I told her we cut our own lemons and limes. I was flabbergasted to find out their lemons and limes came precut. I asked Tara how they got the lemons and limes to sit on the rim of the glasses if there weren’t slits in them. She told me they just dropped the fruit into the passnger’s glass. I was horrified. After 9-11, our lemons and limes came precut in plastic containers, too. Funny. It didn’t take me too long to get over my hoity toity fruit slits. I threw those lemons and limes in the passenger’s glasses like they did at United….and I was as content as I could be.

Our beverage selections at our airline have changed a wee bit throughout the years. I’m content with this fact, too. After all, change can be good for everyone. Yessiree. It’s true Skytresses and Skyters loathed the cocktail shakers we had to use when we got new cocktail mixers. However, everyone loved the actual mixed cocktails. It was a refreshing change for both the passengers and the Skytresses and Skyters. Still, it’s comforting to know I have spent 72 of my 33 Skytress years waiting for the Diet Coke and Coke Zero to de-foam on our flights from multiple Florida cities to Cincinnati. I’ll admit. It’s excruciating at the time watching the de-foaming process. But, at least I’m prepared for this process long before the passengers step on board the aircraft. Yessiree. I tell you, beverage consistency soothes my Skytress soul! In a profession where so many things are unpredictable, beverage predictability based on where we are flying is a great thing. Yessiree. I’ll definitely drink to that!

Did you know there is an airplane curse? Yessiree. It’s the curse of the light-passenger load. I know my fellow Skytresses and Skyters are shaking their heads in agreement. So what is the curse? Well, the curse of the light load is this….Skytresses and Skyters will work harder on a light-passenger flight than on a full passenger flight. It is a phenomenon that has been around as long as there have been passengers. Passengers will ring their call buttons a thousand times more on a light flight than a full flight. If they don’t touch their call buttons, they happily grab our arms or poke us as we are walking up and down the aisle. On light flights passengers aren’t trapped in their row. Thus, they freely walk to the forward and aft galleys in search of….well,…in search of anything that tickles their fancy. More often though, they are searching for the weakest link. The weakest link is the Skytress or Skyter they feel will be more accommodating to their whimsical needs. We have all been the weakest link on our flights. Interestingly, the weakest link can change multiple times during a flight. Yessiree. Oh, how I curse, the curse of the light-passenger load flight!

The other day when we were heading to Portland, Oregon we had a light passenger load. You guessed it. The conditions were ideal for the light-passenger load curse. Amazingly, the woman passenger sitting in row 12 single-handedly brought the curse to life. Egads!

Seasoned Skytresses and Skyters will shake their heads in agreement that passengers traveling to certain cities have a reputation. Portland passengers have a reputation of being,….how shall I say this gently?…they are quite often very odd passengers. This particular flight, the married couple in row 12 was definitely odd. The couple had booked their seats so the husband could sit next to the window and the wife could sit on the aisle. Neither one wanted the dreaded middle seat. Unfortunately for the woman that was sitting in the dreaded middle seat, the married couple argued over her head from the moment she sat down. Thankfully, since were weren’t full, we were able to re-seat the woman. In hindsight, this could have been the couple’s nefarious plan. The couple relished the extra space. Especially the wife sitting on the aisle. The wife obviously knew she could now easily raise her arm to ring her call button or wave us down in the aisle. She could, also, leave her seat multiple times without disturbing anyone sitting next to her. Astonishingly, the wife happily did all of these things the entire flight. Heck. If her seat had been a revolving door, it would have spun constantly for three hours from her continuous movement. I personally felt the aircraft temperature drop four degrees just from the wind she created frantically waving me down to get a headset. The fact I was standing right next to her seat while she was wildly flailing her arms about didn’t seem to phase her in the least. I’ll admit. It didn’t phase me either. In my head I reminded myself we were heading to Portland. Heck. I wasn’t phased either when she asked for three headsets. One for her husband. Two for her.

I chuckled a few minutes later when Skytress Sharan came back to the galley and informed me of the woman’s latest antics. Skytress Sharan said the woman gleefully grabbed eight snacks from the Comfort Plus basket. Now, the snacks in the basket are boarded to serve five rows of passengers….only if each passenger takes one, possibly two snacks each. The woman in 12C wasn’t concerned about this fact. Not one bit.

During the first beverage service the woman in 12C asked for two cans of Bloody Mary Mix…Two cups of water…A coffee with eight creamers…. Two Woodfords for herself…..And two Woodfords for her husband. Only she called them “Woodburns”. She, also, took one of each of our complimentary snacks…..Sun Chips, almonds, a Biscoff cookie and a lemon coconut energy bar. Incredibly,….or maybe not incredibly,….before we finished serving the rest of the cabin, the woman rang her call button. She wanted two more cups of water. I’ll admit. The woman in 12C was the topic of our conversation when we arrived back in the galley.

When it was time to conduct our coffee service, I told Skytress Sharan and Skytress Pam that I would take the tray of coffees out for the passengers. As I walked up the aisle, I prepared myself for the interaction with row 12. I turned towards the couple and asked them if they would like any coffee. The husband completely ignored me. The wife enthusiastically said yes. I then asked her if she needed any cream or sugar for her coffee. I expected her reply to be eight creamers like she had requested with her coffee earlier. However, my body language must have signaled to the woman I wasn’t the weakest link on the crew. By golly, I had her number! At that moment I couldn’t easily be taken advantage of. The woman hesitated. I tilted my head towards the creamers and looked the woman squarely in her eyes. My hand hovered over the cup of creamers impatiently waiting for her reply. Instead of asking for eight creamers, the woman reluctantly asked me for six creamers. I’ll admit. It was a small personal victory for me.

The woman in 12C quickly recovered from the coffee creamer defeat. Yessiree. She asked Skytress Sharan and Skytress Pam for additional water and two cans of Blood Mary Mix when they walked up the aisle to pick up the trash. Since Skytress Pam and I were busy refilling drink requests from multiple passengers, Skytress Sharan brought the woman her extra beverages. Skytress Sharan returned to the galley moments later. She told us the woman immediately put the cans of Bloody Mary Mix in her bag when she handed it to her. I’d like to say Skytress Pam and I were flabbergasted….but, were weren’t. A short time later the woman came back to use the lavatory. When she exited the lavatory she asked us for more water and snacks. Several passengers followed her lead when they came out of the lavatories. They, too, asked for more drinks and snacks. Several passengers commented that they didn’t normally ask for more items. However, they recognized it wasn’t a full flight. Thus, they knew we weren’t busy and could easily grant their requests. Yessiree. The curse of the light load was in full swing.

Our Skyter In-Charge, Meredith, walked to the back galley to check on us and the main cabin passengers. We told him we all had been spinning on our heels taking care of multiple passenger request the entire flight. We then told him about the woman in row 12. He was well-aware of her. He told us she had walked up to the first-class galley while he was quietly eating his crew meal. He told us he had closed the galley curtains so he could eat his meal out of view from the passengers. The woman in 12C brashly opened the closed curtain and asked him for more “Woodburn”. When Skyter Meredith said, “Woodburn”, we all burst out laughing. “Woodburn” had become our favorite word of the flight. Without skipping a beat, Skyter Meredith mentioned the curse of the light passenger load. We laughed even harder. We all watched the woman in 12C stop Skyter Meredith as he walked back to first class. Moments later he returned to her seat with several small bottles of water. We shook our heads in disbelief. Later in the flight Skyter Meredith returned to the aft galley. Skyter Meredith proudly proclaimed that he was now the weakest link on the crew. He said the woman in 12C knew it….and she was taking full advantage of this fact. As Skyter Meredith was telling us this, we watched the woman leave her seat and head towards the forward galley. We watched her boldly open the galley curtain. Skyter Meredith laughed. He said 12C was looking for the weakest link so she could get some more “Woodburn”. When the woman realized Skyter Meredith wasn’t there, she walked into the forward lavatory. The four of us stood in the middle of the aft galley so we could keep our eyes on the first-class lavatory. Finally, the woman exited the lavatory. She again looked around for Skyter Meredith. Skyter Meredith chuckled. He reiterated that he was truly the weakest link on the crew. Between our laughter, we told him we couldn’t agreed more!

The next two days of flying were uneventful. Well, except for the fact on day two we didn’t keep our originally scheduled aircraft. No siree. We had to switch to an aircraft that was being worked on by maintenance. The mechanics then posted a further maintenance delay on this aircraft. So, we had to switch aircraft once again. Only this time we had to wait. Our new aircraft was still enroute to Seattle. Eventually, we took off for San Francisco an hour and a half later than scheduled. Of course, this all happened on the longest day of our three-day trip. But, after THAT,…the rest of the trip was uneventful. Yessiree. The remainder of our flights were full. The passengers were well aware of this fact, too. It was beautiful. Not one passenger repeatedly rang their call button. Not one passenger grabbed our arms or poked us while we were walking up the aisle to ask us for extra drinks or snacks. Heck. Hardly any passengers leisurely walked to the back of the aircraft to use the lavatories. Nope. They were all trapped in their rows by fellow passengers. The aircraft curse was non-existent! Still, the four of us joked about who was the weakest link on each flight. Randomly, we would ask each other if we had any of that, “Woodburn” for the passenger in row 12. Every time we said “Woodburn” be would smile and laugh. Yessiree. The curse of the light- passenger load may get old…but, “Woodburn” never will.

The Rerouted Skytress is celebrating it’s third anniversary! Thankfully, there is flour in the grocery store to make a cake to celebrate. Three years ago, this wasn’t the case. Heck. Three years ago, it was mentality challenging just to walk into the grocery store. Egads! I don’t miss those days. I’ll admit. I do miss the days of lounging around the house watching the Cowboy and Hallmark Channels. Yes. I still watch those channels. However, I’m not lounging around the house like I did back then. Yessiree. I actually have to go to work to get a paycheck these days. More importantly, I have to go to work to get stories for The Rerouted Skytress blog. Fortunately, I have a wonderful trip to write about this week. It’s a trip that starts with the Rerouted Skytress wishing she got rerouted. Thankfully, I didn’t. Because, I had a phenomenal trip.

I was looking forward to my long Nashville layover from the day our monthly bid results came out. Unfortunately, my Nashville friends weren’t able to get together on my layover. Still, I knew I would have a marvelous time in Nashville. Heck. It’s Nashville! Incredibly, 45 minutes outside of landing, I was starting to pray we would land anywhere besides Nashville. You see, Mother Nature was extremely mad that night. She was producing nasty storms all across the Midwest. We dealt with rough air from Atlanta to Seattle. The rough air increased as we flew from Seattle to Nashville. As we approach Nashville from the East, …yes, you read this correctly,…we were no longer bumping along with the rough weather. No siree. We were now swishing and swaying with the incredible crosswinds. It was an extremely unsettling feeling. I’ll admit. I have never prayed so much on an approach in my career. The Captain had informed the crew earlier that we were going to fly between two storm systems on our approach into Nashville. He, also, informed us we had alternate cities available for a diversion. The longer I held on to the slide bustle in the back of the Boeing 737-900 to steady myself from the crosswinds jostling us about, the more I wished we would divert to one of those cities. Heck. I could always go back to Nashville for a long layover. I was mentally counting the minutes until we landed. I was confident our pilots would execute the perfect landing. It was just excruciating getting to that point. When we touched down in Nashville the passengers applauded. I would have applauded too. Only, I was busy saying prayers of thanks to God.

It was after 1am when we arrived at the ground transportation area. Our scheduled shuttle driver wasn’t there. The First Officer was watching the shuttle driver driving further away from the airport on the shuttle app. Fortunately, our Captain made the quick decision to pay for a cab to take us to the hotel. Despite the fact I had been up over 24 hours, I couldn’t fall asleep when I got to my hotel room. However, I wasn’t going to let the lack of sleep keep me from wandering around Nashville on my layover. Heck. It was Nashville! My new Skytress friend, Angela, and I met in the hotel lobby at noon. Angela was as excited as I was to explore Nashville. Fortunately, it was an incredibly beautiful Saturday. The storms had given way to sunshine and gusty winds. Unlike the crosswinds we experienced on our approach into Nashville, these winds felt delightfully exhilarating.

Skytress Angela and I had barely left the hotel when I noticed a couple wearing St. Louis Blues hockey shirts. I was about to say something when I noticed more people walking about with Blues paraphernalia on. It suddenly dawned on me the Blues were playing the Nashville Predators at the Bridgestone Arena. I felt a little guilty I was in town and not going to the game to root for my Blues. The guilt disappeared when I saw the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum. I couldn’t help myself. I smiled ridiculously when I saw the building. Yes. I may listen to Canadian country music these days. However, my favorite country artists are enshrined in the Country Music Hall of Fame. Skytress Angela and I decided to keep walking over to Broadway. Broadway is is where the notorious Nashville bars and restaurants are located. It’s, also, where the party buses and pedal pushing bars frequent. I’ll admit. I saw more twerking on party buses in a three block radius than I have witnessed my entire life.

Skytress Angela and I walked with the throngs of people down Broadway. We eventually decided to break off from the legions of people and turned down a side street. Skytress Angela immediately saw the sign for the Johnny Cash Museum. I immediately saw the sign for the Goo Goo Cluster Candy Store. Since the candy store didn’t have an admission fee, we decided to check it out instead of the museum. After all, it’s a Nashville institution. Just like Johnny Cash. The store’s crisp red and white interior was invigorating. This, coupled with a store filled of chocolate, made both of us giddy. Shall I say it? Yes. I shall…We were definitely two kids in a candy store! We happily checked out all the Goo Goo Cluster items in the store. We could have designed personalized chocolate bars on the touch screen kiosk. Then we could have watched the chocolatiers make our custom designed chocolate bars on the opposite side of the store. Ultimately, Skytress Angela decided to buy a beautifully designed chocolate bonbon. I opted to purchase two boxes of classic Goo Goo Cluster chocolates for Easter. Yessiree. I did not regret my decision in the least.

I had decided when my Nashville friends couldn’t get together that I was going to visit the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum. I wanted to go inside the Hall of Fame when we walked by it earlier in the day. However, Skytress Angela had mentioned when we met in the hotel lobby that she wasn’t sure she wanted to pay the admission price for any of the museums in Nashville. When we left the candy store I decided I was going to go back to the museum….and I was taking Skytress Angela with me. I told Angela I was going to treat her to the museum. Heck. Skytress Angela had only been flying for two months. We needed to create some lasting layover memories for her. Plus, I wanted to properly welcome her to our crazy airline family.

I love all genres of music. However, country music truly speaks to my heart. You may remember my post about my neighborhood where I get to pick my neighbors. Dolly Parton, Reba McEntire, Trisha Yearwood and Garth Brooks were some of my closest neighbors. I was tickled to see my neighbors and my other country favorites proudly represented at the Country Music Hall of Fame. I was fascinated by the artifacts on exhibit. Many displays evoked a memory from my past. Some country artist names I hadn’t thought about in years. Some older names I didn’t know. Still I knew they played an essential part for my love of country music. I marveled at the colorful outfits, boots and instruments in the glass display cases. I was shocked my reaction to Elvis Presley’s gold-plated Cadillac was so nonchalant. Then again, I had just gawked at Webb Pierce’s Pontiac Bonneville Convertible moments before. The customized Nudie Mobile complete with its revolver car handles, silver shotgun on the trunk and miniature saddle insert in the front seat had set the Country star car gold-standard for me. Speaking of gold. The gold records hanging from the multiple walls in the museum was utterly impressive. My only regret was I didn’t have time to read all the information that accompanied the displays. Oh, well. This just means I will gladly have to visit the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum again!

Skytress Angela and I left the museum just as the hockey game ended. The streets were overflowing with people. We walked down Broadway to find a place to eat. Our efforts were futile. People were waiting in long lines to enter every restaurant and bar on Broadway. Music flowed from each establishment we passed by. I couldn’t fathom how one band or singer could ever become famous in a city that just oozes with talent. Whenever we passed an open restaurant window and I saw a drummer enthusiastically beating on his drums, I thought of Ron. Ron was an exceptionally talented drummer. Needless to say, Ron loved laying over in Nashville because of the tremendously talented musicians. Ultimately, Skytress Angela and I decided our best bet was to leave Broadway and head to side streets to find a less crowded restaurant. We decided to eat at a restaurant down the street from our hotel. Of course, we both ordered the Nashville chicken. It would have been a sin if we didn’t. The Nashville chicken was scrumptious. We finished our meal just in time to meet up with the rest of our crew back at the hotel. The hotel had a complimentary happy hour and dinner fare. The Captain and First Officer were already waiting when we arrived. The rest of our crew trickled in after Skytress Angela and I sat down. One by one, we recounted how we had spent our day in Nashville. We spent the remainder of the evening talking and laughing. It was a rare treat for all of us to gather around a table and hang out as a crew. My crew and I continued laughing and joking as we stepped into the elevator to head to our respective hotel rooms. As I walked to my room, I was so grateful we made it to Nashville. All the praying I had done the night before on our approach into the airport was totally worth it. I thought to myself, “Hooray for The Rerouted Skytress not being rerouted!”

Hooray for “The Rerouted Skytress” celebrating it’s third anniversary! I can only fathom the stories I will blog about this coming year. I’m confident the Rerouted Skytress will get rerouted a few times. Hopefully, the reroutes will be blog worthy. Heck. If I have to be rerouted, I should at least get a good blog story out of it. Fortunately for you my sweet readers, summertime flying is fast approaching. All Skytresses and Skyters know summertime flying produces some of the best stories. I surmise several of these stories will be survival stories. Yessiree. Stories of how we survived the summer passengers and newly hired Skytresses and Skyters. I anticipate on having some fabulous layovers to blog about, too. That’s a hint, hint and a wink, wink to the bidding gods. If not, I’ll just have to create some fun layovers so I can blog about them.

I want to thank you all, again for reading my blog. This journey would not be the same without you all. You all are the most loyal, gracious passengers this Rerouted Skytress could ever ask for. Once again, I have booked a first-class seat for you all so we can ponder life, share some laughs and possibly shed a tear or two. So…Here’s to an adventurous fourth year. In the infamous written words of Ron, “Let’s have a great trip”.